Category Archives: pregnancy

mommyhood, pregnancy, women

10 More Tips for Soon-to-Be Moms

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On the heels of my first post of 10 tips for all of you soon-to-be moms, I’ve written a second list of tips! I hope these are super helpful, but remember: what worked for me doesn’t always work for everyone, and you should do whatever works best for you, your baby, and your family! These are just suggestions!

Yes. That is my bump, as of right now!

1. Don’t buy maternity underwear. I say this not necessarily because it’s a waste of money. It probably isn’t. But you’d wear it for a few months, and then just pack it away or trash it, right? A better idea is to just stretch out your regular underwear, and then after the baby is born, hit up Vicky’s semi-annual sale and treat yo’self to some brand new undies you won’t have to let go of in a few months. The options are cuter in regular sizes, anyway.

2. When getting nursing attire, you may need two sizes. For the first two months or so, my breasts were huge, and needed to be available all the time. After that, I started to shrink down a little (it was NOT sad) and could start wearing things that weren’t nursing friendly every once in a while because they were nursing more predictably and not as often. I got all my nursing tank tops and nursing bras at Target, and there are several brands and styles I liked just fine.

3. When offered help, have it continue through (at least) the first two months. It seems like you’d get a rhythm and not need as much help after the first couple of weeks, right? Ha! Well, you do. But your adrenaline wears off, the lack of sleep builds up, and you’re dragging even more than you were when you said you’d never been so tired. So if you’ve got a friend setting up a meal calendar, have it continue through two months, even if that means it starts a little later. If you’ve got someone asking if you need a break to take a shower or a nap, say yes, and ash them if they’d like to do it again. It feels silly to take them up on things like that, but hey – they offered!

4. Use the lactation consultant at the hospital! When you’re there after delivery for however many hours, and that consultant comes by, let her take a good look at what’s going on, let her get in your (and the baby’s) business, and ask her ALL THE QUESTIONS. It’s awkward. It feels weird to have your boobs out and her squeezing and whatever, but just do it. You learn tricks, and you can even get her number for a follow-up phone call later. It’s the best!

5. Have Daddy help out. I don’t mean just with cooking and cleaning and yada yada. I mean with the baby. He needs to bond, too, so have him help out at night if possible (if he’s not working the next morning) or have him take the early morning shift, so you can catch some more z’s before your day really gets going. It’ll be really special time between Daddy and baby, and it’ll be heaven for you.

6. Try not to get too worked up. I know this sounds ridiculous, but if you’re in the middle of a crying jag, or a nursing strike, or just plain isn’t happy with anything, it’s tempting to get really stressed and freak out. I’ve been there tons of times, when you just feel useless. I got a great piece of advice. Put the baby in the crib, walk away, and tag out with Daddy, or just give yourself a minute. If what you were trying wasn’t helping, getting stressed isn’t either. Your baby can sense that you’re stressed, and that doesn’t help them calm down. However you can get a minute to calm down, that’s the best way to calm the baby.

7. Be flexible with sleeping arrangements. Something different that you thought might be what works for you. When I had EK, I had planned on keeping her in the room in a bassinet until she started sleeping better, just so I wouldn’t have to walk around the house in the middle of the night. Turns out, Hubby and I couldn’t sleep because we were listening to every tiny squeak and each little squirm, wondering if she was waking up, if she was hungry, if she needed something. I couldn’t ever get to sleep! We spent two nights like that, and moved her to her own room, because we couldn’t get any rest. Unless everyone’s getting sleep with whatever arrangement you are trying, you might try something different.

8. Create a bedtime routine. I went into depth about our bedtime routine in a recent post here, but having a few things that are the same every night will help baby know when bedtime is, and go down a little easier. For instance, clean diaper (bath when they’re ready for a daily bath), clean jammies/sleep sack, swaddled (if you’re swaddling), read a book, sing a song, feed her, and lay her down before she’s all the way asleep.

