Category Archives: women

Giving a REALLY Good Baby Shower Gift

April 1, 2015 Only Hsuman 14 Comments

If you’re like me, at 29 years old, you’ve been to a billion baby showers, possibly including your own. You’ve known young moms and old, had at least one close friend have a baby, and needed to hit up the local baby store for a set of bottles or a sweet, monogrammed blanket.

This is like a mini-throwback from my shower before EK was born. These are my college girlfriends!

That being said, those gifts are sweet: bottles, blankets, teethers, etc. They’re thoughtful, useful, and probably from the mom’s registry. But there are a few things that, as a mama who’s attended some baby showers, I’ve learned are really great gifts that new parents love, even if they aren’t quite as cute in the gift wrap.
On the heels of the success of my “10 Tips for Soon-To-Be Moms“, here are a few unconventional but awesome baby shower gift ideas.

1. Stain remover. I really love the BabyGanics Stain Remover (find it on Diapers.com) personally, but Shout and OxyClean also are winners. I always include a bottle of the BabyGanics with whatever I get the new mama.

2. Clothes in bigger sizes. Yes, those newborn outfits are cute, and yes, the tinier they are, the cuter, somehow. BUT there are two reasons to stay away from the tiniest clothes you see: 1. Everyone else is buying them, too. While newborns probably have lots of costume changes, no mama needs 59 outfits for the first week of the baby’s life. 2. Babies grow really, really fast. And some babies, like my J, never wear newborn sized clothes anyway. He was a little long and a little porky for most of the newborn-sized clothes I had, so he jumped straight to three months size. I’d love to have gotten more cute clothes in nine months size and up, even all the way to 3T! Kids always need play clothes, and if you’re worried about sizes for the right seasons, just get t-shirts and leggings (girls) or jeans because those are can be worn in every season.

3. Restaurant gift certificates. Whether for a date night before the baby comes, or after, or for take out during the first few weeks where life is a blur, providing a meal is always a good thing.

4. Laundry detergent, dish soap, or hand sanitizer. These are great gifts, because we go through TONS of it in the baby’s first month or two. Dreft or any natural brand (insert second BabyGanics plug) is great for laundry, natural dish soaps (Honest Company, Mrs. Meyer’s, etc) for paci/bottle/teether washing, and hand sanitizer for every single soul who walks through your front door. Sorry germs, ain’t nobody got time for that.

5. Diapers or wipes. Some mamas have a huge bias when it comes to these (brands, cloth diapering, etc) but it’s easy to ask them what their plan is, and offer to contribute to it. Even if you’re cloth diapering, it can be an expensive undertaking. And just like clothes, diaper sizes change often as well, so don’t get two jumbo cases of newborn sizes… go all the way up to 4 or 5 if you want. I promise. They’ll be used.

6. Don’t be afraid to go gender neutral. This is important especially for bigger ticket items. It’s super cute that your baby girl’s carseat is covered in pink flowers, but when your second baby is a boy, and you have to buy a new one, that’s a big bummer. This also applies, in my book, to things like burp cloths, muslin swaddles, crib sheets, bath towels, socks (Yeah, I said it. What’s wrong with white?), and toys. I know, you can get teethers and noisemakers that are all princessy, or all have trucks on them, but why can’t you just get the ones covered in giraffes?

7. Baby food pouches. For the most part, these things stay good a long while, and they’re great even for moms who want to make their own baby food, because you can find things that might be out of season, or that are a little more expensive fresh for the same price – not to mention they are GREAT for being on the go. Choose simple, though, and get pouches that have only one or two ingredients (just peaches, or plain ol’ applesauce) instead of blends, and always go organic. (I like the Plum Organics brand a lot, just by the way.)

8. Housecleaning service. I don’t think it’s too forward to pay for a few hours of a housecleaning service so that mama can worry not about her floors and toilets during the first month or two post-partum. She’ll just thank you later.

