Finding out that you’re pregnant when you’re only four weeks along is no joke. Why did I even take the test, you ask? Well, because I was already feeling exhausted and downright strange. I knew we had been “not not trying”. (That’s my term for not planning out days to try to conceive, but also not being on birth control. “Letting it happen” basically.) So when I was feeling extra tired and a little, well, crappy, I took a chance and peed on the stick. A FULL WEEK before my period was supposed to start. And guess what, folks? I was pregnant! Right there at four weeks. So early I knew it’d be silly to tell, but already so excited I couldn’t contain myself. That’s why when my friend Stephanie mentioned to me (in secret at the time) the next day that she was also expecting her third (10 weeks along. She was totally in the clear.) I was like “AHHH! ME TOO!!” because I knew she could keep my secret. That’s why in my “8 Truths About Being Pregnant” post, I wrote about having a secret keeper. Women are communicators. And when you have big news like this, that is totally life changing, yet you’re supposed to keep it to yourself, it’s damned near impossible. So choose a secret keeper to blab your news to and chat about plans with. It’s always a nice thing to share your news with a loved one who will pray with you, be excited for you, and check up on you till you share your news with everyone else.
Anyway, for the first week after I found out, all Hubby and I could talk about was how we were ever going to keep it quiet (no caffeine? no alcohol?) until I was at least 10 weeks along. We were devising plans, thinking of “mocktails” (which is ridiculous because I’m a wine and beer gal, not much girly liquor drinking for me) and trying our hardest to think of excuses for “being super healthy” since it was during the holidays. In hind sight, I should’ve been coming up with excuses for why I needed so many naps… that’s what’s been the most obvious, but maybe everyone doesn’t know I’m taking these naps…
Anyway, that’s it for today. If you’re enjoying hearing about the past few weeks you’ve missed, check the blog tomorrow for more!
This post also appeared on MyBigJesus.com so check it out there, too!
I have a theory about moms and their social lives. It’s that most moms have five groups of people in their social networks. I’ll describe them a bit for you:
1. Friends from before you had kids. Notice I didn’t bother to separate these into high school friends, college friends, work friends, etc. They’re all lumped together now in a group of “they’ve known me as a woman before she was a mom”.
2. Friends you made because you were pregnant at the same time. Perhaps you met these friends at your birthing classes. Possibly, you had the same doctor and ran into each other a lot. Maybe you’re like me, and you met them at prenatal yoga. Or just maybe, you just looked at each other, in the middle of Babies R Us, that registering “gun” in your hand, staring at the wall full of seemingly identical sippy cups, and just laughed together.
3. Friends you made because they also have kids. These are the friends that you were acquainted with, but you’d never really gotten to know before, until you realized your kids were similar ages, and wow! you live in the same neighborhood! Neighborhood park play date, anyone? (Note: They might also be the ones that you keep calling and asking your random “Is this normal?” type questions. And that’s okay, too.)
4. Friends you made because your kids are friends with theirs. Since my kids are young, I haven’t delved too far into this one yet myself, but these are friend you’ve made simply because your kids request to hang out with their kids. Lots of times, that means you and that other mom are gonna get a lot of quality time together, so I hope for your sake she’s cool.
5. Friends that belong in more than one of these groups. These are usually the favorites. Your best friend from college got pregnant at the same time as you. Your community group at church has a couple of moms with kids that are similarly aged. Your kids have had so many play dates with your prenatal yoga friends’ kids that they’re basically best friends now, too.
This fifth group is the one that I say “does life together”. Not that you can’t do life with someone in a different stage of life than you… you absolutely can. But isn’t it easier to relate to someone else who also has a toddler and a newborn, who can relate to the sleep-deprived craziness? Isn’t it more comforting to call a fellow mom to pray for you about your child having night terrors? It just makes more sense to ask another mom advice about getting your four-month-old to sleep through the night.
This group, network, tribe… these are the prayer warriors, the comforters, the make-you-feel-better-ers, and the caretakers on standby. These are the ones who will have coffee with you after preschool drop off in their pjs. They’re the ones who will immediately answer your message at 4:00am, because they’re also up nursing a baby. They’re the ones who will tell you it’s okay to cry over spilled milk sometimes, and your potty-training problems will be over before you know it, who will let you drop off your toddler for an hour while you go to the dentist, and who will remind you that those little mess-making devils are the ones you love, even on their messiest, most devious days – yes, even after you’ve stepped on the twenty-seventh Lego.