9. Go ahead and choose your pediatrician. The hospital will ask you just after your baby is born who you will be working with (what office, anyway) so go ahead and visit a few before you have the baby. The pediatrician on call will do a visit in the hospital for the both of you, so meet a few of the doctors if you can, and you might see a familiar face! Most offices do tours and meet-and-greets, so call a few and ask around! For us, we love the option of a Saturday clinic, the option of lots of different doctors, but being able to see our favorite nine times out of ten, and the fact that they all treat our kids like royalty. What can I say? They love us.

10. Get some sleep before the baby comes. I got all sorts of advice about I should do before EK got here: go on vacation, get my nails done, get my hair cut, have a girls’ night, have a massage, have sex with my husband (how do you think we got pregnant?), prepare the nursery, wash the baby clothes, go to the movies, and a thousand more things. The best piece was to get sleep. I took naps, slept as much as possible all day and night, and I felt super rested when the baby came. It was the best possible scenario.

What else would you add to this list? How have you prepared for a baby?

mommyhood, pregnancy, women

8 Ways to Prepare Yourself for Delivery

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Delivering a baby is the biggest, most important, most intimidating thing you might ever do. If you’re a newbie at it (and even if you’re not) there are a few things you can do to help the day (or night) go more smoothly. And since I’m gearing up to have a third go at it in July, it’s good for me to go back over it. Here are some tips based on my personal experience with my two kiddos.

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After delivery family photo ❤

1. The Hospital Bag. This can be as important as you make it. Here’s my experience: I packed too much for EK. I packed too much for J. I’m considering not packing one this time. Ha! I’m kidding, but a little bit serious. I haven’t ever showered at the hospital (how much nicer is your shower at home, right?) so I haven’t used anything but the toothbrush, chapstick, and my glasses (I typically wear contacts) in the toiletries department. I wore a light robe, nursing tank, and stretchy shorts (think high school basketball shorts) when I got to my room. I used the hospital’s everything for the baby: diapers, wipes, nose sucker (what’s that thing even called, am I right?), blankets (with the exception of a muslin swaddle I brought), and hat. Everything is kinda covered in new baby fluids (read: pee, meconium, spit up, colostrum, etc.) so you don’t truly need an outfit until the “going home outfit” you picked out. Speaking of that outfit… if you’re like me and you have big babies, or if you don’t know what you’ll get because it’s your first, then pick one in newborn size and one in three month size. J couldn’t fit in most of his newborn clothes even though he was just hours old. Because hospital food is “eh” and nursing burns one million calories an hour, I packed a few non-perishable snacks (Luna bars/Larabars, crackers, etc) and bottles of water, my pillow, and my laptop. This is crucial because I want to stream Netflix while I’m not sleeping, am I right? And one last thing: pack an empty bag inside your bag so you can fill it up with hospital freebies like diapers, wipes, maxi pads, nose sucker, etc. They’ll give you more of all of those before you head out.

2. The car seat. I know, this seems like a no-brainer, but go ahead and install it in your car. That way, you don’t have to think about it when your water breaks. It won’t even be on the radar. And you don’t want to be reading the manual to figure out what LATCH is sitting in the hospital parking lot. (Side note: neither does your partner.)

3. Ask for all the drinks and ice you want while you’re in labor. For me, I was excited beyond belief by the perfectly crunchy pellet ice at my hospital, and the fact that I could drink Coca-Cola up until I started pushing. Someone (I’m sorry, dear nurses) would come by to… ahem… empty my bladder whenever I was feeling like I needed to go. And as dry as the hospital is, I was drinking a ton.

4. It’s gonna be messy. For me, it wasn’t as bad as I’ve heard it could be, but either way you and whoever else attends the actual birth will probably get sweaty at the very least. The lights are bright, the tension can be high, and at least one of you is working! You’re probably wearing a hospital gown, but bring a change of clothes for Daddy, too, because it could get a little messy. Especially if you’re like I was with your first, and you’re a little nervous to be there by yourself and you’d like him to stay with you.

5. Rest. Don’t try to do too much during your hospital stay. Keep to the bed as best you can, especially the first few hours. I know that after having J,  I popped up, my adrenaline kicked in, and I wanted to go, go, go. But if you have an epidural, or if you have some tearing (It’s okay! I tore and I lived through it!) you’ll not want to overestimate yourself. The first three or four times you need to go to the bathroom, use someone (Dad, nurse, anyone!) to help you to and from the toilet. You may be a little lightheaded.

