Tag Archives: potty training

Potty Training Is Hard.

This post also appeared on My Big Jesus!

I guess the title sorta gives this one away, huh?

I’m not saying anything that tons of parents haven’t said before. The idea that potty training is hard is not new. But for some reason, it really hit home how hard it was when I had my first poop-in-big-girl-panties experience. And then the second.

  
Gross, am I right? Bleaching the underwear, making sure nothing ended up on the floor, trying to firmly scold without shaming said potty trainer… those things are all important. That last one most of all. I feel like I’m stuck in a lame cycle of “Mommy’s so proud you used the potty!” and “We’ll try harder next time.” when what I really want to do is shout, at the top of my lungs, “YOU JUST WENT – WHY DIDN’T YOU POOP THEN?!”

Okay fine. I’ve shouted it. This morning at 8:00am, I shouted it.

I don’t want to shame my daughter. I don’t want to scare her into using the potty. I’d like to her use it for a good reason, like it’s less messy, or it’s more fun (no, that isn’t a stretch). I want to help her do the right thing, whether it’s use that porcelain throne or not bite her brother (I mean, does he taste good or something!?), because she knows to make the right choice, not because she’s scared of what I’ll say or do.

We’re in a season of pushing limits, repeating what I say (THAT is scary, if you’re not a parenting of a talking child yet.) and coming into her own. I’ve learned I have to clean up my mouth, watch my actions, and not project bad feelings onto my kids. She asks if I’m sad or mad when she can tell I’m not happy. And sometimes, I don’t want her to have that feeling put onto her. Sometimes, I don’t really need her to know I’m totally fed up at cleaning her messes when I know good and well she’s able to tell me when she needs to go (she told me once on a farm and used a Port-A-John, for goodness sake). I don’t want her to think I’m disappointed in her.

As for right now, stuck in potty training hell and knowing I’ve got two more rounds to go, I’m trying to set a good example. Not just for the practical side, but also the emotional side. I want to respond to unfavorable situations positively. I want to be an example of grace as I help her correct her mistakes. I want to (figuratively and literally) clean up the mess, and try harder next time. We both need a little grace to be the best we can be.

Parenting Fail #9337: Peeing Outside

This week, we’ve been visiting my parents in Georgia. They have a pool in the backyard, so my kids have been in and out of it since the moment we pulled in the driveway – literally. We got out of the car, and my parents were chilling on the porch, so of course my kids walked over, saw the pool, and flipped out. It was about 8:00pm, but still light out (summer!) so we just stripped them down, put on their Puddle Jumpers (If y’all don’t know about those, they are lifesavers. No pun intended.) and let them jump in. It was a nice stress release after a looooooong drive. Anyway…

So my kids have been spending lots of time out on the porch, or in the driveway, or walking laps around the house, checking out the nature scene. They’ve also been doing a lot of not really wearing clothes (once again, summer!). I mean, J in a diaper and a shirt, or EK in just her undies, it’s been hot, who cares?

So yesterday afternoon, we were all out on the porch, and EK had gotten out of the pool and gotten back into just her undies. She was playing with some magnetic letters, and all the sudden I look over and this is happening:

 She’s squatting, watching herself pee, right through the undies, right onto the deck. I just started laughing so hard I couldn’t even tell her to stop! My friend Lauren looked over, and started laughing too, and when Hubby came back outside, I was still laughing so hard I could barely speak. I had literally asked her if she needed to go potty less than five minutes before that. I was a little disappointed, but it was too hilarious for me to care much. Especially because she was proud she’d watched herself go…

 This whole potty training thing has been one of the most entertaining things I’ve ever done with EK. And she’s communicating more and more, so her bathroom commentary is hilarious.

Have you ever had a hilarious potty training fail? Tell me about it!

No Pull-Ups During Naps: Parenting Fail #397

Today, my daughter took a nap. Unremarkable, right? She took a nap. No big deal. But let me back up.

