In my women’s small group this morning, we were talking about getting stuck in a performance-driven lifestyle. To be clear, that’s a feeling of needing to be productive, having something to show for your time. It’s a very American ideal, I think. We like to show how much we can squeeze into a day, how many things we can check off a to-do list.
One of the gals was talking about how she gets really frustrated when there’s a lot to do, and she’s not able to get working on it, and get her family on board with working on it. And I totally got it. She was saying she felt like the Lord was teaching her something about “rest” and valuing efficiency and productivity – how her worth was not tied to her performance.
Wow.
First of all, the Lord teaching her about rest? Read my thoughts on that here because I think the Lord’s giving me some new perspective on that as well. But secondly, as a musician (read: perfectionist) I have always been a performance-based person. I’ve been up in front of audiences, wondering what they think, trying to please them. It’s been my education and my job to do so. To hear her speak about not finding her worth in her kids’ behavior, the cleanliness of her home or the extravagance of her cooking… but to find her worth in the unconditional love we receive from our Father? Okay. I’ve been convicted.
How often do I find myself getting frustrated about little things that my kids do? Or how often do I feel guilty because I forgot about the clothes I put in the washer until they needed to be washed again? Worse still, how often do I feel like I have wasted my time during the day because all I feel like I did was change diapers, clean up messes and cut grapes into quarters?
What if we could change our thinking from checking off lists and seeing our progress to one of knowing from the inside out that we are loved, accepted, and treasured by our Creator?