6. Make sure you actually need to go to the hospital in the first place. Always call your doctor before you head to the hospital. I’ve had several friends with “false” labor and “pre” labor who show up at the hospital and get sent home, or sent to the mall to walk, or whatever. Your contractions have to be pretty long and pretty close together before they’ll want to keep you, and even then if you aren’t dilated at all, they might still send you away. That being said, if your water breaks, GO!

7. Get on the same page with Daddy before you start labor. It’s always nice to know what he’s up for and what he isn’t. Some dads don’t want to see it all happen, and in the heat of the moment isn’t a good time to find out. Ask him beforehand whether he’d like to sit by your head and hold your hand, or if he’d like to be a more in-depth part of what’s going on. If he’s gonna hit the floor at the sight of blood, maybe holding your hand (or the waiting room, ha!) is the best place. Hubby and I didn’t talk about it before, but he ended up being a big part of my having a successful labor/delivery with EK, and so he was very involved again the second time. Bless him for not knowing how much of a part until the actual day. Give your Dad the choice and a heads up – just because it’s a nice thing to do.

8. Do those Kegels! It’s never too late. Any amount of Kegels is better than zero. I think it also helps you learn how to push. A cousin of mine told me that during her first child’s delivery, she pushed the wrong way for over an hour. Talk about a lot of effort and pain for no gain. Kegels help you familiarize yourself with the muscles you’ll be using to have the baby, in addition to their normal benefits (getting back to normal more quickly, etc).

Well, there are eight of my most helpful tips for preparing for your delivery! If you’re expecting, good luck with your pregnancy, labor and delivery! If you aren’t, log this for when you are – it might help you out! If you’ve been through it once, or twice, or many times, do you have anything to add?

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus, pregnancy, siblings

I’ll Miss Just Having Two.

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus! 

I AM SO EXCITED about this third child we’re going to welcome into our family. We prayed for him (a lot… that story is here.) and have been waiting and waiting for him to arrive. We knew we wanted him from the get-go. We’ve always said we wanted three or four kids, so we knew he was in our plan. We were not (all that) surprised when I found out I was pregnant, and we have not been a bit disappointed since finding out. Now. That being said…

I’m going to miss just having two kiddos.


Today, the three of us were on a walk. We were, as always, in my double jogger (Love it. Gotta have it. Couldn’t have lived my life this far without it.) just cruising the neighborhood with snacks and water bottles, talking about the color of the car that just drove by, the kinds of foliage we passed, and enjoying the not-too-hot-yet sunshine. I had a thought as we rounded the corner towards home: Our days doing this are numbered. Not necessarily because we won’t be able to stroll around the neighborhood any more. But because I’ll either be carrying one on my back/front, or letting EK walk beside the stroller (ie: freaking out that she’ll be running into the street at any moment) or having someone else to come with us to push another single stroller or push mine while I wear the baby. Hubby goes on walks with us fairly often, but usually it’s special time for the three of us. Soon, for a little while at least, our walks will be cut short because baby D will need to nurse, or he’ll have a blowout, or I will just plain be too tired for an hour-long walk like today’s.

I know – this seems like a first world problem, along with things like “Do I need to buy a different car to fit all those child seats?” and “It’s going to be tough getting out the door with three jackets and sets of shoes to put on.” I know that these phases are short. The time with these kids being so young and needy will fly, and I may even look back and wish it was still here.