A couple of weekends ago, I went to the mountains (Asheville, NC to be exact) with my college girlfriends for about 24 hours. Y’all. It’s the first baby-free 24 hours I’ve had since September. I know, I’m probably spoiled getting away twice in a matter of four months, but I digress.
We had planned to spend a day and a night together before the Christmas rush to catch up, sleep late, eat like the foodies we are, drink wine and shop. It was a great trip: beautiful weather, wonderful friends (we’ve been friends for ten years!) and just enough excitement to make me glad I wasn’t lugging two extra bodies around.
Until I’d gotten through 19 or so of the 24 hours. And then I missed those extra little bodies. No one was tugging at my shirt from around my knees, no one had needed to potty, no sippy cups misplaced, no diapers were changed, and no one had cried because their nap time was off. But then again, no one randomly wanted hugs and kisses, ate the rest of my sandwich I couldn’t finish, charmed strangers with his giggles, or gave a hilarious misnomer to an item she saw in a storefront. Hubby was sending me pictures of the three of them, having a grand time wearing superhero capes and having dance parties. I know, I shouldn’t complain. I was sitting in front of the fire at the Grove Park Inn, sipping hot chocolate. Still, I digress.
When you create two little beings, they are such a part of you that there’s no not missing them. There’s no glad you haven’t seen them in a while or relieved you aren’t changing diapers and scrambling eggs right now. I don’t think it’s a routine thing either… I don’t miss them because they’re a part of my routine and I’m a scheduled person. I miss them because they’re a part of me. They’re my favorite people. They’re opening my eyes to the world that they see and the feelings they’re discovering for the first time, not to mention milestones like learning to walk or pooping in the potty that I might be missing!
I also know that time with adults (read: people with wider vocabularies) and time to be by myself is healthy. I know that getting a full night’s sleep is a good thing, as is building and keeping up relationship with women that I love. It was a relaxing and rejuvenating time; we are an easy-going group, who all know each other well enough that we can skip pleasantries and get straight to what’s going on in our lives. And since we’re all at different points in our lives (ie: I’m the only mom) it’s fun to hear about things that we’ve passed, or things we haven’t come to yet. It’s good for me to remember that my life isn’t only inside my four walls with the three people I see most often. It stretches and encourages me that not all of us are in the same trenches.
Who says when you grow up, you don’t like taking hilarious photos?
Earlier tonight, Hubby, the kids and I went to a party that happens almost every year at my dear friend Shawn’s house. I regret that I didn’t get a picture of her on my phone… she got it on hers. If I get it, I’ll post it!
Anyway, she has had a hard year or two, and the fact that she stills throws this amazing (sometimes-annual) tree-trimming party makes me so happy. She is an incredible woman of God and I value any amount of time I can spend with her… which sometimes isn’t a lot, sadly. I lived with her for three months in college, and stayed with her here and there after that, and her family has taken me in as one of their own. I Coincidentally (not really haha), it’s her husband’s company that’s doing our basement reno! But tonight it was wonderful to see her and share a few moments with her and some other friends we love to see. So for your enjoyment, here are a few Christmas party pictures…
A photo with the bestie is always necessary.College roomies, hanging out twice in one week! THAT is a Christmas miracle, friends.
Just your regular attempt to get a four-person selfie. At least the “crazy face” memo wasn’t forgotten by anyone.
EK had so many cookies. So. Many. Cookies.
Even though you can only see half of EK’s face, everyone is smiling. #totalwin
Hubby busted out a tacky sweatshirt, so I ran over to Goodwill and scored that amazing vest. $3, thank you very much! And the kiddos were all decked out in festive attire, so we decided to get a family photo! You see how well it worked out…
OH! I forgot to ask… how do y’all like the sassy new hair? I had mixed feelings about it – still do, truly. It’s shorter on the one side than it’s ever been, but I like that if I don’t want to go sassy, I just curl the longer side under like I did before, and it’s a little more tame. But I like the sass; who am I kidding?