We’re in the throes of potty training. EK’s wearing big girl panties about half the time, and a pull-up or diaper the other half. She’s not sleeping in underwear yet, of course, so for today’s nap, Daddy didn’t find any diapers in her room (you know, because she’s only wearing them half the time, and we’ve only just moved her down to her new room), and put her in a pull-up. Most of the time, this wouldn’t present a problem; it holds pee fairly well and we change her directly after her nap every time. But today, when she woke up and came upstairs, she had a massively gross pull-up, which had gotten on her pants a bit, so Daddy cleaned her up, and let her run pantsless while I went downstairs to retrieve the underwear. (And then he ran away to “help his dad with something.” Yeah right, Daddy. You must’ve known what was coming…)

When I got to her room, I noticed two things: 1. There were wipes all over her bed. 2. It smelled awful. These are two bad things, that when put together, are truly terrible. The massively dirty pull-up had also caused a problem in the bed, which EK had so graciously tried to clean up before she came upstairs. Mess. Was. Everywhere. Every single item on her bed needed to go straight into the washing machine on the “hot” cycle. Y’all, I am not kidding. My heart started beating faster as I tried to not smell anything.

I bundled the wipes up (including the ones spread all over a book, which is now soggy and half-ruined) and threw them in the trash can, and started stripping the bed. I carried several loads of pillows, sheets and the waterproof (thank God) mattress cover to the laundry room (thank God we have a laundry room now! Ahhh!) to start the process of cleaning up. I sprayed everything with stain remover, switched the laundry over (because of course, something was already in the washer AND in the dryer) and put in the first load. Y’all, how did it happen?!

I know how it happened.

My kids sleep like tornadoes. And when they finally do find a resting place for the majority of a sleeping session, it’s typically a strange one. For instance, EK likes to sprawl across all her pillows, instead of have her head on a pillow and her legs down. She sleeps up against the headboard of the bed 90% of the time. Hence poop on the pillows. (Sorry. You should’ve known there might be a gross detail or two.)

Back to the clean up… Now my pantsless daughter is upstairs, so I call her downstairs, just to get her side of the story.

Me: Did you get poop on the book?
EK: No.
Me: Did you get poop on the pillows that are on the floor?
EK: No.
Me: Did you sit down before you came upstairs?
EK: …..

And now I’m freaking out about the BRAND NEW CARPET.

Trying to keep my cool, I remember she’s still pantsless. I start to help her with her underwear, and notice she doesn’t seem to have been cleaned up well. Then, I notice there’s a little poop on the inside of her shirt. “Oh well,”  I think. “Daddy must not have noticed it.” So I take her shirt off, and now I see the poop on her back. I start to clean it off, and a thought pops in my head. “If Daddy didn’t know all this had happened down here, I’m sure he didn’t wipe her hands off. HE DIDN’T WIPE HER HANDS OFF!” And then, I start freaking out about how many things she’s touched since the initial accident, and where all the poop might be and how I’m going to find it/clean it off, and then I’m all, “Screw it. It’s bath time.” J just happens to be lurking around the corner, trying to decipher and smell and the ruckus, so I toss him in, too. Clean babies, right? Right. Babies who are never wearing pull-ups during naptime ever again.  

Currently

Life is good, y’all. I’m at the end of my 26th week, and feeling really well! I’m tired, but hey- what’s new? Just a little exhaustion on the side of my normal life doesn’t seem that unusual. I’ll hit the third trimester next week, so I guess that’s why.

I already miss the warmer weather – here in NC we’ve had a little regression, between the rain and some cooler temperatures coming back in… and I’m not excited about it. I was LOVING wearing shorts and flip flops. Bring it back!

Anyway, I’m a day late, but I’m linking up with Becky at Choose Happy for her Currently link party. Join us! I love finding new blogs and hearing what you’re up to!

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Thankful for || a Hubby who let me sleep in this morning (yay!) and who is consistently the meal master at our house. He’s an amazing chef, who is creative and quick. What better two things could a chef be?! I also love that it typically means we have friends over a lot, to help us eat up the yums. It’s a win-win.

Baking || two batches of muffins on Sunday! One is technically a friend’s adaptation of an Against All Grain cupcake recipe, but because there’s no sugar and they’re gluten free, I’m calling them muffins and eating them for breakfast. The other batch was from Not So Desperate Housewife: Apple Pie Muffins. Let me tell you – also extremely delicious! The kids have been eating them up, too, which for me is a huge win.