But my walk this afternoon with my two amazing, curious, adorable sweeties shed some light on my feelings and changed how I’ll look at these last 12 weeks before my due date. I won’t try to rush through them. I won’t spend all my time preparing for the next baby – like I would have been able to anyway, right? I’ll be thankful for the time that I can lavish on my eldest two. I’ll cherish the one-on-one time I have with J while EK is at preschool. I’ll enjoy the long walks with just the two of them. I’ll love the girls’ lunch dates I like to have with just EK, or sometimes a girlfriend or two. I’ll love playing on the floor, amidst the giggles and tickles, right before bedtime. I’ll do everything I can with my two before I’ll be splitting my attention with another little sweetie who needs me.

mommyhood, my journey as a mother, pregnancy, siblings

My Journey as a Mother: Family Planning (or Lack Thereof)

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I’ve been inspired the past couple of weeks to write about our family planning. Or lack thereof. There have been several articles I’ve read on the subject, about opinions on child spacing, and in the light of #mommitment I wanted to share my story (lest y’all think I’m crazy for having my three under three and a half).  

You see, when Hubby and I decided we were ready to start having children, we did what any couple’s first step is: I stopped taking the pill. This was January of 2011. We’d been married for a little over a year and a half, and we knew we wouldn’t immediately get pregnant, but we thought we’d see what happened.

What happened was a few months of “not not trying”, where we didn’t really plan out days or anything, but we knew we’d “pulled the goalie”. Then, after the few months of that, we started actually trying, planning days to try to conceive, and keeping track of every single thing – did you know there were APPS FOR THAT?! After a few months of that process and no baby, I’d spent way too much on pregnancy tests and not enough on newborn-sized onesies, so I tried a new approach. I started taking my basal resting temperature. That meant that right as I woke up, I would take my temperature before getting out of bed, record it, and wait for it to one day spike – ever so slightly-  which meant I’d be ovulating. Well, that day came, and so obviously we tried to conceive. Then the next morning, and the nine or ten after that, my temperature never went back down. I basically thought the system was busted. I can’t be ovulating every day. Well, I wasn’t. Because I was pregnant.

When EK was born 10 months later, I was nursing, and while I know that nursing isn’t birth control, I didn’t go back on any sort of birth control when she was born. Hubby and I figured the Lord had a plan, and we were good with whatever it was. My cycle didn’t come back until four months post-partum, and I breastfed until six months. We weren’t trying to get pregnant, but we obviously weren’t preventing it, either.

In March of the next year, when EK was 11 months old, I found out I was pregnant again. We were thrilled, and couldn’t wait to start telling our families, but before we even got to that point, I was cramping and bleeding, and ended up miscarrying at 7 weeks. I was told that I would start my cycle back in 4-12  weeks (Really? What sort of help is that?!) and not to try to get pregnant again until then. I guess they were basically telling me not to rush back into it, and let my body get back to normal. Well, I was obviously emotionally wrecked and not really in a hurry, at least until my body did what it needed to do. A couple of months later, I was out with some girlfriends, who asked me about it. I started counting the weeks, and realized I was at 13. They hadn’t said it would be any longer than 12 weeks (although, how accurate is it, truly?) so just for good measure, I went home and took a test. Positive! Boom.

This time, I had no inkling how far along I was… I’d had to period to reference my ovulation and conception. It wasn’t until my ultrasound at TEN AND A HALF WEEKS that I’d have the baby before the year was out. How’s that for a crazy few months, and an enormous blessing at the end of them?!

After J was born at the end of that year (2013), I nursed him for eight wonderful months, and when he weaned himself, my cycle started back. I had exactly two periods, and found out I was pregnant again. And here I am! 27 weeks with my third little miracle.

Now, did I plan it out this way? No. Did I try to plan differently? No. Am I aware how blessed I am to be fertile and healthy and blessed with three children in four years? Absolutely. I know everyone is not this way – and especially on timing, wouldn’t necessarily want to be this way. Are we often a bit of a madhouse around here? Yes. Do I expect it to get much better? Not for a while. But do I love my little tinies, how close they are together, and how happy they make me? 100%.

I do get some comments and looks at the grocery store when people see me with my littles, and obviously another on the way. “You sure had them close together!” and “You know what causes that, right?” are things I hear a lot. Yes, they are obviously close together, thankyouverymuch. Yes, I CLEARLY know what causes that. I’m a grown woman, amIright? So while I didn’t try to ensure my kids would be mistaken for Irish twins, or likely straight up triplets when they hit high school or so, I wasn’t against having them all in diapers at the same time, or all in college at the same time. I’ll survive. And they will thrive.

food, home, mommyhood, pregnancy, random thoughts

Currently

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Life is good, y’all. I’m at the end of my 26th week, and feeling really well! I’m tired, but hey- what’s new? Just a little exhaustion on the side of my normal life doesn’t seem that unusual. I’ll hit the third trimester next week, so I guess that’s why.

