Tag Archives: motherhood

Things Toddlers Say

Happy Tuesday! I hope wherever you are, it’s not quite as cold as it is here… but I guess the groundhog did sentence us with six more weeks of winter, so who are we to be surprised? Here are your weekly funnies!

In the car, behind a garbage truck…
J: What’s that on the back of that truck?
Hubby: A trash compactor.
J: I wish our car had a trash compactor.

D: I wan’ bananassss!
Me: Okay. *peels banana and hands it to him*
*two minutes pass, no bites taken*
Me: *takes a bite*
D: You stealing my bananassss?!

D to my friend: Come on! Mobies and abocados!
Friend: You taking me on a date?!

J, arriving at the park as the rain starts: Uuugghhh. I told you it wasn’t a good day to go to the park.

J: I’ll just take one more bite.
Me: If you want dessert, you need to take about ten more bites.
J: How about 138?!
Me: Sounds perfect!

D’s new misnomers…
Heart=heark
Secret=seekit
Pink=pank

J, talking to a sick EK: Miss Emilie said at chapel dis morning dat God will heal the sickness away!
EK: Did you hear what he told me?!

Things Toddlers Say

I’m so glad it’s Tuesday! I love sharing these little quips and sillies with you. I hope you enjoy them!

J: Can I have a special drink tonight that isn’t sprite?
Hubby: What’s wrong with sprite?
J: Sprite wasn’t working for me.

J, trying to get his buddies to surprise us: Okay, on my count. One, two, threeeee!

J at an Italian restaurant: It’s nice to be in this place. Well, it’s nice to be in the whole world.

J’s new favorite word: defint-ly. (Definitely. And he definitely says it several times in one sentence.)

D, reaching his hand into my pasta: Let me share with you!

Annie (their grandma): Do you want five more M&Ms?
D: Six!
Annie: Six?!
D: Seben!

J, holding up one of his hands toward me: Every single finger on this hand has a cut. I look… damaged.
(Same convo, a little later.)
J: The most what is on me is cuts.
Ek: No, the most what is on you is hair. And pajamas. And dirt.

D, bringing EK’s mittens: I want EK’s thumbs!
Hubby finally explained to me why he might call them that… whenever we put mittens on him, we always tell him to stick out his thumbs!

Things Toddlers Say

Happy Tuesday!! I hope you enjoy the funnies!

EK: He made your soup so fast!
J: No…
EK: Yes he did!
J: No… he made it quickly.

Me: One, two….?
D: …
Me: …
D: …
Me: Three! Four, five, six,
D, interrupting me: Seben!!!!!!!
Me: You got seven but not three?!

D, with a rolling pin inside his shirt: Mama look! I got a sword in my pocket!

Hubby: Here’s some falafel for you!
J: This isn’t waffles!

EK: And guess what?! We got lollipops! J got strawberry and I got watermelon and D got… he got green bean.
Me: I think it’s green apple…

I had asked EK to run a bath, and she came back up shouting: Mom! The light has run out of power in there!

EK referring to hand, foot, mouth: …and we all had footprints.

D about pterodactyls: I need da carrot-dactyl!

A few one-liners this week, eh? What are your kiddos saying these days? Or shall I say “saying improperly” these days?!

Things Toddlers Say

Happy Tuesday! If you live near me, you’re probably enjoying some beautiful weather today! I hope you’re getting your January allotment of Vitamin D! It just so happens that this is my 700th post published on my blog! That blows my mind. I can’t believe I’ve written that much, but I suppose after a few years, you just do. Anyway, here are the funnies!! Enjoy!

EK: You guys are the best family ever. Better than any family in the world!

EK to her sick dad: I know what you need! A nose rocket ship to go up there and make you unsick!
Hubby: If that was actually a thing, I’d let it in my nose.

EK, handing J a napkin: Here, use this.
J: I don’t need a napkin!
EK: What?! Look at the table!
J: *looks at drops of hot chocolate*
Ek: Yeah. You need it.

MK, our babysitter: What do you want for dinner?
D: Chocolate pizza!
MK: Well, pizza we can do.

D one morning: I want donuts! Chocolate donut! With spinkles in it. And a ‘poon.

J: *draws a spider web* Look Dad!
Hubby: You’re a good little spider.
J: I’m not a spider! My name’s Joseph and I make everything cool!

What are your kiddos saying these days?!

Things Toddlers Say

Happy Tuesday, and happy New Year! In honor of the first Tuesday of 2018, I’ve got a few really funny ones. Enjoy!

EK: Are you gonna have another baby?
Me: What makes you ask that?
EK: I just was thinking if you had four babies. Wait! What if you had a hundred and five babies?!?!
J: Phew. That’s a lot of babies to feed.
Me: My thoughts exactly.

J waking up on his birthday: Is it today?!
Me: Yes! Today you’re four!
J: Well, my hands still look three.

EK got a ballerina Barbie and a Wonder Woman doll at Christmas. I overheard her ask her cousin: Hey! Do you want to play super heroes save the ballerinas?

J: Do you know where my Iron Man is?
Me: No, buddy, I’m sorry.
J, cool as a cucumber: Oh well. Toys get lost very easily.