Feeling || exhausted. I guess it’s pregnancy and two little crazies combined with a fierce desire to not be lazy and to still do all the things I like to do… which sometimes means I’m running around town all day and staying up late at night… aka not getting quite enough rest. Even if I’m not napping, I need to let myself have rests, and I’m not great at it. Here’s a little selfie of the big bump so you can see why I’m tiring a little more easily…


Needing || to slow down and chill out. This is piggybacking on my feelings… I’m also a little short-tempered right now, and every time I notice it, I hate it! But there are times that my mouth speaks before I’m able to stop it, or I let my feelings get the best of me. I know that stress is a little bit of it, going stir crazy on the days we’re mostly at home is a little bit of it, and I’m totally gonna blame a little bit on hormones. But I need to chill out – I know this. Doing it is just harder than admitting I need to do it.

Can’t believe || that my daughter is 3! We went yesterday for her 3 year check up, and she’s 30lbs, a little over 37 inches tall, and has only had one sick visit to the doctor in her life. I’m thankful she’s healthy, smart, and awesome, and if we could just get her potty trained, we’d be feeling 1000x better. I know… kids eventually potty train. But let’s be honest. If I’ve gotta buy diapers for three kids in July instead of just two, I may cry a little.


Well there’s my update! What’s going on with you currently?

Parenting Fail #87621: The Public Poopers

Yep, it’s that time again. Time for another parenting fail. Although it may not be as much of a fail as a “Oh my gosh did that actually happen?!”

I’ll set up the week for you – normally, my kids have (for months) pooped once a day, right when they get up in the morning. One morning this week, they had BOTH, within sheer minutes of each other, had the sort of poop where you throw away the pajamas and put them straight into the bathtub. Yes, I literally threw away both sets of pajamas that same morning because it was easier than cleaning it out. But after that day, it seemed that they were pooping – imagine me saying this out loud in my best accent – ALL. DAY. E’RY. DAY. My best friend suggested maybe they’re eating too much fruit and getting too much fiber. I say, eh, they’ve always eaten a ton of fruit. Who knows.

So anyway, both kids are basically to the point in their lives that I don’t keep extra changes of clothes for them. When they’re newborns and spitting up and pooping that liquid poop, you sorta have to. But at this point, EK isn’t wearing panties yet, still in Pull-Ups, so no worries there, and J’s biggest problem is his knees are always dirty. Who cares about that, right? So that being said, by some freak (beautiful) accident, I had an extra pair of pants in the diaper bag when we went out to dinner last night with a couple of friends.

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Blurry and devious J and Lauren. He’s thinking about what’s gonna happen in a minute…

 

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Blurry but adorable EK and Aida! This was pre-potty problems.

 

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What a yummy – and needed – margarita!

The kids, y’all, were angels. This place is pretty casual (it’s called The Porch Kitchen and Cantina… Tex-Mex, order at the counter, loud and bustling. We love it.) so the kids could make a little noise and no one was bothered. They ate really well, and were patient while we ate (which rarely happens, am I right?) so I’m thinking we’ve just had the perfect evening. Well, EK asks to go potty, so my friend Aida volunteers to take her. A few minutes after they left, J is squirming pretty awfully so I pull him out of the highchair and notice that he is stinky. So naturally I grab a diaper and wipes, and head to the bathroom. When I get there, Aida says, “Oh thank you! I didn’t know how to get help!” EK is on the changing table, no diaper, with poop on her legs. (Let’s all say a nice, “Poor Aida!”) Apparently, she had pooped a little in the potty – accidentally, of course – and it startled her, so she asked to get off the potty, and then did the rest in her Pull-Up. Then Aida didn’t have a new diaper or wipes to clean her up with. So I hand J to A, clean EK up and put her in the new diaper (the only diaper I had brought).

I take off J’s pants and realize the amount of poop he had was no joke. It’s on his clothes, shirt and pants. I send Aida for new clothes and a fresh diaper, and try to attack his mess. I literally think that I used most of the wipes cleaning up either J or the diaper station. (Yes I cleaned it up. No, you don’t have to worry about there being poop all over and it getting on your kid the next time you eat lunch there.) Aida comes back with the pants that were magically still in my bag, and his coat. Sorry, J, no shirt.

