Things Toddlers Say

Hello and happy Tuesday! After a fun (and admittedly emotional) weekend of the tiniest member of our family turning ONE, I’m ready for some humor! Hope you enjoy these funnies!

EK on public toilets: These aren’t so loud as blenders.

Me: Let’s get you some shorts, buddy.
J: I don’t want some shorts. I’ve got some legs.

EK approaches J to apologize for biting him (I know- it was a whole thing).
J: I’m sorry you bited me on the arm. Can you give me a hug and a kiss now?
EK, turning to Hubby: Did you hear that?
Hubby: I did. Why don’t you do that?
EK: I’m sorry, J. (Gives him a hug.)

EK has a gown with a bunch of female superheroes on it. She came upstairs after getting ready for bed while we had friends over…
EK to the room at large: There’s no boys in my nightgown. (Not a typo.)
Sam: Keep it that way.

J, all day long: Can you say, “Yes I can have some candy?”
Me: *giant eye roll*

J, picking up a phone: Hello, Lucy. It’s Gru.

EK singing “Jesus Loves Me”
J: Stop singing, EK!
Me: It’s okay if EK is singing.
J: (Sigh!) It’s okay if you sing the Bible, EK.

This very concerned helper…J: Mom! I’m fixing Diesel! (Because that plastic wrench is actually going to help whatever the problem is.)

EK: I don’t like ranch (dressing).
J: I do!

My friend sent me this gem. They were on a chair lift at a theme park…
S: Look how high we are! It looks like we’re a hundred years old!

While EK was with her grandmother…
EK sees the picture of herself as a baby, in a bikini at the beach.
EK exclaims: Oh how cute!
Annie: Do you know who it is?
EK: No.
Annie: It’s you!
EK puts her hand to her chest and says: Oh… that makes me so happy – I am going to cry!

J has had several booboos recently, and calls Band-Aids “ban-dangs”. I die every time.

So what are your kiddos talking about? Any hilarious mispronunciations?

2 thoughts on “Things Toddlers Say”

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