Category Archives: mommyhood

home, mommyhood, random thoughts, women

Celebrate. 

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This weekend was one of celebration. First of all, I was able to leave the house and get my extrovert on after days of sickness keeping me quite housebound. That in itself is a celebration, in my opinion! 

But on top of that, I celebrated all weekend long. Friday, there was a huge party for my friend’s 50th birthday. An evening filled with food, drinks, friends and music, it was a celebration of a life lived well, a group of people who have loved each other well, and a continuation of relationships and fun. 

Then Saturday night, I went to a girls’ night. It was a celebration of cooler weather, of bonfires, of wassail and of silly games. I got to know a few new ladies and reconnect with some I haven’t hung with in a while. A wonderful celebration of girlfriends. 

Folks, is there any good thing that isn’t worth celebrating? I mean, seriously. Is there a single good thing, big or small, that isn’t worth a celebration of some sort? I don’t mean greeting card categories: “congrats on your new job!”, “happy milestone birthday!”, or “lovely engagement!” I also mean “good job not losing your sanity at the office today!” and “wow, you showered and went to the grocery store?!” Sometimes, the little things need a celebration. 

In this case, I’m a text-celebrater. I often text my hubby or my girlfriends to say “Everyone is napping at the same time!” Or “My favorite wine is on sale!” because darn it, it’s worth celebrating! In my opinion, celebrating small victories (or just times you went down a busy road and hit all green lights) can lift your mood, and why not share a good mood with your friends?

This post is part of my NaBloPoMo, where I publish a piece every day in November. It may stray a bit from my usual style, but I’m writing each day to exercise the muscle!

mommyhood, NaBloPoMo, random thoughts

Overcome

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I wrote this some months ago, thinking of submitting it here or there. It never seemed fully cohesive, but I’ve come to a stand-still on how to improve it. So here it is, unfinished, but meaningful to me. It’s time I let it go.

I was overcome.

In an instant, I was overcome with thoughts and fears and hopes and dreams, and overwhelmed by the flood of emotions.

I saw my little ones for what they would become… Independent. Whole. Grown. I saw them that moment not needing me anymore. Not wanting to hold my hand, or worse, preferring to hold someone else’s instead.

The tears came then, even as I strapped my baby into his car seat. His brother was dancing around the room, chanting the name of the cousin we were off to see. That dancing boy wasn’t as clumsy, and he spoke more clearly. What had happened to my barely toddling, nonsense-jabbering baby? He is still there, the same chubby smile beneath the same blue eyes. But so many things are different. The mixed emotions of pride in his growth and sadness in his disappearing babyhood flooded me at the same time. Excitement mingled with nostalgia is the feeling that replaced the months of tiredness mingled with nausea.

I know that when I have a baby, he won’t stay that way. I’m not surprised by the growth and the change. It’s actually the fun part, discovering alongside them, helping them learn and talk and walk and become a little more self-sufficient each day. But there’s a sadness, too, and sometimes, some days, I’m overcome by it. I need to shed a few tears for the baby they’ve left behind, because all I’ll have is memories of that little round face, bald head, or chubby hand. But I will have gained a runner, a cook, a hugger, and a singer. I’ll have a new friend, a hilarious joker, a brave and athletic boy, a smart and sensitive girl. I am glad for the shift. I am glad for the change. But that doesn’t mean I won’t miss the past.

This post is part of my NaBloPoMo, where I publish a  piece each day in November.

faith, holidays, home, mommyhood, NaBloPoMo, random thoughts

Find Your Sabbath in Autumn

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It’s that time of year. The perfect season. Coffee tastes better. The air smells fresher. Cuddling in the blankets a little later in the morning feels so good, especially because it’s a little darker for a little longer. 

I also love the balance that it provides in my own life. Autumn is a busy season. School is in full swing, the holidays are approaching, and if you aren’t careful, there is little rest. But we have also been called to find rest. We have been called to find Sabbath rest (Hebrews 4:9-10) even in the midst of our busy seasons. That doesn’t necessarily mean that the schedules will clear, or that you’ll sleep more, or that it will look any certain way. Rather, it means a shift in thought. It’s a change of perspective. It’s a way of looking at and living in the world with the peace of God in your heart. 

Sounds easy, right?

