Tag Archives: faith

faith, mommyhood, music

Currently

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I love linking up with Jenna at A Mama Collective and all the other fantastic gals for the Currently series. Here goes nothin’!

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Thinking about high school. I never really reminisce like this, but my ten-year reunion was this past weekend. I saw some great people I haven’t seen in years, and partied with some good friends (and teachers!) that I don’t get to see often. On the one hand, I love seeing people in person and looking into their eyes while we catch up. On the other hand, thank goodness for social media because otherwise I’d have reverted into my awkward, high school self because I wouldn’t have known anything about anyone’s life nowadays. It was actually easier because I knew a little bit and was able to make conversation. Anyway, it was a blast. I loved reconnecting with several people I never get to see.

Listening to Kari Jobe singing “Forever” by Bethel Music. Here’s the link for my favorite video:

This song (we actually talked about in our worship team meeting last week) is a perfect example of a great worship song. Structurally, dynamically, lyrically, and just in the open-ended nature and worship opportunity that the song creates. One of my favorite things is that it all starts with a reflection on the cross. In short, I am digging it.

Thankful for Hubby. I’m always thankful for him, but I’m in a season right now of really appreciating the way he loves me well, the love he has (and shows!) for our kids, and the commitment he has to our family. He is an excellent man, folks.

Loving the fact that TV has started back up for the fall. I know that’s a silly thing, but I am so happy!

Enjoying  my new small groups. Hubby and I are a part of a community group that meets every other Sunday. Six couples, all in different stages of life, and I love it. Such fun people! I’m also in a new women’s small group on Thursday mornings. The gals I got linked with are great, different ages/walks of life, some I know and some I don’t yet. It’s already been fun, and we’ve only met twice! Yay for beginning this year full of great new relationships!

Doing life with my mama friends these past couple of months has been awesome. For instance, this morning, my friend Steph popped in for a cup of coffee after dropping her son off at preschool. We just visited, chatted and watched the kids play. I love being so close to her (geographically and as friends) that she can pop over while I’m still in my pajamas and we can just drink coffee and be.

Join the link up party! What are you up to Currently?

faith, My Big Jesus

Your Mercies Are New Every Morning

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Fall has always felt like a new beginning for me. That’s partially because it’s been linked to the start of a new school year, but it’s also because of the change that happens. We move from hot and sunny and stifling and dry into a cooler, more pleasant few months. I don’t like frigid cold, but I appreciate the brisk, crisp fall air. I like sunny days that are also chilly. I like always having a warm drink in my biggest mug. I also like the layers and scarves and boots of my fall wardrobe. I digress.

Since it’s fall, and I am overcome with a feeling of fresh start, there’s a verse that has been on my heart recently. My women’s small group used it as their memory verse a couple of weeks ago.

Lamentations 3:22-23: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

His mercies are new every morning. How beautiful is that idea? Whatever you did yesterday, or didn’t do yesterday, you have a clean slate each morning. Bring your messes to The Lord and be redeemed, because He is bigger than your mess.

As an (extremely) imperfect woman, wife, mother, and friend, I find great joy in knowing that He has overcome my sins and my failures. His plan for me is bigger and better than the lunch date I forgot about, the laundry I didn’t do, and the unkind words I have spoken to Hubby. In I Peter we are reminded to love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins. I am thankful for a Father who loves me deeply and perfectly. I am thankful for perfect example of love to serve as a model for the love that I should give to others.

faith, mommyhood

One Word To Breathe

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I got this idea from Sasha over at MomLife Now. (I love her blog!!) She asked if you had one word to breathe – to breathe in and breathe out all day long – what would it be? Hers was “content”. I think I can relate, and my word (my interpretation of it anyway) is similar. After a few minutes’ thought, I decided on “rest”.

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I feel like my life can get so crazy. It can be busy even when by all accounts it shouldn’t be. I can really get bogged down by the everyday stuff that doesn’t matter in the long run. I am often easily frustrated and not so easily soothed. So the word “rest” has so much meaning for me.

Rest obviously has its physical connotations. But I also believe the thought should be applied to every aspect of your life. For me, in this moment, I do want to remember to rest physically. But I also need to rest spiritually in the place where the Lord has me. I need to rest at this moment in my kids’ lives, and appreciate the stages they are in currently (however much I wish they’d go back a little or forward a little). I need to rest in the openness of my schedule and my moments that aren’t contracted out to anyone else’s to-do list.