9. Wine, booze, coffee, and chocolate. It may sound silly, but after nine months without any (or with very little) of these things, it’s a welcome change to enjoy them in moderation – you know, except the chocolate. Don’t bother moderating the chocolate.

10. Salon gift certificate. Maybe a facial, a massage, or a pedicure, but definitely a winner. If you’re brave, you could add a clause about keeping that sweet little snuggler while she gets pampered!

What else would you add? Anything else super useful that gets overlooked?

faith, mommyhood, pregnancy, women

Loving on All the Mamas

March 25, 2015 Only Hsuman 4 Comments

I was excited to attend a baby shower over the weekend for a friend who is due with her first baby in June. There were a total of 6 of us (out of maybe 17 or 18) at the shower that were pregnant. Even knowing that a shower is typically a lot of gals around the same age, I felt like that was a lot! But it was SO fun to see gals in every stage of life – and several stages of pregnancy – getting together to celebrate my friend and her new little life she’s expecting.
I think one of the most important things we can do is celebrate pregnant women. Celebrate women in general, obviously, but there are so many unique ways that you can celebrate and bless women who are expecting. Whether or not they have supportive families, if they got pregnant on the first try, or tried for years, new lives are worth celebrating. As a mother of soon-to-be three, I believe that feeling celebrated for every single one of my pregnancies was really special for me. It wasn’t necessarily a shower or gift or party that made me feel special – it was friends’ and family members’ reactions to our announcement, and meaningful things they said (and are continuing to say) throughout.

Women need encouragement. Expecting mamas and new mamas often need it even more. They need to know that they are made for what they’re doing, that they will figure out the best way to raise that little one. Does that mean it’ll always be easy and come naturally? No. But it does mean that we should encourage all mothers in their journey.

I saw something recently about how a mother who had experienced a long journey with infertility and finally was blessed with children through IVF felt the need to defend her children against someone who said her children were “synthetic”. Who on this earth has the right to say that to anyone? To suggest that babies, children, humans are anything but God-given and made of DNA and cells and souls just like “the rest of us” is the most awful thing you could say. So many mothers today are faced with insecurities and fears, not to mention the ever-growing plethora of choices about every single thing to do/be/get for your baby… why would one then start attacking the babies themselves, saying terrible things about how or when or why they were brought into the world?!

So this is where I feel a call to be encouraging, supportive and just plain loving to mothers of all experience levels, all walks of life, and all kinds and numbers of babies. Whatever the reason you become a mother, you should still be celebrated, supported and encouraged. If you know a mama, or a woman who is expecting, do something nice for them. Say a kind word, pop a note in the mail, or pick up their coffee. If you’re close to them, get them a gift, throw them a shower (or sprinkle!) or pray with/for them. I guarantee you, each of them needs a little love, a little encouragement, or just to be seen, known, and loved.

It can be hard… pregnancy, waiting for an adoption to go through, enduring fertility treatments, having little ones, or struggling with teens. All of those things can be hard on a woman, and I know that sometimes a little encouragement can go a long way. That nice thing you do for the mom? It’ll benefit the child, too.

faith, home, mommyhood, women

Wifely Bragging Rights

March 19, 2015 Only Hsuman 4 Comments

A friend of mine posted in a Facebook group recently that she had heard too much recently about wives/moms/girlfriends doing some man-bashing. She suggested that women collectively take a few minutes to brag on their fellas. Naturally, being married to the best fella in the world, I figured I’d jump on in there!

This one is from the St. Patrick's party last weekend! — This one is from the St. Patrick’s party last weekend!

Y’all, my Hubby is a rockstar. I mean that literally and figuratively. He literally is the front man (a sexy one) in a band that plays and writes awesome music all the time. That makes him a rockstar. He’s also the most loving, patient, and hilarious husband and father I could ask to have a family with. He’s encouraging, challenging (in a good way), exciting, caring, and a hundred other things I would never have time to list, much less explain. In short, love of my life. Big time.