It’s not. Not always, anyway. It can be difficult to feel peaceful in everything you do. Most workplaces driven by efficiency don’t also have a peaceful atmosphere. Rush hour at 5pm doesn’t hold a peaceful feeling. Your children don’t seem peaceful when they wake at 6am hungry. 

But this is the gift of God: that you shall find Sabbath rest, because He is allowing you to. He has given you that gift, and all you need do is receive it. That doesn’t make it easy, but it makes it available to us. If we can walk in the faith that God has peacefulness and rest for us… that is the real Sabbath rest. 

So this season… this busy season of warm coffee, chilly air, cooking, shopping, carpooling, and preparing… this season is the perfect time to take a minute, and ask the Lord to help you accept that perfect rest. Rest that is the ceasing of striving to do it all ourselves. Rest that is feeling loved and taken care of by the One who is sovereign over every single thing. His gift to us is His peace. We only need to say yes. 

This post is part of my NaBloPoMo, where I publish a piece every day in November. Many of the posts will be writing exercises, sometimes straying from my usual style. 

home, mommyhood, NaBloPoMo, random thoughts

I hate sick.  

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The past few days have been hard. I am fortunate that I’ve had remarkably healthy children, and so true that “sick days” really are few and far between. That might make it even worse that when we do deal with a sickness, no matter what kind or how many members of our family have it, it’s just no fun. 

Today, I’m running on very little sleep. So is Hubby. So are the kids. The boys have had hand, foot, mouth disease, and they’re exhausted, uncomfortable, and upset they missed trick or treating and are still missing school. We are all going a little stir crazy, and wishing we could at least go to the park. But we won’t- we will just wait it out until the fever is totally gone and their wounds heal a little. 

They’ve recovered quickly, thank goodness. But I know from experience that HFMD leaves its marks for weeks. They won’t feel the effects for that long, but I’ll have to explain them for a while, and assure other parents that they aren’t contagious any longer. I mean, I’m a responsible adult. I wouldn’t knowingly send my kids to school a) feeling badly or b) spreading terrible germs. 

That being said, it’s tough. We have an established routine, and now it’s been thrown off kilter. Bedtimes are skewed, naptimes are odd, meals are here and there (especially for the one who had worse sores in his mouth) and we are going stir crazy. We are ready for normal. The bigs have been asking to go to the park and the excuse of “but you’ve been sick” isn’t working that well. We’ve taken walks around the neighborhood (strapped in the stroller, of course) and played in the yard, because their energy is beginning to come back. But my little extroverts are tired of being homebound. 

So here’s to Tylenol and movie watching, and we’ll see y’all out in the real world this weekend. 

This post is part of my NaBloPoMo, where I publish a piece every day in November. Many of the posts will be writing exercises, sometimes straying from my usual style. 

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday! In keeping with our Tuesday tradition, here are our recent funnies! I hope you enjoy their crazy thoughts!

 Heard in the back seat…

EK: Put the icing in the cookie! You mean on the cookie? No! In the cookie! Ahhhh!

At the gas pump…
EK: Mom! I’m watching for the numbers to stop!
J: And I’m watching for a stop sign!

J, randomly: FLY IN THE HOUSE! FLY IN THE HOUSE!

EK hands me a bunny I had when I was growing up: Look what I bought for you, Mommy!
Me: Um, no.

Necie invited EK to spend the night with her…
EK: I packed for like ten days. And on the seventh day, you will bring me home safely.

EK and Necie drawing lady bugs…
EK: I’ll make Daddy’s in boy colors. 

EK, to the tune of “Happy Birthday”: Happy Halloween to you! Happy Halloween to you! Happy Halloween, all the womans! Happy Halloween, Je-sus!”

Driving past a bulldozer…
EK: J, look out your window! You love those, huh?

Listening to my set list for church while we’re in the car…
J: Mommy! I hear you in the radio!
EK: Yeah, there are two of you in the car!

J, saying our prayers: pray for Wesley and Holly and our cousins. And I want to get in a helicopter and go to Taiwan and see them.
Me: Me too, buddy.

EK and J having a tea party with a stuffed animal…
EK: Mom! We got a serious problem over here!
Me: What’s going on?
EK: This man can’t walk! (Pointing to stuffed animal.)
Me: Oh no! Are his legs broken?
EK: Just this one.
Me: Should we try to find him a wheelchair?
EK: Nah, I’m just gonna fix it.