Wherever you are in life, whatever stage you’re in, job you go to, relationship you value, rest in it. Rest in that place and time with those people. Find a moment to calm your mind, and rest in it. Where is it that you’re resting right now?

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

She Loves You (Yeah Yeah Yeah!)

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With kids, everything happens in stages. Stages of waking up every few hours, and stages of sleeping through the night. Stages of independence, and stages of debilitating neediness. Stages of picky eating, and stages of so hungry they’ll eat sidewalk chalk after a three course meal. These stages – seasons, I like to call them – go by alarmingly fast sometimes.

Recently EK has entered into a season of snuggling, hugging and kissing. Voluntarily showing love, basically. It’s particularly merciful because this season is on the heels of a difficult season of not wanting to sit still enough to snuggle, yet screaming and crying if we left her for even a moment. But she has (for the time being) moved on to confidently knowing we’ll come back, and giving us smooches for the road.

For instance, the other evening I was leaving to go to a birthday party, and left the kids with a friend. When I announced that I was leaving, told her I loved her, and turned toward the door, she ran over to me saying, “Hug! Hug!” So of course I picked her up, and she said, “Bye bye mama. I miss you.” Talk about melting a mama’s heart. I mean, seriously… when I pick her up to hug her these days, she snuggles my neck, pats my back and strokes my hair! It’s truly a Pat yourself on the back, you good parent, you! sort of thing. The gestures of love she’s received from Hubby and me are being given back to us. She has so internalized our love and the way we show it that she is giving that love back out.

What if we, as children of God, took the gestures of love shown to us by the Father, and gave it back to Him? Or better yet, passed it on to others? The Heavenly Father gave up his only son for you. And me. And our families. And old folks in nursing homes. And inner city children. And celebrities. And sleazy politicians. And murderers and thieves. He loves us (all of us!) that much. As much as I love my children (a ludicrous amount), it’s only a fraction of the love God has for me. If we take even a portion of the love and blessing we’ve received from the Father, and multiply it by passing it on? That’s Kingdom business.

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus, teaching

I have no “back to school”.

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But isn't it nice that I'm with this gal all day?
But isn’t it nice that I’m with this gal all day?

It’s fall. The weather is cooling off (thankfully), the pumpkins are out in front of every grocery store, Halloween decorations are popping up everywhere, and all I hear on the radio is that the stupid fair is coming soon. My daughter has started preschool. Church activities have been going for weeks. But something feels… weird.

It’s the first time in my life that I haven’t gone “back to school”. When I graduated high school, I went to college. When I graduated college, I taught middle school chorus for three years, then elementary school music for three more years. And here I am. Not back to school.

I’m not regretting this decision at all. I am happy to be working part-time at my amazing church, and spending the bulk of my time loving my children and my husband well. But still, as I am settling into a schedule (mostly by force – I need that routine!) I still have so much unstructured time. I’m used to cramming my lunch in 18 minutes, multi-tasking like a boss, holding my bladder for an abnormally long time, and changing what I’m teaching (read: living, breathing, doing, thinking about) every 40 minutes – and often sooner than that.

But you know what else I was used to? Being drained at 3:00pm. Working some nights after working all day. Thinking about the needs, wants, thoughts, and jibes of hundreds of children that weren’t mine. Missing my own children all day while I was off taking care of someone else’s. Feeling bad that I had nothing left for my family after I’d spent myself on my job.

That last one was my kicker. Because truly, I enjoy working. I love having a schedule (there it is again), having a reason to leave the house every day, and sowing into something outside my home and family. I love teaching, and the opportunities the job gave me to really love on some kids who needed it. I love instilling knowledge and love of music into kids who need something at school for be good at, when math and reading don’t come easily. But for right now, Hubby and my own kids are what I need to focus on.

I respect you, working moms – especially teaching moms, because I have been among your ranks, in those trenches with you. But I am incredibly grateful that I could make the decision to leave you for a while. I’ll return, but right now, I’m thinking of you as a wrangle my ridiculously strong son into his clothes for the day, make several breakfasts and eat whatever the kids don’t, and microwave my coffee for the third time.  I’m thinking of you, because I know many of you are happily at jobs you love, knowing your kids are happy in their schools and day cares or with daddies and nannies. I’m thinking of you, also, if you’re wishing you were doing what I’m doing but it’s not possible. While it’s weird that I’m not back to school, I choose to rest in the unstructured craziness and enjoy it.

faith, mommyhood, random thoughts

Currently.

