Tag Archives: boys

He Is Secure, Even If I’m Not

This post also appeared on My Big Jesus!  

 This weekend, unbeknownst to me, Hubby transitioned my little tiny baby J into his big boy bed.

Okay, so he’s not so tiny. But he’s still a baby, right?!

J won’t be two till just after Christmas, and even though he has an actually tiny baby brother, he himself is still a baby. A toddler, maybe, but in many ways still a baby. He needs snuggles and has warm milk at nap time and won’t use the potty and should still be contained in his crib. 

But while I was out on Saturday, Christmas shopping with my sisters-in-law and my mother-in-law, Hubby put J down for a nap in the queen-sized bed (that’s already in his room for lack of another place to put it). We had been talking about moving him into it, and letting J get used to the idea, but hadn’t made any real plan for when it would happen.

With EK, we tried to move her to a big girl bed too early. We were preparing for J’s arrival, and just couldn’t get her to stay in her big girl room, so she slept in his nursery even after he was a couple of weeks old. She wasn’t ready, and she was not going to sleep there until she decided it was time.

Now on Saturday (with no warning, may I add), I just received a picture text from Hubby of the video monitor, pointed at the bed, with a tiny spot of J somewhere near the headboard. I couldn’t believe it! Tears came to my eyes when I thought of my little baby boy, asleep in that giant bed, without me snuggling next to him. Surely he can’t be ready! He must feel so scared alone in that huge bed!

But he wasn’t scared or sad. He was ready. I was the one who wasn’t.

Upon further conversation, I learned that he didn’t go immediately to sleep, but he slept soundly once he was. He has even spent two nights and another nap in the bed, only escaping the room a couple of times before drifting off.

He isn’t even my last baby, but I’m not ready to lose the crib. What if he misses it? What if he asks to sleep there? But it’s my security blanket, not his. I’m the one that wants to hold him back. But he knows that his needs will be met, his fears will be stilled, and he can be brave because he is loved and taken care of. He is secure.

I’m not ready yet!

Last night, it happened. Instead of wanting a snuggle and a song tonight, J just wanted to go to bed.

I wasn’t ready for this. He’s my baby! My little tiny boy, who loves snuggles and kisses and resting his head on mama’s chest while she sings!

Granted, he was totally pooped. We had had dinner at our friends’ house, where he also jumped on the trampoline and chased the dog all night. He was more exhausted than normal at bedtime. He even ran amok around the basement right up until the moment I scooped him up and went into his dark bedroom. When I leaned over the crib to get his swaddle, he just sort of lurched forward into the crib – to be honest, I almost lost my hold on him and dropped him in there for real. He just reached down in there, and so I said, “Do you want to just lay down?” and he answered in his little “yes” grunts.

Breaking a mama’s heart.

After I read and sang to EK (at least someone needs it!) I texted my friend Ginna (whose house we had been at), and told her about it. Her response? Yay for another little one on the way, and I will get snuggles for months. That’s a good friend with the perfect reminder! But still… here’s hoping that it was just a fluke, and he’ll still need some snuggles tonight. I’m not ready for my baby to be a big boy.

5 Reasons I’m Excited About Having Another….

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Yes, it’s true! The Hsu Crew is adding another bouncing, baby boy to our ranks. And we couldn’t be more excited! We obviously would have been thrilled with a baby girl (especially to reuse some of the adorable clothes EK has grown out of) but we were ecstatic to hear we’ve got another boy to wrangle! That was a little bit of a perk that came along with the genetics test we had to take – it always tells the gender! So here are my reasons I’m excited for another little boy:

1. I’ll have a second chance on bowties. J’s neck got too big for baby bowties almost immediately, and I feel like I lost the whole “newborns-don’t-care-what-they-wear” phase to a fat neck and thighs so big half his pants wouldn’t fit (that’s still happening). I digress.

2. Boys playing – and fighting – together. I’ve basically heard that boys play together really well, and that girls have a lot of drama, and boys just duke it out and it’s over quickly. I’m kinda looking forward to most of the conflicts being resolved quickly.

3. Planes, trains and automobiles. We love cars and trucks and construction vehicles, Legos and blocks, and tool sets. EK does too, so that’s an extra plus. But it’s nice to know that those toys we’ve started to accumulate are going to get a lot more use. (And, my brother was a big Thomas the Tank Engine fan, so we have access to a TON of trains and tracks. Win.)

4. EK can still be the resident princess. My daughter’s diva status will go unchallenged. Right now, we’re trying to look at this like a plus. We are certainly aware that it could turn into a negative thing. We will cross that bridge if we must.

My little diva, in her element.
My little diva, in her element.

5. Boys love their mamas. Sometimes this can be detrimental (as in, big time mommy attachment, and huge adjustment for my elder son) but usually it’s just plain sweet how much little boys love their mamas.

My little guy, just learning to sit up. Those were the days, am I right?
My little guy, just learning to sit up. Those were the days, am I right?

Do you have a little boy? More than one? Do you agree with my excitement for having two?! Or have anything to add?

When He Misses Me

*This post also appeared on MyBigJesus.com *


The other night, Hubby and I went out to his high school reunion. We got in late, were very tired, and looking forward to being able to sleep in a little bit (my early-rising family is in town and they tend to take the kids when they wake up, allowing for a few minutes of extra sleep in the mornings). However, I wake to cries from my son at 5:22 (yes, exactly that time) and trudge sleepily into his room to see what was the matter.

He was very upset, that much I could tell, but at 11 months, how much can he communicate with me? I just rubbed his back, hummed, and rocked in the chair, hoping he’d calm down and I could lay him down soon. He dozed off a few minutes later, but my attempt to lay him down was futile. Immediately his head popped up and his eyes searched the room for me. Resigned to a little while longer in the rocker instead of my bed, I grabbed my pillow and a few of his little blankets, snuggled down and covered us up as best I could.

As I rocked and hummed and rocked some more, it occurred to me that maybe he just missed me. That probably wasn’t what woke him up initially, but that’s why he wanted to snuggle (he’s usually way too busy for that) and that’s why he wouldn’t let me put him down.

You see, my family (my parents, siblings, grandmother, aunt, uncle and cousin) have all been in town for Thanksgiving. They’ve thrown off the groove (in a good way, I might add!) by changing diapers and giving snuggles and playing and babysitting, instead of the normal routine of just Hubby and me being around. J just felt like he wasn’t getting his normal amount of Mama Time and needed me to himself for a few minutes.

After we had dozed in that chair till about 8:00, my mom came in to make sure we were alright. She hadn’t wanted to disturb what she knew would be the sweetest snuggles I’d get for a while. 11-month-old boys are… indefatigable… and too busy getting into messes to snuggle their moms. Except when they know it’s been too long.