I already miss the warmer weather – here in NC we’ve had a little regression, between the rain and some cooler temperatures coming back in… and I’m not excited about it. I was LOVING wearing shorts and flip flops. Bring it back!

Anyway, I’m a day late, but I’m linking up with Becky at Choose Happy for her Currently link party. Join us! I love finding new blogs and hearing what you’re up to!

currently button

Thankful for || a Hubby who let me sleep in this morning (yay!) and who is consistently the meal master at our house. He’s an amazing chef, who is creative and quick. What better two things could a chef be?! I also love that it typically means we have friends over a lot, to help us eat up the yums. It’s a win-win.

Baking || two batches of muffins on Sunday! One is technically a friend’s adaptation of an Against All Grain cupcake recipe, but because there’s no sugar and they’re gluten free, I’m calling them muffins and eating them for breakfast. The other batch was from Not So Desperate Housewife: Apple Pie Muffins. Let me tell you – also extremely delicious! The kids have been eating them up, too, which for me is a huge win.


Feeling || exhausted. I guess it’s pregnancy and two little crazies combined with a fierce desire to not be lazy and to still do all the things I like to do… which sometimes means I’m running around town all day and staying up late at night… aka not getting quite enough rest. Even if I’m not napping, I need to let myself have rests, and I’m not great at it. Here’s a little selfie of the big bump so you can see why I’m tiring a little more easily…


Needing || to slow down and chill out. This is piggybacking on my feelings… I’m also a little short-tempered right now, and every time I notice it, I hate it! But there are times that my mouth speaks before I’m able to stop it, or I let my feelings get the best of me. I know that stress is a little bit of it, going stir crazy on the days we’re mostly at home is a little bit of it, and I’m totally gonna blame a little bit on hormones. But I need to chill out – I know this. Doing it is just harder than admitting I need to do it.

Can’t believe || that my daughter is 3! We went yesterday for her 3 year check up, and she’s 30lbs, a little over 37 inches tall, and has only had one sick visit to the doctor in her life. I’m thankful she’s healthy, smart, and awesome, and if we could just get her potty trained, we’d be feeling 1000x better. I know… kids eventually potty train. But let’s be honest. If I’ve gotta buy diapers for three kids in July instead of just two, I may cry a little.


Well there’s my update! What’s going on with you currently?

mommyhood, my journey as a mother, pregnancy, women

I’m Making a Mommitment.

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Lately I’ve realized that my social media newsfeeds are overtaken by things about parenting. Blogs giving me suggestions, companies trying to sell me their products, friends posting questions, opinions, and pictures of or related to their kids… I’m totally inundated by “mom stuff”.

Another thing I’ve noticed is that a lot of these articles, products and opinions contain labels about a parent’s style. How the mom delivers her baby. How she nourishes her baby. How the parents help their babies sleep. How the parents plan to transport, potty train, educate, and discipline their offspring. There are a thousand ways to rear a child, and no one has any business telling other people they’re doing it wrong, or to try to force their way on someone else. We’re all doing the best we can. This video is a great one along those lines, I think:

I wrote a post a couple of weeks ago about helping mothers (especially expectant mothers and new mothers) feel celebrated and loved. Well, this is part of that. Melissa at One Mother to Another (she’s the best!) brought a movement to my attention. It’s a #mommitment for us to all make to each other, to support mothers, one and all. Whatever our similarities or differences, to set them aside and support each other’s efforts to be the best parents we can, in the best way we know how.