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What my days look like. See "wishing".
What my days look like. See “wishing”.

Here is my second Currently. post to link up with A Mama Collective and When At Home! I love being able to connect with so many awesome writers and believers and thinkers and doers. Y’all are really, really wonderful.

I am currently:

thinking about my family. Not just Hubby and the kids, but also my parents, my grandparents (of which I have only one living, but three dearly loved and missed), my great grandparents (two of whom I knew well), my brother, my aunts and uncles and cousins… We have a circle of love and support, a tight bond that can only be forged by doing life together. Living so far away from them and missing things and coming home not as often as I thought I would has only made me think more about spending intentional time with them, wherever it is spent.

reading Dragonfly in Amber. It’s the second book in the Outlander series. My mom and one of my best friends (and 947204275 other women) read these when they came out, and I am just now reading them for the first time – partially because now that Starz is making a series about them, I want to SEE it, not just read it! So far, I’m a third of the way in, and it’s a little more slow-going than Outlander was, but I’m still in it to win it.

eating banana bread and macarons. I am in the middle of finding all the banana bread recipes I can, and make them healthier without losing their yum factor. Also, on the subject of macarons, my best friend Lauren is in a macaron-making swing, so naturally I’m on the helping and receiving side of that. Let me not complain!

loving this fall weather. NC hasn’t seen as much fall yet as some more northern states have I suppose, but it’s definitely cooling off a little, and I’m seeing a few yellow and orange leaves. Also, the temperature drop has really helped my running (read: I’m not as miserable doing it) because I tire less easily and I pick up the pace when I’m not sweating into my eyes and stopping to take a drink every 12 feet.

wishing my sweet daughter would extend her sweetness to her brother. Every time he gets near her, there’s a squeal almost at the pitch that only dogs can hear. And he adores her. I just want her to tolerate him a little, ya know?

watching all of those lovely shows I’ve been missing all summer. The shows Hubby and I are excited to start again include Modern Family, New Girl, Once Upon a Time, Parks and Recreation (SO SAD it’s on it’s last season!), Grimm, and 30 Rock.

listening to Citipointe Live. They’re an Australian Hillsong-like group that writes tons of worship music. A friend recommended them to me for possible new worship songs for church, and I was happy to listen to several great tunes to share with the worship team!

anticipating fall and winter and CHRISTMAS! I know, Halloween isn’t even here yet, but fall/winter weather and holidays are my favorite (yes, Hubby and I both have birthdays in there) and Advent through Christmas is by far my favorite few weeks of the year.

thankful for my incredible Hubby. When he found out that my grandmother had passed and I needed to get to GA, he cancelled his weekend, helped make a plan and pack, drove all the way here, and has done everything he can for the past few days to make my life a little less stressful. He is the biggest supporter and encourager I have, and I don’t know where I’d be without him. Love you, babe.

There ya have it – what’s happening with me Currently. in a nutshell. What are you doing currently?

mommyhood, music, random thoughts

Currently

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I’m an avid reader of Kristen’s, over at When At Home. This week, she co-hosted a link party, and we are all sharing what is going on with us currently. I am currently:

thinking about my new role as stay at home mom. I’ve always been the one who worked all day (teaching) and now I’m all of a sudden not the money maker, the worker, or the go-outside-the-house-and-do-things-er. I am reinventing my schedule, my perspective, my identity aside from a job.

listening to a lot of Jesus Culture and Bethel, trying to add some new songs to my worship set lists. I love their hearts, their leading ladies and the versatility of their songs. Mmmm, so good.

reading the Outlander series – specifically, I’m still in the first book. I had friends and family members who had read them ages ago, and have raved about them for years. Now that the tv series is coming out, I figured it was time.

thankful for the stages of life that my kids are in. EK is becoming more and more independent (and curious and brave and insolent, haha) every day. J is really mommyfied (I think my mom coined this term, for me at least) but it’s actually sweet most of the time.

photographing my kids, all day every day. Well, not that much. But they are easily the cutest thing I see all day, and they change so quickly, and do new cool things so often that I feel like I need to document it!