EK: Do you have Miss Crystal’s number? (Her teacher)
Me: No, but I have her email address so I could send her a message.
EK: Oh. I think it’s 851, but I’ll ask her tomorrow at school.

Well, hope you enjoyed this week’s edition of Things Toddlers Say! Check back every Tuesday for more funnies!

holidays, mommyhood, My Big Jesus, parenting fails, random thoughts

Halloween Fail

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus. 

My family is a Disney-loving crew. Hubby and I grew up watching the movies, visiting Disney world, collecting paraphernalia and loving every minute, so why shouldn’t we do that with our kids?

That being said, we recognized this year as the perfect year for a group costume. We could still dictate what the kids would dress up as, and pull off a silly, matching family costume. Because we’re a group of five, we decided on the Incredibles.

True story: Hubby and I were Mr. and Mrs. Incredible before we had kids (see below) because we happen to have pretty good body types for it – aka Hubby is a big, strong dude, and I have short hair and hips. (Disclaimer: our attempt to make Hubby’s hair blond simply turned it green. Oops.)

So naturally, with that being our best costume together ever, we decided to bring it back with our three kids. I started looking for the costumes (less iron-on this time) and rounding up everyone’s parts. I got really excited, and let the kids run around in their outfits several times. This week, Hubby and I finally tried on ours!

Oh crap.

We aren’t huge people. Okay, well, fine. Hubby is a heavyweight wrestler, but I ordered him the largest size so it should’ve been fine. But I’m not a huge person! And I ordered my costume based on their sizing chart! I should’ve known that superhero outfits would be… well… tight. And that a $30 costume wouldn’t be… uh… totally well-made. So naturally, Hubby and I are melted and poured into our costumes. Because I ordered them according to size charts. UGH I don’t want to go to my church’s Trunk or Treat in a costume fit for a Sig Ep party. So I get on figuring out how to be a little more comfortable and less… risqué.

It just so happens that I have a friend who had the same idea I did – family of 5 Disney lovers, young kids – obviously they’re also the Incredibles. I shot her a text – “What do I do?!” She said, “Oh, you’re also Elastigirl: Brazilian Edition?” Yikes. Looks like we are both in a pinch – literally. We each brainstormed ideas of what to put on top to just cover up – black bathing suit bottoms? Probably not that helpful. A tutu? Black granny panties? Finally I decided on a black skirt I have that would cover more than a tutu would, and be more comfortable to boot. Hubby decided to wear a pair of black shorts over his, and a red shirt underneath. Preventing a wardrobe malfunction was a little more difficult than I had anticipated.

So now, after much deliberation on what to wear, how to wear it, and all the excitement building for the last few weeks, two out of our three kids are sick. The other probably will have it soon, so she’s also in quarantine. No trunk or treat. No visiting neighbors. No collecting candy from every house on the block. No wearing our costumes, unless it’s while we sit in our house with the lights off. This Halloween still ended up being a huge fail.

This is us, on our back porch, before I put a note on the door and turned the lights out.

This post is part of my NaBloPoMo, where I publish a piece every day in November. Many of the posts will be writing exercises, sometimes straying from my usual style. 

home, mommyhood, random thoughts, women

Currently

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Happy Monday, and happy Halloween! I’ve never been more happy to not be in the classroom as I am right now. Monday + Halloween is the worst elementary school combo I can think of.

Since it’s already November,  I’m linking up with Anne in Residence and A Short Blonde for their first Wednesday link up as well. I haven’t done a little update in a few weeks, so here’s a little bit about what I’m currently doing!

Celebrating || my bestie’s new baby girl! She arrived last week, and I was excited to be able to spend most of my time in the hospital during her labor. It’s such an interesting and beautiful process, and it was really neat to be a part of it from the outside, versus being the mother in labor. Here’s a picture of sweet Adele being snuggled by my J.