My #mommitment to you:

I pledge to accept you as you are, no matter your situation, choices, or style. I promise to support you, in any way I can, no matter whether we made the same choices for our little ones, or if we couldn’t be more different. I vow to be in your corner, defend you, stand alongside you, laugh with you, cry for you, be happy for you, or mourn with you. I will listen to you respectfully, and respond with kindness. I will share my opinion with grace and understanding. I will not judge you, condemn you, or scoff at you. I will not label you or assume things about you by the choices you have made. I will celebrate your special journey as a mother.

I will do these things because we are bound by an invisible tie. We know some things about each other without being told. We have similarities that cannot be chosen – they are inherent. We are mothers, and we should stand together. I know that sometimes, I will need these things from you, too. I have often asked questions, needed advice, and just plain needed to vent. We all need each other, and building barriers because of styles and “labels” doesn’t help any mother, or any child. 

So there it is. A commitment to you, fellow moms, to be supportive, loving, kind and helpful. To NOT be judging, belittling, unkind, or harsh. I’m passionate about ending the mom wars, and spreading the love and support to all moms. Hear me? Every. Single. One.

mommitment

If you’re interested in reading about the mom behind the movement, visit Julie’s page Next Life No Kids and read about her journey, and her movement. You can also find her and the mom movement on Facebook and Twitter. Join us, and make your mommitment to end mom wars with compassion and support.

everyday mom link up

mommyhood, pregnancy, women

Giving a REALLY Good Baby Shower Gift

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If you’re like me, at 29 years old, you’ve been to a billion baby showers, possibly including your own. You’ve known young moms and old, had at least one close friend have a baby, and needed to hit up the local baby store for a set of bottles or a sweet, monogrammed blanket.

This is like a mini-throwback from my shower before EK was born. These are my college girlfriends!

That being said, those gifts are sweet: bottles, blankets, teethers, etc. They’re thoughtful, useful, and probably from the mom’s registry. But there are a few things that, as a mama who’s attended some baby showers, I’ve learned are really great gifts that new parents love, even if they aren’t quite as cute in the gift wrap.
On the heels of the success of my “10 Tips for Soon-To-Be Moms“, here are a few unconventional but awesome baby shower gift ideas.

1. Stain remover. I really love the BabyGanics Stain Remover (find it on Diapers.com) personally, but Shout and OxyClean also are winners. I always include a bottle of the BabyGanics with whatever I get the new mama.

2. Clothes in bigger sizes. Yes, those newborn outfits are cute, and yes, the tinier they are, the cuter, somehow. BUT there are two reasons to stay away from the tiniest clothes you see: 1. Everyone else is buying them, too. While newborns probably have lots of costume changes, no mama needs 59 outfits for the first week of the baby’s life. 2. Babies grow really, really fast. And some babies, like my J, never wear newborn sized clothes anyway. He was a little long and a little porky for most of the newborn-sized clothes I had, so he jumped straight to three months size.  I’d love to have gotten more cute clothes in nine months size and up, even all the way to 3T! Kids always need play clothes, and if you’re worried about sizes for the right seasons, just get t-shirts and leggings (girls) or jeans because those are can be worn in every season.

3. Restaurant gift certificates. Whether for a date night before the baby comes, or after, or for take out during the first few weeks where life is a blur, providing a meal is always a good thing.

4. Laundry detergent, dish soap, or hand sanitizer. These are great gifts, because we go through TONS of it in the baby’s first month or two. Dreft or any natural brand (insert second BabyGanics plug) is great for laundry, natural dish soaps (Honest Company, Mrs. Meyer’s, etc) for paci/bottle/teether washing, and hand sanitizer for every single soul who walks through your front door. Sorry germs, ain’t nobody got time for that.

5. Diapers or wipes.  Some mamas have a huge bias when it comes to these (brands, cloth diapering, etc) but it’s easy to ask them what their plan is, and offer to contribute to it. Even if you’re cloth diapering, it can be an expensive undertaking. And just like clothes, diaper sizes change often as well, so don’t get two jumbo cases of newborn sizes… go all the way up to 4 or 5 if you want. I promise. They’ll be used.