So he’s clean. EK is clean. I get back to the table, and the Hubby of the year looks at me and says, “Do you want me to take the kids home, and you girls can stay out and have a drink?”

Yes, Hubby. A thousand times yes.

 

Mountains or Molehills?

I don’t know if you know this about me, but I seriously love my family. Hubby and I have the best families on the planet. I’m sure yours is great, but… mine’s better.

Today, my sisters-in-law and I met our mother-in-law to plan out the holidays, everyone’s travel plans, and some dates we will all be together. Not only did we have a fun time at lunch, but decided to go shopping together! We then had so much fun shopping that when we needed to head home, we did so with the idea we’d get the brothers and our kids to have dinner together! So we packed up our families and met for dinner. Six adults, a toddler and three babies. It was a lot. We ate a lot. We spilled a lot. We laughed a lot. It was just a lot.

I had a choice at dinner tonight. I could have been stressed about the fact that in the first ten minutes, water, wine and green beans were all spilled. I could have been annoyed that J would only eat if he was sitting in my lap (aka if I was unable to eat). I could have been frustrated that right when I was able to eat a few bites, EK needed to go potty. But in fact, I chose fun. It was fun to pass the kids around the table, help ourselves to everyone else’s food, and make a big mess (for which we tipped generously, promise). I chose to be excited that my daughter told me she needed to go potty instead of peeing in her diaper! That was a miracle in itself!

When you have a choice between being frustrated, and giving in to the situation and making the best of it, making the right choice can be tough. I’m a high-strung person by nature (sorry, everyone) so I can make big deals out of basically anything. But it’s my constant goal – and sometimes struggle – to “Let It Go” (forgive the reference). I need lots of reminders, and I ask for a lot of help. My family bears with me in the midst of my sometimes-OCD. But I like myself more, and I’m sure everyone else does, too, if I can give in to the crazy and fun, instead of making a mountain out of a molehill.

Potty Training Update

Here’s a TMI post for you if I’ve ever written one…

Our potty training has been extremely lax. Our philosophy has been that when EK is ready, she will start making moves. So we bought a little potty, put her on it a couple of times each day, asked her several more times a day if she’d like to use it (usually receiving a “no” for a while), and otherwise let her tell us how interested she was – or wasn’t. She’s just now two and a half, so I haven’t been terribly worried about it, especially because in the past month or so she’s been doing a GREAT job.

((Side story: Hubby and I traveled with the kids to GA for my high school reunion. On the way back to NC, we were, uh, really tired, from the party the night before, so we just put the kids in the car in their pajamas, and hit the road. We stopped at a Subway for lunch and hydration and rest, and EK decided that she HAD to use the potty. At Subway. Gross. And guess what she was wearing? One piece zip-up pajamas. So I’m in the Subway bathroom, exhausted but giving my A+ parenting game, stripping my daughter to her skin to hold her over the toilet seat, that I’ve completely covered with toilet paper but I’m still not letting her touch. After she has successfully done her business, I’m trying to get her back in her (dry!) diaper and zip-up pajamas with no changing table… aka standing up… without letting anything touch the floor. Blerg. That was a long ten minutes. Now back to regularly scheduled posting.))

She’s started mentioning using the potty more, so we’ve started asking her a lot more often, and it’s been working! We keep a dry diaper a lot of the day, and use the potty several times, so we’re feeling great. On Thursday, she even (wait for it…) POOPED in the potty! And even my limited potty training experience tells me that’s a milestone!

Funny little thing about the past two weeks… EK has decided she no longer wants to use the little training potty. She only wants to sit on an actual toilet. Okay, great. Except she can’t really keep herself from falling in all that well. It takes a little more help from whoever is with her. But it’s pretty cute to see how proud of herself she is when she’s tinkling in “Mommy’s potty”. We’ve been rewarding her with a couple of jelly beans each time, so she’s extra excited to get those!

So now we’re to the point that we need to really buckle down and get her from using the potty most of the time to all the time. We just bought some Pull-Ups, so that should help. What are you suggestions for completing the process? And then, how do we wean her off the jellybeans?!