Hoping || for a few good pictures for a Christmas card! My friend Mary Catherine was sweet enough to come take pictures of our family last night, and when I get done writing this post, I plan to go through them, and try to arrange a few for our Christmas card. There’s a sneak peek below…

Wearing || blanket scarves and ponchos and big sweaters. This is sort of new for me, but I found a couple of things at Target and one at TJ Maxx that I fell in love with, and they’re going to be my favorite accent pieces this fall. A couple of them are tribal patterns, which I love! They don’t work super well with coats, mostly because they’re bulky, so it’s likely that I’ll drop them when it gets really cold – maybe around Christmas time. This photo is a peek from our shoot with MC yesterday, and I’m wearing one of those pieces I love!

Enjoying || a quick date with Hubby yesterday afternoon! My mom has been in town for the past few days, and during naptime, she let us go to our local beer growler store and enjoy a couple of flights. It’s been a while since we were able to just sneak out like that. Our dates usually take a lot of planning.

Eating || So. Much. Pho. It’s such a good fall treat, and fairly healthy. If you don’t know anything about it, it’s basically chicken noodle soup, Vietnamese style. You can also get different kinds of meat, but it’s delicious broth, rice noodles, onions, bean sprouts, and toppings like cilantro, Thai basil, lime juice, and/or hot sauce. The weather cools off, and there’s nothing I like better to eat. The kids like it as well, so that’s an added bonus! But all this pho does remind me that it’s almost RAMEN TIME!

Googling || blog post topic ideas. I know that seems a little trite, but I’m going to join some writer friends in publishing a blog post every day for the month of November. It’s a spin-off of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), which works for me, since I’m not writing a novel (and don’t really plan to). But I love writing, so NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) is a perfect excuse to write and write and write some more. When I began this blog, I wrote something almost every day for the first several months. But as I got busier and wrote about a lot of things that I’d been saving up for, ya know, the first 28 years of my life, I ran out of QUITE as much material. That being said, kids are constant fodder for writing, and the world is constantly changing. I plan to keep it up!

Well, this catches you up a little bit on my life. What’s going on with you currently?

mommyhood

Holiday Get-Togethers: 5 Tips for a Good Time With Your Family

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus.

The holidays can be a time of love, laughter, and making memories. They can also be a time of too much travel, high stress levels, or even hurt feelings and unwanted drama. Here are a few tips to make the most out of your holiday get-togethers.

  1. Set the boundaries early. If you’re hosting, set a date and time for everyone to arrive… and also to go home. If you’re hosting a meal, it’s okay to say, “Everyone is invited for dinner from 5:00-8:00pm!” That’s plenty of time to eat and love on each other, if you say it is. If you’re hosting out of town family for a few days, it’s alright to tell them they’re welcome from the 24th-27th. The end. It’s easier to tell everyone that on the front end, than to welcome guests for who knows how long. An open-ended invitation can lead to someone overstaying their welcome.
  2. Keep your family on a semi-normal sleep schedule. If your baby usually takes a nap, try to still let her. If your toddler goes to bed super early, try not to extend his bedtime too late. Tired kiddos can make for difficult days, and sacrificing their sleep (or yours!) just to make something happen isn’t always a good choice.
  3. Make sure your family is fed. This sounds obvious when the holidays seem like they’re all about eating, but sometimes adults can eat huge lunches and not feel the need to eat much dinner… but kids and even teens are still going to need at least three meals a day, even if they forged themselves on turkey at lunch (or if they’re like mine, are three desserts).
  4. Make time to relax. This looks different for everyone, but especially if you have an introvert in your family (or you are one!) it’s important to have some time to zone out, read a book by yourself, or snuggle on the couch and watch a movie. Sometimes time with your own family unit gets scarce when you’re trying to see extended family.
  5. Don’t overcommit. This is the theme that ties 1-4 together, but it might be the most difficult one to achieve. It’s okay to not make the entire feast for your 30-member family all by yourself. It’s okay not to attend a Christmas party every single weekend in December. You don’t have to say yes to everything – be released right now from the pressure to do it all!

What would you add to this list for surviving the holidays?

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday! It’s been busy around here (more on that later!) so I’ve only just realized it’s actually Tuesday. Enjoy these funnies!

 J: You know what was on the tv?

Me: What?
J: A fairy ghost car!

Hubby: We’re going to Jimmy John’s for lunch!
EK: Where does he live?
J: Is that his name?

J: Mama, you know what I’m gonna do with my lunch?
Me: What?
J: I’m gonna eat it all!
Me: Great!
J: Yummmmm.

