Tag Archives: Parenting

Things Toddlers Say 

Happy Tuesday, friends! I hope this little humor post finds you well, and enjoying your summer. We are traveling a lot over the next couple of weeks (a short trip and a longer trip) so you might hear a little less from us than normal. Anyway, here are today’s funnies! Enjoy!

Me: Is there anything special you’d like me to pray for?
J: Pray for it to be okay.
Me: What do you mean okay?
J: Okay is not whining or crying or being mad or sad. It’s just okay.
Me: Okay, I can do that.

Eating waffles with syrup…
EK: J, you have to lean over the table, like this. And also what’s important is to not get it on your clothes.

An ode to his cousin…
J: My cousin does a lot of nice things. He hugs and he kisses and he watches tv. He takes a good nap and eats dinner. He hugs and he kisses. Finley is so nice and does all those nice things.

J: Get out of there, you stupid bug!
EK: Don’t say stupid.
J: Well, I said it to the bug.


EK pointing to the store-brand coconut oil: I know where that came from! The grocery store! Because I see the letters for the store!

J: I love all of you so much! After we eat and I’m at home with you guys, I’ll give you all a wild hug!

EK: J, do you want to do manners at chick-a-lay? Like, I can teach you manners like safety because there will be a lot of children there.

J, talking about his blanket: Daddy gave me this when I was firteen years old yestaday. 

D’s new words: Cars (like when he means the movies, as in pointing at the tv and saying “wan Cars”), broken (he breaks a lot of stuff, ya know?), his own name (SO CUTE) and ‘chini (because his favorite veggie is zucchini)

Now, tell me: what are your kids saying these days?!

Things Toddlers Say 

Happy Tuesday, y’all! I hope your summer is off to a fantastic start! We have been enjoying ourselves outside, enjoying a visit from my mom, and planning a few trips. Anyway, here’s the good stuff… the funny stuff… the stuff you came here to read. Enjoy!

J with my mom…
Necie: I love you, and you are so much fun.
J: Do you know why I’m so much fun?
Necie: No, why?
J: Because I’m so handsome!
Me, upon hearing the story: And so humble!

EK, hands me my headband I wear when I run: Wanna go on a run together?
Me: Absolutely!
We ran a little, a quarter mile maybe, and then it was over. But it was cute while it lasted!

J: You remember when I locked myself outside and there was a robot?
EK: I think you’re just making that up.

J talking to our friend Tim…
J: I’m almost as old as you.
Tim: How old am I?
J: 15 months away.

J telling me about his afternoon: I went back and forf a lot today. From the couch to the floor to the couch to the floor to the couch to the floor to the couch to the floor.

J, getting out of bed way after bedtime: Hey mom?
Me: Aren’t you supposed to be in bed?
J: Hey mom? There was a creak in my room. And a scratch on my bed. But there was a creak but then I….. (me zoning out of the story)
Me: Okay, night night buddy.

My mom went to put J down for his nap…
J: Necie, when it’s time for me to wake up, I want you to still be here.
Necie: I will be here; I promise.
J: You can sleep between my parents. They will make room for you. But they only have two pillows.
Necie: Okay, buddy. Thanks!

Me in the car: Do you guys want to be my helpers when we get home?
EK: Yeah! J, let’s clean everything for mom!
Me: I meant help me cook dinner but that works too!

EK: J, did you move these flowers?!
J: No.
EK: Well those are MY hens and chicks. Don’t move them.
J: Well I just wanted to share your hens and chicks.
EK: J! Do NOT pick my hens and chicks ever again!
(Pardon the weeds, by the way.)

D: Dirt?
Me: Yeah, you’re covered in dirt.

J: I know Chinese!
Me: What Chinese words do you know?
J: I know food Chinese! (as in the names of Chinese dishes, which is true)

J: Did anyone think my burp was funny?
The room: *crickets*

Things Toddlers Say 

Hey y’all and happy Tuesday! Thanks for dropping in to read the sillies!


EK explaining “armpit” to J: Right here. It helps you be strong and hug people. That’s why they call it that.

EK: I don’t want to get any babies because I don’t want to go to the hospital and see the doctors and them not get my baby out and my body not be good.
Me: They can get your babies out safely and your body will go back to normal after a while. (White lie?)
EK, after a pause: okay. I’ll take a baby.

We had been talking about volcanoes…
Hubby: Would you like to go see a volcano?
EK: Yeah. But if it’s unerupting in the map then I don’t want to go.