Photo Cred. to my incredible wedding photographer, Eleise Theuer. She is the bomb, y'all. — Photo Cred. to my incredible wedding photographer, Eleise Theuer. She is the bomb, y’all.

One of my favorite things about him is that he is fun. He can take a boring situation and make it awesome. He can cheer up a hormonal pregnant woman, a tired toddler, or a cranky baby. He can make you laugh while you’re crying. He can make you forget all your troubles, at least for a minute. He’s the best.

Hubby's brother snapped this one when we were in the reception band at his cousin's wedding last summer! — Hubby’s brother snapped this one when we were in the reception band at his cousin’s wedding last summer!

I often find myself watching something (like the Bachelor) or talking to a single girlfriend about a terrible date, and thinking “I’m so glad I’m married.” I mean that on the surface level, in an I-will-never-have-to-go-on-a-first-date way, and also a deeper way – I know I’m married to the best man in the world, and I’d never choose another path. I keep hearing Taylor Swift’s lyrics in Blank Space, “Boys only want love if its torture…” and thinking of all the women I know that have found that to be true. Then I think about how I will never again experience torture, or even unhappiness in my love life.

Also, he is the most incredible, totally competent, loving, nurturing dad I’ve ever seen. He kept EK and then J as well for two years while I taught full time. I never worried for one minute that they’d be anything but perfectly cared for. He is an amazing cook, and is always able to please the picky eaters – and his wife! He is an awesome photographer, and getting better every day. Here’s a sample of his magic:

EK in my mother-in-law's magical backyard. — EK in my mother-in-law’s magical backyard.

I’d never be able to say everything I want to and could possibly brag on him about, so I suppose I’ll spare you a full-on rant. But he truly is the most wonderful Hubby ever. I love him from the top of his head to the tips of his toes. I love him on his good days and his bad (though there aren’t many of those). I’m the most blessed woman on the planet. Really. I love you, babe.

books, women

Book Review – Yes Please by Amy Poehler

March 5, 2015 Only Hsuman 1 Comment

In honor of World Book Day, here’s a review of a world-class comedy…

Love Amy Poehler? Me too. Cry a little when the Parks finale aired? Me too. Frequently re-watch her SNL episodes and think the Golden Globes she hosted with Tina Fey were the best thing ever? ME TOO! So go read her book!

I started her book knowing I was going to love it, and she delivered. I laughed, and I might’ve even teared up a few times. She talks about career, her family, her friends (Tina Fey and Seth Meyers, especially) and everything in between. She’s just as humorous on paper as she is on screen, and I was a junkie for the little nuggets she’d reveal about this SNL sketch or that episode of Parks & Recreation.

I was also struck by her humanity – how she talked about waitressing to make it in Chicago, when she finally got “her teeth fixed” and when she visited orphanages Haiti. She is extremely real, and I love that. She didn’t feel the need to be funny on every single page, and I loved that too.

She also talked about “Smart Girls” – an incentive she started with a friend to empower young girls to be powerful, intelligent and successful women. Talk about a feminist in a real way, not just a philosophical one.

Basically, I want to be friends with Amy Poehler. Can anyone hook me up with that opportunity?

home, random thoughts, teaching, women

So Long, Sweet Briar.

March 4, 2015 Only Hsuman Leave a comment

My heart is breaking. I can’t imagine how I would feel, as a 20-or-so year old, finding out that my college, my home, my world, is closing. Sweet Briar College, a women’s institution founded in 1901, is closing its doors, due to “insurmountable financial challenges”.

I know that during my time at Salem College, I lived in that bubble in a serious way. Yes, I was venturing out and about, and learning about my world and how I would contribute to it, but I was also surrounded by some of the most wonderful and inspiring women, living in an architectural (and sometimes cultural – in a good way) time capsule, and my world was revolving around classes and projects and events and meal times. I can’t imagine someone telling me that all of sudden, my education is in jeopardy, I have to find a new home, and I can’t come back to the place I love.