J’s fall outfit from Thanksgiving dinner with Hubby’s family last night. My baby blue eyes ❤
Today, I challenge you to love your family a little extra, hug your friends one more time than you normally would, savor the flavor of your favorite dish, and linger in a moment of celebration. Reach deep down and find things you’re grateful for… even if you don’t have much. Holidays can be tough. Families can be complicated. Budgets can be tight. Expectations and tensions can be high. Sometimes, holiday gatherings can bring out less than the best in us.
But find a few simple things to thank God for today. The laughter of a child. The smile of a grandparent. An encouraging word from a friend. The chance to sit down for a few minutes with a friend. Hey, you might even get a start on your Christmas decorating today! Take the extra sets of hands, and put them to work. If you are the extra set of hands, then do a little work for someone else. Soften your words as you speak them and show some love. Everyone’s Thanksgiving will be a little better. Good luck, safe travels, happy eating, and have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Yep, it’s that time again. Time for another parenting fail. Although it may not be as much of a fail as a “Oh my gosh did that actually happen?!”
I’ll set up the week for you – normally, my kids have (for months) pooped once a day, right when they get up in the morning. One morning this week, they had BOTH, within sheer minutes of each other, had the sort of poop where you throw away the pajamas and put them straight into the bathtub. Yes, I literally threw away both sets of pajamas that same morning because it was easier than cleaning it out. But after that day, it seemed that they were pooping – imagine me saying this out loud in my best accent – ALL. DAY. E’RY. DAY. My best friend suggested maybe they’re eating too much fruit and getting too much fiber. I say, eh, they’ve always eaten a ton of fruit. Who knows.
So anyway, both kids are basically to the point in their lives that I don’t keep extra changes of clothes for them. When they’re newborns and spitting up and pooping that liquid poop, you sorta have to. But at this point, EK isn’t wearing panties yet, still in Pull-Ups, so no worries there, and J’s biggest problem is his knees are always dirty. Who cares about that, right? So that being said, by some freak (beautiful) accident, I had an extra pair of pants in the diaper bag when we went out to dinner last night with a couple of friends.
Blurry and devious J and Lauren. He’s thinking about what’s gonna happen in a minute…
Blurry but adorable EK and Aida! This was pre-potty problems.
What a yummy – and needed – margarita!
The kids, y’all, were angels. This place is pretty casual (it’s called The Porch Kitchen and Cantina… Tex-Mex, order at the counter, loud and bustling. We love it.) so the kids could make a little noise and no one was bothered. They ate really well, and were patient while we ate (which rarely happens, am I right?) so I’m thinking we’ve just had the perfect evening. Well, EK asks to go potty, so my friend Aida volunteers to take her. A few minutes after they left, J is squirming pretty awfully so I pull him out of the highchair and notice that he is stinky. So naturally I grab a diaper and wipes, and head to the bathroom. When I get there, Aida says, “Oh thank you! I didn’t know how to get help!” EK is on the changing table, no diaper, with poop on her legs. (Let’s all say a nice, “Poor Aida!”) Apparently, she had pooped a little in the potty – accidentally, of course – and it startled her, so she asked to get off the potty, and then did the rest in her Pull-Up. Then Aida didn’t have a new diaper or wipes to clean her up with. So I hand J to A, clean EK up and put her in the new diaper (the only diaper I had brought).
I take off J’s pants and realize the amount of poop he had was no joke. It’s on his clothes, shirt and pants. I send Aida for new clothes and a fresh diaper, and try to attack his mess. I literally think that I used most of the wipes cleaning up either J or the diaper station. (Yes I cleaned it up. No, you don’t have to worry about there being poop all over and it getting on your kid the next time you eat lunch there.) Aida comes back with the pants that were magically still in my bag, and his coat. Sorry, J, no shirt.
So he’s clean. EK is clean. I get back to the table, and the Hubby of the year looks at me and says, “Do you want me to take the kids home, and you girls can stay out and have a drink?”
Today I’m linking up (belatedly haha) with Hannah at Joyful Life for the next installment of the Currently series. I love building community with these fantastic bloggers who inspire me. Join us!