How I know we’ve been watching Mulan a lot…
J, playing with blocks: Can you help me make a China?
Five minutes later…

I kissed J goodnight…
J: Ouch! You actually just hit my boohoo on my wip.
Me: I’m sorry, babe. I didn’t mean to.
J: It’s okay. You actually just gave me a big kiss.

When we go to the lake with my inlaws, EK sleeps in a little daybed in her grandfathers room. She got up to use the bathroom in the night, and asked him: Is it okay if I flush the potty? I don’t want to wake Annie (her grandmother).

EK: I like Gon Gon’s food better than yours. But I still like yours.
Me: Well, Gon Gon’s food is the best, so that doesn’t hurt my feelings.

All throughout the grocery store…
EK and J, singing: Let’s go to the poooooottyyyyyy! Let’s go to the pooooooottyyyyy!
Me, to everyone else: They don’t actually have to go. I checked. I’m sorry. They’re usually so polite.

Batman Confusion:
J: He drives his Batmocar. And my name is Batmo-Pudding!

EK, with the jokes: If you put a real dog in the fire, he’ll be a hot dog!
Hubby: You should never put a live animal in the fire.

Things Toddlers Say 

Happy Tuesday! Summer is almost here! We are preparing for warm weather and sunshine at our house – how about you? Hope the funnies find you well and not too busy as school ends… Enjoy!

First thing in the morning…
D: Hi!
Hubby: Hi!
D: I poop!
Hubby: You sure did…

J: Look at my robots!
Me: How many eyes do your robots have?
J: This ones got a hundred and this one has two!

EK, giving the above plate of food to me: I know that looks like a regular egg, but it’s actually an Australia egg.

EK: ACHOO!
Me: Who sneezed?
EK: It was just a tree outside.
Me: A tree sneezed?
EK: Yeah! How magical is that?!

J: I can’t reach!
Me: Be there in one second!
J: Okay, I’ll count to one. Five, four, three, two, one!

Overheard from the back of the car…
J: We can’t see Jesus because he’s hiding in our hearts.

EK, running up to me, crying: Mom! I falled while we were playing risbeef!
She meant frisbee. And I was trying so hard not to laugh at her pain.

EK got in our bed at 3:00am and after several minutes of no one sleeping…
Me: It’s time to go back and get in your own bed.
EK: Will you carry me?
Me: *picks her up and heads for the stairs*
EK: I just couldn’t sleep because you and Daddy kept moving your legs around.
Me: You know that we didn’t ask you to get in our bed, right?

EK: Ladies and gentlemen! The dangerous volcano is interrupting five minutes! Please stay away so you do not get hurt! Five, four, three, two, one!

J: I found a microbot (from Big Hero 6) on EK’s purse!

Things Toddlers Say 

Happy Tuesday! Here we are again, celebrating the little hilarities of life with toddlers. I’ve got a bunch of funnies from J again this week – enjoy!

 

Me: J, would you like this Avengers shirt?
J: Well, I doooo like it, but I’d really like something else.

J reading through Dr. Seuss’s Wacky Wednesday: Woah, woah, woah. That is NOT good.

D to J, who happened to be in trouble: No! No, J! ‘Pank! No!
Me and Hubby: ……


J, above: I have a dino-snore on my shirt! Like Daddy snores!

D: *cries*
EK, before anyone says anything: I didn’t do anything!

J: I feel the taste of it, Mom! What is it?!
Me: ….an orange…?

J trying to say ambulance: ambwe, ayam, ambleeyance?

J ran upstairs during bedtime…
Hubby: Where’d you run off to?
J: I just gotted to get some sippin’ water.

J, looking at my necklace: Did your husband get that for you?

J has been talking to his aunt Holly for a while. I come back in the room and he asks me: How many molars do you have, Mom?

J and me, using the blender and he says: It looks like a whirlpool!
Me: Wow. That was a really good word.

J, talking about my running leggings: You look so cute in those black pants, Mom!
Me: *winning*

Annie to EK: We need to talk about something very important before our naps.
EK: That Jesus is alive?

D’s new favorite words: Bok bok (like a chicken) and Hei Hei, Manana (Moana), and Maaaai (Maui). He loves the movie Moana.

J told me he wanted a banana. I told him wait just a sec. There was a step stool underneath this:EK: Nella, the princess knight is who I am!
Me: I am literally the proudest I’ve ever been.