Wow.

Luckily, I know that women’s colleges across the country are not closing their doors. They are preparing for more women to transfer in, and make the most of an experience that’s been forced on them. I know that Salem is probably not alone in preparing to welcome newcomers from Sweet Briar. We’ve had an anonymous alumna volunteer to pay the application fees of any Sweet Briar transfer applying for this coming fall. That’s huge, y’all.

I posted an article on Facebook yesterday about 10 other women’s colleges that are thriving in the midst of this sadness. They listed Sarah Lawrence College (which got a shout out in 10 Things I Hate About You), Salem College (my sweet, fantastic alma mater), Mills College, Simmons College, Bryn Mawr, Spelman College, College of St. Benedict, Mount Holyoke College, and Converse College. However, they didn’t add Hollins, Meredith, Agnes Scott, or Wellesley. And those are just the ones that I know off the top of my head and didn’t have to look up! Women’s colleges and universities are thriving all over the country, making women more and more awesome as we speak. I’m proud, ecstatic, and thrilled to be one of those women.

Now the next thing I say might get some pushback from even Salem graduates. But it needs to be addressed. Are you also sad that Sweet Briar is closing? Or that Randolph-Macon Women’s College became co-ed in 2007? Or that Peace College began admitting men in 2012, and then changed its name a couple of years later? There’s an easy way to help. Donate. Give.

I know, I know… you feel like there was one experience you didn’t feel was a positive one. Or maybe you feel like you were forced to stay there by a parent who told you that transferring wasn’t an option. Or maybe, like me, they don’t even offer your degree anymore, so why give? Those are selfish reasons. If other women are getting a great education, being shaped into incredible women, why not give for those women? Why not donate even a little bit for those women? Or so that your degree won’t be discontinued? Or that those crappy dorms can be updated? Anyone can donate to any college. There are annual funds, capital campaigns, tons of funds to donate to for every school. Your small gift can mean that one more woman can be set up for a successful and happy life. It’s that simple.

faith, random thoughts, women

Wonderful Women

February 28, 2015 Only Hsuman Leave a comment

Last night, I attended a “women’s supper club” for a group of women from my church. It was FANTASTIC. There was sharing, laughing, crying, hugging, praying, talking, teaching, and loving each other. I met new women, reconnected with some I hadn’t seen recently, and chuckled and snuggled with women I know well. It was a much-needed night of frivolity and fellowship and faith-building. I realized this: I have lots of wonderful women in my life, and I love finding more. You can never have too many women who are peers, women who are mentors, women who are mentees, women who have walked through your trenches, and women who are in them right beside you.

Women were created for relationship. It’s in our nature. God created Adam, and then created him a companion in Eve. I think that we were created for communication, fellowship, compassion, and love. This isn’t just limited to a romantic relationship, or familial relationship. This very nature of women spreads to all relationships – friends, acquaintances, strangers, all.

I’ve had several blog friends recently start up ways for women to connect with and find friends online (in a non-creepy or stalkerish way haha). Women can be lonely without a group, without a tribe. I am lucky in that I have a tribe built in where I live, but I still want to grow it! I want to help women connect with each other, build meaningful relationships, and make lasting impressions on each other. I know how important those types of relationships have been in my life, and how much they still will be for the rest of it.

I’m not sure the way I want to go about this yet. I want to help y’all out, help you get to know each other, help you find gals in your area who are like-minded and need a group of friends as well. I want to make it authentic and not forced. I want to make it realistic and long-lasting. So it’s a tall order, but it’s on my heart. And I’m going to be praying about it. It already makes me excited!

Please comment if you have ideas, ways to connect that are already in place, or anything else you think might be helpful in the process. If you’re a praying person, I invite you to join me in prayer in the first steps of the process, and for the hearts of the women that might get involved!

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