There ya have it! Check out When At Home because I love it and you will, too. And while you’re here, tell me what you’re up to lately!

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

It just takes one. And sometimes, that one is you.

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If you’ve been reading my blog, you know that I’ve been writing for My Big Jesus once a week or so. You also know that I love Jesus. You ALSO know a lot about me. So, you won’t be that surprised when I tell you that I had a total Jesus moment today.

I was at church for a worship team meeting, and was stopped on my way out by one of the sweetest ladies ever. She’s a long-time buddy of my mother-in-law, watched Hubby grow up, and is a fixture of wonderful ministry at our church. She had a really cool story to tell me.

She had seen my post Like a Litter of Puppies on My Big Jesus, loved it, and shared it with her kids (who are a little older than me). Her daughter, who had read it, got a call from a friend who was in shock at finding out she was (unexpectedly!) pregnant with her fourth child. Can you imagine?! You have three kids. You think you’re all set., then BOOM. One more is coming! She obviously is going to love that fourth child, but you can see why it’s a shock, right? So anyway, the daughter sends my post about Hubby and his brothers being like puppies, and big families and close siblings, and she is totally encouraged! She was blessed by the words that The Lord had put on my heart. That blows my mind.

This story is an inspiration to those of us who desire to bring people closer to God. Whenever I write a post like that, for My Big Jesus or just for my own blog on a whim, I hope it touches one life. If my words reach one life, encourage one soul, spark one mind, or help heal one heart, I am satisfied. Sometimes when I write, that one person touched is, in fact, me. Other times, it’s a friend who saw me link it on Facebook. Or even still, a total stranger, like the story today. It was a very “six-degrees-of-separation” feeling to know that a friend of a friend of a friend read it and was touched. But that’s why I’m doing this! I wrote that post just for her, in that moment of her life, when she needed to hear a little encouragement in a situation in the midst of which she was surprised to find herself. I never know who you are that needs to hear this, but hey – this one’s for you.

faith, My Big Jesus, random thoughts

Do You Know a Robin Williams?

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I read an article by Jeff Gissing this morning on MyBigJesus.com that was my favorite thing I’ve read since we heard that Robin Williams took his own life. It’s short, so no excuses not to read it.  The idea is simple – depression sucks, and it isn’t our job to judge people who deal with it different ways. The last line, “let’s ask God to soften our hearts toward those who suffer.” really spoke to me. How often are we quick to make a judgment or an assumption about someone? How often to we make a generalization without knowing the facts?

I’m sure I know people who struggle with depression and don’t tell me. I’m sure there are people in my life who have battled it and battled it some more. In ignorance I’ve probably made a judgment I shouldn’t have; I am also to blame. Yes, there are meds for depression. No, they don’t work for every person in every situation. Yes, there are other ways to deal with it. No, those don’t always work either. But I also know that there are people willing to help. There are places you can go, people you can call, and One who always desires to help and be there for His children.

I will not say that there is a perfect cure, or that a solution can always be found. I know that isn’t the case. But I also know that if you aren’t looking for help, you will rarely find it. So take the first step. If you know someone who struggles with depression, or other mental illness, help them take the first step. I know that if someone I loved was struggling, I would want to help them. I would reach out and take the step for them, if possible.

So throw no stones, pass no judgment. It’s unfortunate that celebrities get the worst of our scrutiny simply because their lives are all over the media for us to see. But we don’t know the details, the length of the struggle, the depth of the depression. We can only offer to help fight the battle, and honor the lives of those whose battle is over.

faith, My Big Jesus

My Big Jesus

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I am really excited to share about a new opportunity I’ve been given. I’ve been asked (and I accepted!) to be a contributor for the My Big Jesus project – a blog about our big Jesus, who is reconciling us to himself, and blowing our minds with his forgiveness and blessing. I will be writing a few times a month, and releasing the content here on We’re Only Hsuman and on My Big Jesus as well. There are several more contributors, and also features from other blogs. All around, it’s going to be a large-scale story of redemption for people and all parts of culture. It’s gonna be… big. So like them on Facebook, follow them on Twitter (@MyBigJesus) and sign up for the newsletter on the blog!

Stay tuned for posts that say “This post appeared on http://www.MyBigJesus.com” to know which ones are featured!