Well, there ya go, Tuesday. I hope it brightened your day! Do you have some silly sayings of your kids that you could share??

A Good Friday Prayer

Tonight, I helped lead worship at my church’s Good Friday service, as I’ve done for the past few years. It’s a truly beautiful service, somber, quiet, slow… but not without hope. Our pastors do an incredible job of planning this evening full of dramatic lighting, powerful songs, and the last words of Jesus as he prepared to give his life, and as he hung on the cross. It’s haunting.

When I got home, I was still in the mood the service had left me in. I was lost in thought, as I had been on and off all day. Good Friday has always been a sobering day for me. But as I put my youngest son to bed, I started to sing him one of the songs we had sung in the service. It’s appropriately called “Passion Song”, written by some friends of our worship pastor. (Click that link. It will bless your soul to hear it.) It’s based on John’s view of how Jesus’s last week went down. The pastor who spoke just before the song presented it perfectly, emphasizing how Jesus was John’s very best friend, the only person who had ever known him so completely. Here are the words, so you can see the powerful emotion packed in them…

I was with Him when He rode into town
And the crowds gathered round Him like a King
Their smiling faces joined a sea of branches waving
Though they were masquerading in the end

And my heart rose in my throat
When I heard them sing
Hosanna in the highest
Oooh oooooh oh

We went upstairs broke the bread and drank the wine
From the only living vine that we would taste
And I watch them take Him up the mountainside
Where He was crucified though innocent
And they mocked Him and cursed Him with their mouths
And told Him to come down if He was God

And my heart broke in my chest
When I heard Him say
Forgive them it is finished
Oooh oooooh oh

I remember in the garden
When He sweat like drops of blood
And how He begged the Father
Just to let Him pass the cup
I can still feel the anguish
When they pierced Him in the side
And how the ground beneath us shook
Upon the very moment that He died
Oooh ooh oh oh oh

Three days later we found an empty grave
And the stone was rolled away where He had been

Tears of joy streamed down my face
When the angel said
Oh fear not He is risen
Oh fear not He is risen
Oooh ooh ooh oooh oh oh oooh

You can see how this song would be lingering in my psyche, right? So I’m singing it to my son, as I’m settling him in for bed. And when I finally wipe the (my) tears away, and get to his goodnight prayer, I began to pray like always, and for some reason, I was led to utter the words, “…and thank You for giving Your Son. I could never give my son.”

And I cried some more.

You see, the sacrifice is beyond what any one of us could do. In the Old Testament, Abraham was told to sacrifice his son. Whether he would’ve (or could’ve) actually gone through with it we’ll never know. There was a ram in the thicket, and God was preparing, even then, to give His very own son to save the world. Jesus willingly gave his life to pave the way for us to enter into fellowship with his Father. One of our pastors this evening titled it “a beautiful exchange”. His life for ours. What else could possibly be a better exchange for us?

Things Toddlers Say 

HEY! It’s Wednesday, but I’m allowed to be a day late for TTS on vacation, right? It’s our spring break and we’re doing mountainy things! So here is a little humor for your week, and sorry it’s a bit late. Enjoy!

D was trying to climb a rope ladder at the playground…
J: You can do it, D! I know you can!

Hubby and I hear J talking (he was “reading aloud”) downstairs after bedtime…
Hubby: Hey, why is your light on? You’re supposed to be sleeping.
J: Go away, Dad. I just wanna do what I wanna do.

At bath time, EK pitched a fit about getting in the tub. When she finally got in, she said to J: Please don’t splash me. I’m just so sad.

EK wanted me to sing some Taj Mahal at bedtime the other night, and I told her I didn’t know the words. So she sang it.

 

Wise words…
J: After a day and another day, things get old.

Talking about her loose teeth…
EK: I sleep on my eyes so I don’t swallow them.

EK, randomly: Oh, mom. The scissors are in my room because there was a lollipop and I needed them to open it.

EK: Can I have another hot dog and some more of those little chickens?
Me: Those were tater tots.

EK’s picture of my new hair. Spot on. 

Now, I know her drawing is crumpled but I had to show you that “ballerina EK” is shaped a lot like ballerina Olivia. 

J: How many are you?
Me: 31.
J: How many are you, Dad?
Hubby: 31.
J: Two 31s?! You must be twins!
Me: Nope nope nope.

J: Mom! The red is light! Oops. I mean, the light is red!

J: You know why I threw rocks at the river? I was tryna feed it.

Hope you enjoyed our funnies! Have a great week!