6. Don’t be afraid to go gender neutral. This is important especially for bigger ticket items. It’s super cute that your baby girl’s carseat is covered in pink flowers, but when your second baby is a boy, and you have to buy a new one, that’s a big bummer. This also applies,  in my book, to things like burp cloths, muslin swaddles, crib sheets, bath towels, socks (Yeah, I said it. What’s wrong with white?), and toys. I know, you can get teethers and noisemakers that are all princessy, or all have trucks on them, but why can’t you just get the ones covered in giraffes?

7. Baby food pouches. For the most part, these things stay good a long while, and they’re great even for moms who want to make their own baby food, because you can find things that might be out of season, or that are a little more expensive fresh for the same price – not to mention they are GREAT for being on the go. Choose simple, though, and get pouches that have only one or two ingredients (just peaches, or plain ol’ applesauce) instead of blends, and always go organic. (I like the Plum Organics brand a lot, just by the way.)

8. Housecleaning service. I don’t think it’s too forward to pay for a few hours of a housecleaning service so that mama can worry not about her floors and toilets during the first month or two post-partum. She’ll just thank you later.

9. Wine, booze, coffee, and chocolate. It may sound silly, but after nine months without any (or with very little) of these things, it’s a welcome change to enjoy them in moderation – you know, except the chocolate. Don’t bother moderating the chocolate.

10. Salon gift certificate. Maybe a facial, a massage, or a pedicure, but definitely a winner. If you’re brave, you could add a clause about keeping that sweet little snuggler while she gets pampered!

What else would you add? Anything else super useful that gets overlooked?

home, mommyhood, pregnancy

Currently

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I’m linking up with Becky at Choose Happy and the other fantastic bloggers for another week of “Currently”, where we just talk about what’s going on in our lives. Join us, and let us know what you’re up to!

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Thankful for || my mother-in-law and our friends Lauren and Drew for coming over on Saturday to help us get things out of our storage unit and into the basement! My m-i-l was kind enough to play with kiddos while the rest of us made 400 trips from the unit into the house with our arms full of boxes or furniture. It was a lovely, productive afternoon!

Excited about || fully moving in, getting the rest of our furniture for the new space (and/or rearranging what we’ve got, and buying something new for an old space!), and getting ready to host the masses for EK’s birthday! My college girlfriends are coming to town, as well as my family, to celebrate EK’s third birthday the second weekend in April. The clock is ticking to get things ready for houseguests and a party!

Listening to || this arrangement of Give Me Jesus by Sarah Watkins and Chris Thile. I sang this song yesterday during church, probably a little less bluegrassily (yeah, I made that word up for this sentence), but I still thought it was beautiful.

Loving || the fact that J is singing wherever he goes, all the time. He sings mostly Happy Birthday and the Alphabet Song, with only two or three real words, but it is so heartwarming to see both my kids loving music so early.

Feeling || BIG feelings. No matter what my feeling is (happy, sad, angry, etc) I’m literally feeling it times a million. Thanks, hormones. Here’s to extra tears, random frustrations, and ridiculous laughter. Pregnancy – the struggle is real.

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faith, mommyhood, pregnancy, women

Loving on All the Mamas

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I was excited to attend a baby shower over the weekend for a friend who is due with her first baby in June. There were a total of 6 of us (out of maybe 17 or 18) at the shower that were pregnant. Even knowing that a shower is typically a lot of gals around the same age, I felt like that was a lot! But it was SO fun to see gals in every stage of life – and several stages of pregnancy – getting together to celebrate my friend and her new little life she’s expecting. 
I think one of the most important things we can do is celebrate pregnant women. Celebrate women in general, obviously, but there are so many unique ways that you can celebrate and bless women who are expecting. Whether or not they have supportive families, if they got pregnant on the first try, or tried for years, new lives are worth celebrating. As a mother of soon-to-be three, I believe that feeling celebrated for every single one of my pregnancies was really special for me. It wasn’t necessarily a shower or gift or party that made me feel special – it was friends’ and family members’ reactions to our announcement, and meaningful things they said (and are continuing to say) throughout.

Women need encouragement. Expecting mamas and new mamas often need it even more. They need to know that they are made for what they’re doing, that they will figure out the best way to raise that little one. Does that mean it’ll always be easy and come naturally? No. But it does mean that we should encourage all mothers in their journey.