J, getting in my bed at the crack: There’s no room for me!
Sorry kid, it’s actually my bed.

Bedtime stalling techniques…
J: Is there a baby in your tummy?
Me: Nope, just the food I ate.
J: So squishy!
Me: Well thanks.
J: Can I see how soft your eyebrows are?
Me: I guess so.
J: So soft! And your earrings are so pretty! Tomorrow when the sun comes up I can play with them?
Me: Uh, yeah, good night.

EK, above: Mom! I can feel my forehead!

Me: Are you going to take one more big bite?
Ek: I’m gonna take the biggest bite! Biggest than Jesus!
Me: Okay…

Me: How’d you get so big?
EK: Because we went to lunch together!

J, when he woke from a long nap: You know why I’m cold? Cause it’s windy outside.

At bedtime…
J: Your earrings are bally, I guess.
Me: What?
J: Your earrings are bally.
Me: What do you mean?
J, flicks one earring: They’re balls. And silver. Can I wear one?
Me: Oh. And, uh, maybe tomorrow. (And then I run away laugh-crying.)

Eating a salad…
J: A cucumber fell into my mouth!
EK: Look, a green bracelet! (Green pepper ring)
J: And a purple necklace! (Purple onion ring)

Telling me about the babysitter…
J: She was nice. I liked her. I was not rude to she. I was only nice to she. So she was not rude.
Me: Well I guess that’s good!

EK: Daddy, I’m sorry J pooped on your bed while he was naked.
Everyone: What?!
(Rest assured- that didn’t actually happen.)

J: Do you know what I’m gonna be on Halloween?
EK: No noggin!
J: Don’t say no noggin!
Me: What are you gonna be, babe?
J: No noggin!!!!!
(If you’ve not watched Curious George’s Boo Fest, that’s what it’s from. It’s on Netflix!)

At breakfast…
EK: You know the the boys could be when they grow up? J could be a daddy and D could be a grandfather!
J: I actually want to be a pirate daddy. You could be a pirate mommy!
EK: I don’t WANT to be a pirate mommy!
Me: Seems legit.

What silly things are you kids saying these days?

faith, home, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

The Most Unlikely Guest

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus. 

Our house sometimes feels like grand central station.

We constantly come and go, and have friends, family members, babysitters, and sometimes others coming and going as well. We have what might be called an open door policy: people are welcome at most hours of most days. We host people several times a week, at different times of day, in various states of “clean” or “put together”.

But what we’ve realized is that people don’t care about dirty floors or a sink full of dishes. Well, most of them, thank goodness. They don’t care that I’ve typically got at least one kid clad only in underwear. They don’t mind that we’re just getting home, or preparing to leave, or that it’s bedtime and we need to be absent for twenty or thirty minutes. What they do care about is that they can come, just as crazy, flustered and broken as we are, and be welcomed. They can walk in, throw off their burdens and their self-consciousness and just be with us. We try to hold off on judgements and even advice-giving, and just show love, acceptance, and grace.

There are two reasons we do this. First, it’s what I would want someone to do for me. For example, when I show up to church on Sunday and Thursday mornings, I have two or three kids in tow, as well as all my belongings I’ll need for a morning of worship and work. I’m packing breakfast and activities for the kiddos, backpacks, jackets, my iPad and purse, waters for all, coffee for survival and whatever junk I’ve already acquired onto myself for the morning. If I came into an environment of shame, I’d crumble immediately. There would be no way to survive the next few hours without a group of people who love me, and know my situation as well as my heart. I need their grace and acceptance as I attempt to lead them – while wrangling my children and their breakfast.

The second reason is that Christ calls us into a spirit of hospitality, acceptance, love, and grace. He calls us to open our hearts, minds, homes and lives to ministry of all types. Working in a church or on a predetermined mission field is not the only way to minister to the masses. Sometimes, living life alongside someone, not hiding your blemishes and flaws, and genuinely loving someone is a bigger testament to what I believe and whom I represent than if I were to force Scriptures or sermons on a stranger, trying to convince them I knew what I was talking about. (Nothing against evangelism with strangers – just presenting another kind of evangelism opportunity.)

Hospitality can feel, at times, like too much work. But just presenting an opportunity for relationship to happen, together with people who either need or want to be a part of the message that’s told by your life can make a huge impact on even the most unlikely guest.