J with the charm: You sound like you’re stupid but I still love you, EK.

Clutching a dinosaur he put together, J: This dinosaur is my only friend.

D, on night three of a big boy bed: Okay, lay down!
Me: Yes, time to lay down. Good night, and I love you! (I head to close the door)D: Lub you, Mama. Good niiiiiiiight! (Out like a light 2 minutes later.)

J: Now that I’m four, I’m fifteen big!

D, while eating carrots: Carrots are like volcano!
Me: Mmm… yeahhhh… of course.

Have your kids had any funnies you can share?!

Things Toddlers Say

Happy 6 days till Christmas! We’re excited at our house – how about you? Have a wonderful, restful, joyful week and enjoy our funnies!

J: Look what I made!
EK: That looks terrible.
Me: *side eye*
EK: I mean that looks great! I forgot what I was gonna say.

EK, singing: I wanna be a pretty butterfly, yeah! I wanna be another pretty butterfly!

EK: A friend in my class already has a phone! She’s six! And only in kindergarten! She even knows how to use it!

EK when I woke her up in the morning: Can I just have a few minutes to wake up? Like Dad?

J and EK drinking hot chocolate…
EK: Let’s pretend this is coffee!
J: How’s your coffee, Whit? (He’s pretending he is hubby and EK is me.)

EK being very silly and flouncing in a tutu (knee-deep in a Nutcracker obsession): Look at my girlgeous (as in “gorgeous”) butt!

D is convinced that this pink bear is a pig:

Hubby getting called out…
J: That light was red but you didn’t stop.
Hubby: Back seat drivers.

What are you funnies? I want to hear the hilarious things YOUR kids say!

Why Five Minutes Makes Me a Better Parent

This article originally appeared on Perfection Pending.

It’s overwhelming, this whole motherhood thing. I think back to the days of answering only to myself, and doing things only when I felt like it… I don’t necessarily miss those days, but I’d give a large sum of money for a day or two like that every once in a while.

When I get up in the morning, it’s usually to the sounds of (at least) one of the kids. Often, it’s the jabbering of my youngest, playing happily in his crib, knowing I’ll come and get him soon. Those days are so nice. I can go to the bathroom, wash my face, and drink a little water before I start the diaper change and breakfast hustle. But other days, I hear stomping on the stairs, drawers opening and closing, or even cries of, “He hit me!” or something similar. As you can imagine, that’s not quite as pleasant at start. Some days just begin in a more relaxing way than others.

I find myself, on difficult days, craving a moment to myself. That could be almost any sort of moment… for instance, I love the grocery store. I could take a mile-long grocery list to the store, alone, ideally with a cappuccino, and it would be the perfect hour: super productive, not a waste of time, but relaxing, and also delicious if I ended up with that fancy drink. Just to have that bit of time to myself to regroup is my biggest desire in a hectic day. I suppose that’s how the memes about moms eating chocolate while locked in the bathroom are born. Boy, can I relate.

But actually taking the minute to myself doesn’t happen as much as needing it does. If I end up – for whatever reason – pushing through my need for a break, I’ll just end up back feeling crazed again in another half an hour. If I don’t take the moment I need to center myself, zap my coffee and take a big swig, or sit down and zone out for a minute or five. I’m so driven by productivity and “getting things done so that I can relax later” that I rarely let myself take a few minutes for myself before the to-do list is finished.

I do know one thing, though. I can prevent the feelings of stress and anxiety from getting worse (and sometimes break that cycle entirely, if I’m lucky) by taking that time I need for myself sooner. Need a breather? Take one. Need to just sit down for a few minutes? Do it. Need three minutes to calm your brain and scroll through Instagram? That’s just fine. There are very few things on my “list” that won’t still be there in five minutes – including the kids. A mental break is just as important as a physical one, but sometimes I can’t pull my brain out of the frenzy unless I pull my body out of it, too. Sometimes, I even leave the house… I step out to the back porch, or walk to get the mail. Sunshine and fresh air are an immediate shock to my system when it’s bogged down by detailed-oriented tasks and grabby hands that need me. The way my home is set up, the kids are usually in the room that leads to the porch, and it’s full of windows, so I’m not exactly leaving them unattended. But I’m getting out of the situation enough to hear birds instead of the arguing, or to see sun and trees instead of the pile of laundry I was about to get to. Sometimes, even sitting down with the kids and watching Octonauts is a break. It interrupts their cycle of crazy when I redirect them to something else, and it interrupts my cycle of “can’t slow my roll” when I get in there for a snuggle.

So, if you’re like me, sometimes (often?) wound up tightly, pushing yourself through those moments of anxiety or frustration in the sake of thinking you can handle it – or worse, for the sake of productivity – then give yourself a break. Take that minute, or 5, or 10 that you need. Do whatever you need to do to find the time, sooner rather than later, to let yourself unwind. Drink your coffee while it’s still hot. Sit down to chat or snuggle with your child before you get started on the dishes. Sneak that candy bar in the bathroom! There’s no shame in the game of saving your own sanity. You do something for you, mama, and don’t feel bad about it.