I saw something recently about how a mother who had experienced a long journey with infertility and finally was blessed with children through IVF felt the need to defend her children against someone who said her children were “synthetic”. Who on this earth has the right to say that to anyone? To suggest that babies, children, humans are anything but God-given and made of DNA and cells and souls just like “the rest of us” is the most awful thing you could say. So many mothers today are faced with insecurities and fears, not to mention the ever-growing plethora of choices about every single thing to do/be/get for your baby… why would one then start attacking the babies themselves, saying terrible things about how or when or why they were brought into the world?!

So this is where I feel a call to be encouraging, supportive and just plain loving to mothers of all experience levels, all walks of life, and all kinds and numbers of babies. Whatever the reason you become a mother, you should still be celebrated, supported and encouraged. If you know a mama, or a woman who is expecting, do something nice for them. Say a kind word, pop a note in the mail, or pick up their coffee. If you’re close to them, get them a gift, throw them a shower (or sprinkle!) or pray with/for them. I guarantee you, each of them needs a little love, a little encouragement, or just to be seen, known, and loved.

It can be hard… pregnancy, waiting for an adoption to go through, enduring fertility treatments, having little ones, or struggling with teens. All of those things can be hard on a woman, and I know that sometimes a little encouragement can go a long way. That nice thing you do for the mom? It’ll benefit the child, too.

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faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus, pregnancy, siblings

I am exhausted.

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This post appeared on the My Big Jesus blog!  We spent today bopping around town, carrying kids to and fro, shopping for this and getting ready for that. Our house is a madhouse, like it often is these days. I don’t mind – really, I don’t. I know that it’s a season, and that things will return to a semi-normal. I know that my kids will be these ages but once. I know that my niece and nephew (who I also got to see this evening!) will be these ages but once.

Yet, my lovely and insightful mother-in-law said something to me, in passing really, tonight that made me think. She had spent the morning with my son, and part of the afternoon with my daughter. She said, “I don’t know how y’all do it with these two. I guess I did it with mine, but I’m exhausted!” Going on, she explained that she meant chasing them around her house, entertaining them, and making sure nothing got broken.

Well let me tell you, I understood her completely. While my house is basically baby-proofed and I can let them run free a little more in our home than she can in hers (split-level=stairs upon stairs) I am still frequently exhausted at the end of the day. Even if I haven’t completed a single housekeeping task, or didn’t get in a work out, or haven’t left the house, or if I did catch a little snooze during someone’s naptime, I’m often exhausted.

It isn’t simply that my back hurts, or that I’m sleep deprived, although sometimes those things are true. (Have you lugged around a 30lb sack of flour recently?) It’s emotional exhaustion. It’s mental exhaustion. I’m not a creative person, so EK really makes me work my imagination (ie: silly voices, strange scenarios, and telling her “stories” that I made up). I’m constantly trying to think of ways to educate – nay, entertain – two developmental levels, two totally different personalities. I’m trying to explain to my daughter why she should share, can’t push her brother, and shouldn’t scream in the house. I’m trying to distract my son when he just wants to be held – for the entire 12 hours he is awake. I’m trying to make healthy breakfasts and dinners that also look enticing and taste delicious. I’m trying to not lose patience with messes and attitudes and too-short naps and refused meals. It’s a lot. It’s trying, giving, sacrificing, and pushing myself.

So yes, in a word, I’m exhausted. I’m exhausted when I think of how much love I’ve got in my heart for these little beings that need me so. I’m exhausted when I think that by the end of this summer, I’ll have a third little being that needs me like these two do. I’m exhausted when I think that in 18 years, they’ll need me so much less. I’m exhausted to think they won’t always snuggle into my neck or say “mmmmmm-ah!” when I ask for a kiss. But being exhausted in the midst of right now is a fulfilled, happy exhaustion. When I slip into my bed, and don’t have time to finish one sentence in my book, I’m not really upset about it. I’m just wishing I had more patience, more creativity, more knowledge to share with those exciting, excitable toddlers that I call my own.