T H I N K I N G || As you might know, I’ve been training for a 10K that’s on October 25th. I ran 6.23 miles (just a little over) on Monday for the first time – usually I have been doing between 4 and 5 miles – and it killed me. I am still sore. I thought that when I lost the stroller (I usually run with my double jogger and both kids) the last mile and a half would come easily. It didn’t. I managed to finish, but I was really dragging my booty at the end. I’m hoping I can get at least three more of those actual 10k-length runs in between now and the race. I’m not going for a certain time… I just want to finish!
M A K I N G || This makes me think of crafting… but Lord knows I haven’t been doing that. I love to craft, but just haven’t had the time. I will stick with making friends. Building relationships. That’s a good thing to be making, right? I’ve been learning more about the gals in my women’s small group and I love it!
A N T I C I P A T I N G || I’m really looking forward to church this Sunday. I’m leading worship at a different service since J and his cousins are getting baptized, and all of our family will be in town. It’s going to be a joyous occasion all around!
W E A R I N G || Scarves. And. Boots. And. Boots. And. Scarves. Seriously. I’m wrecked because the weather hasn’t really gotten that cool for more than a few hours at a time, so I’m sweating in my boots and scarves. Oh well, it’s October, and I’m in the right and the weather is in the wrong.
T H A N K F U L F O R || I’m thankful right now for a mother-in-law that I not only get along with really well, but who also speaks truth and goodness into me, Hubby and the kids. She’s a fantastic lady, and she is one of the reasons our family is so darn awesome.
Here’s a little glimpse of our fall photo session from last Saturday. I’ll go into detail about it later… But we love working with Sophie Van Zandt – the best 16-year-old photographer you’ve ever seen! She always cranks out tons of cute photos of my kids and our family.
I love linking up with Jenna at A Mama Collective and all the other fantastic gals for the Currently series. Here goes nothin’!
Thinking about high school. I never really reminisce like this, but my ten-year reunion was this past weekend. I saw some great people I haven’t seen in years, and partied with some good friends (and teachers!) that I don’t get to see often. On the one hand, I love seeing people in person and looking into their eyes while we catch up. On the other hand, thank goodness for social media because otherwise I’d have reverted into my awkward, high school self because I wouldn’t have known anything about anyone’s life nowadays. It was actually easier because I knew a little bit and was able to make conversation. Anyway, it was a blast. I loved reconnecting with several people I never get to see.
Listening to Kari Jobe singing “Forever” by Bethel Music. Here’s the link for my favorite video:
This song (we actually talked about in our worship team meeting last week) is a perfect example of a great worship song. Structurally, dynamically, lyrically, and just in the open-ended nature and worship opportunity that the song creates. One of my favorite things is that it all starts with a reflection on the cross. In short, I am digging it.
Thankful for Hubby. I’m always thankful for him, but I’m in a season right now of really appreciating the way he loves me well, the love he has (and shows!) for our kids, and the commitment he has to our family. He is an excellent man, folks.
Loving the fact that TV has started back up for the fall. I know that’s a silly thing, but I am so happy!
Enjoying my new small groups. Hubby and I are a part of a community group that meets every other Sunday. Six couples, all in different stages of life, and I love it. Such fun people! I’m also in a new women’s small group on Thursday mornings. The gals I got linked with are great, different ages/walks of life, some I know and some I don’t yet. It’s already been fun, and we’ve only met twice! Yay for beginning this year full of great new relationships!
Doing life with my mama friends these past couple of months has been awesome. For instance, this morning, my friend Steph popped in for a cup of coffee after dropping her son off at preschool. We just visited, chatted and watched the kids play. I love being so close to her (geographically and as friends) that she can pop over while I’m still in my pajamas and we can just drink coffee and be.
Join the link up party! What are you up to Currently?
Obviously, there is no such thing as the perfect day. There is no 24-hour time span that goes exactly how you’d like it to, or exactly as you planned. However, there are days, from wake up to bed time, that seem to go pretty darn well. This is one of those days.
When I got up this morning, it was to the sound of J fussing (he had probably started out talking, but I was too asleep to hear it) and EK running around (she’s taken to not visiting me before she visits her toys). Hubby had a gig last night, so I let him snooze. I fed the kids breakfast, while putting on my running gear one piece at a time in between bites… EK’s toast in the oven, one sock. A few bites of fruit for J, the other sock. Grapes washed and given to EK, the sports bra is on. You get the point. Finally, everyone was fed, packed in the stroller, and we were off for one of my favorite things: a long, cool, morning run. This 10-degree cool off in the weather has been a saving grace for my running skills. Ain’t nobody got time for an Indian summer.
Recently, I’ve been running to the grocery store in the mornings. There are several reasons for this, not the least of which is that it gives me a bathroom break. It gives EK a chance to get out and walk around, and there’s always at least one thing that I discover we are out of, or I am randomly craving. So we run to the grocery store. I usually take a 2-mile route to get there, shop it up for 15-20 minutes, and then run a (different) 2-mile route home. It’s a nice process, I think. Anyway…
I can’t believe we forgot something… There’s no room for anything else!
We get home, and two of my girlfriends come over for homemade pumpkin spice lattes. I came across this amazing-sounding recipe (check it out here, from Mama Natural) and the girls said they wanted to try it. So we spent an hour and a half making our lattes and chatting. Super nice. During this time, J went down for a morning nap and Hubby woke up, so life continued in the Hsu house as normal.
Hubby and I got to thinking about EK’s room, and how it’s oddly put together. When we put her in there, we weren’t sure how sleeping in a “big girl bed” was going to go. It’s a full size bed, and now she’s used to it, so we decided to make it look nicer (perk: deep clean the room in the process). We rearranged her furniture and vacuumed, dusted, etc. It’s adorable, functional, and she loves it. Win.
J woke up, and EK wanted to try out her new bed placement, so we swapped them out. While she was sleeping, we ate a stellar take out lunch (Vietnamese pho – a revelation), we ushered Hubby off to work with smooches and waves, and J let me take a shower without crying a lot (thanks, little guy!). I call that a productive two hours.
EK woke up, and J was ready to nap round 2. While he was asleep, EK and I got some quality time together baking. We made pumpkin muffins and banana bread (both clean recipes, check them out here and here). Both turned out well… muffins stuck to their cups a little but tasted delicious, and the banana bread was perfect, as usual. That recipe is bangarang.
the baking fairyclean pumpkin muffins and banana bread – here’s to a healthy week!
When J woke up, I packed up my sweeties and headed downtown to meet some family and friends at the Texas Pete Culinary Arts Festival. For those of you not from around here, Texas Pete is our local hot sauce, and the festival invited all the best restaurants in town to have booths of Texas Pete-inspired dishes. Also there was beer, served especially by our sweet friend Aida. So basically, it was a great evening of yummy food and great friends, adults and babies alike. My sister-in-law Holly and her son Finley were there, as well as a long-time church friend Abby and her little girl, Elliott. Having time with girlfriends and their babies really is the best of both worlds.
When we headed home, there was a mini-meltdown moment, spurred on by the fact that I forgot I needed gas in my car (come on, Mom! Rookie mistake!) but we made it home, had a quick bath time, and both kids were out by 8:30. I call that a great day. Everyone got the play and the rest and the snuggles and the exercise they needed. There wasn’t a sacred Double Nap but there was one-on-one time for me with both kiddos, and sometimes that’s hard to come by.
J and me with Abby and Elliott (they’re gonna get married)
So here’s your encouragement: despite the meltdowns, despite the fact you forgot something at the store yesterday, and despite the fact that you’re on your own with those beasts all day, make the best of it. Look for the fun and the good, and don’t worry that you didn’t do laundry or dishes. You had fun. So did they. No one missed anything. Praise the Lord.
No point in being too detailed about a weekend at the beach. We enjoyed the sunshine, saw a wedding from our hotel room, ate delicious seafood, sipped delicious cocktails, got a little sunburned, and enjoyed each other’s company. We hadn’t had time together like that in years, and it was fabulous.
My sweet bestie, Lauren.Cocktail of the weekend: Prosecco and peach juice. A simpler bellini.A storm rolling in, and back out. Make way for the sunshine.Seafood feast in the form of a low-country boil.The ocean is one of the most amazing things the Lord created.
Overall it was a lovely, relaxing weekend. I’m already aching to do it again soon.
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