Tag Archives: kids

home, mommyhood, random thoughts

Happy Halloween!

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Since today is Halloween, but I haven’t dressed my kids up yet, here are a few photos from Halloweens past… Enjoy!

Not a great photo, but one of my favorite costumes ever. The first year we were married, Hubby and I were the Incredibles. Stay tuned to see it again in a year or two, plus the kids!

Not a great photo, but one of my favorite costumes ever. The first year we were married, Hubby and I were the Incredibles. Stay tuned to see it again in a year or two, plus the kids!

 

Here's a shot of Hubby's whole costume!Here’s a shot of Hubby’s whole costume! That’s a proud moment of making those costumes ourselves!

Lady Gaga was one of my most fun costumes, and the only thing I bought was the wig!

Lady Gaga was one of my most fun costumes, and the only thing I bought was the wig!

The year I was pregnant I was just growing out of my clothes, so I wanted something silly. Reverse Cowgirl it was! Kelly (on the right here, and on the right in the one above) and I always get pictures together!The year I was pregnant I was just growing out of my clothes, so I wanted something silly. Reverse Cowgirl it was! Kelly (on the right here, and on the right in the one above) and I always get pictures together!

Ella Kate's first Halloween - Photo cred. Sophie Van ZandtElla Kate’s first Halloween – and you can hardly find her, haha!
Photo cred. Sophie Van Zandt

Last year, Hubby was Sully and EK was Boo. I ran out of time before turning my belly into Mike... but my two loves looked great!Last year, Hubby was Sully and EK was Boo. I ran out of time before turning my belly into Mike… but my two loves looked great, and EK had fun at our church’s Trunk or Treat event. That’s where we’re headed tonight, so you’ll see pictures soon!

What are you dressing up as this year? What are your kids going to be? How many Elsas have you seen?!

faith, mommyhood

I have a quick temper.

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I’ve been trying to be a better mommy to my two year old. We work on sharing, letters and numbers, using the potty, and being nice to others (including me). But sometimes, she’s a drama queen. Sometimes, she can be manipulating. I know- that sounds crazy to have a manipulating two year old, but it’s the truth. She knows how to get what she wants from me and from daddy. And that frustrates me. She’s so smart and great at communicating and behaves so well! So when she’s upset or hurt or frustrated and can’t tell me, she just starts doing weird stuff. I don’t know why, so I tell her to stop. She cries. I get frustrated. She cries more, then I cry. Sometimes it’s a nasty situation in a short number of minutes.

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I was talking through this with Hubby’s mom, and she totally commiserated. She also gave me some advice. My frustration has a root somewhere deeper. It could be jealousy (“I want my Daddy!” when she’s with me and not him) or perfectionism (she isn’t perfect, however totally awesome she might be most of the time). It could be that I’m too quick-tempered (I know already that I am). It could be a plethora of extenuating circumstances that have stressed me out and out me on edge before EK has even entered the picture.

There is an element of a generational curse that I am trying not to inherit. I have a quick temper, like my parents before me. I know for a fact that I cannot overcome it myself – I need God’s help to get past it and relax and move on. Hubby’s mom gave me four R’s to help remember a good process to squelch that temper as it comes on…

Recognize it as sin.

Repent and ask for forgiveness.

Receive the forgiveness. Not just ask for it. Fully receive it.

Take responsibility for it, and be able to call it down.

Then, the next time the quick temper bubbles up in me, I can go through the steps more quickly. I can recognize it before it actually happens, repent, receive forgiveness, and take the responsibility for it. Then it’s easier to move on, without the temper (and the words/actions that would follow). Praise Jesus for the opportunity to lay our sins at his feet, and have them washed away!

Do you have a vice that just keeps pecking away at you, no matter how much you try to control it? What do you do to get past it?

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

8 Things I Want My Non-Parent Friends to Know

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This post also appeared on MyBigJesus.com along with tons of other awesome posts – check them out!

I have lots of non-parent friends. They’re great! I love spending time with them, although sometimes it seems that I don’t get to as often as I’d like. So, non-parents, here’s to you!

1. I still want to hang out. Yes, it might mean you come to me more often than I come to you. Yes, it might mean that I come with one or two little stowaways. Yes, it might take a little more planning. Yes, it might even mean that it’s cut short or cried out by a kid (with me or with someone else). But I still value our relationship. It looks different, but I don’t want it to end.

2. I can still be spontaneous. There’s the odd night that my kids are in bed early, and I am not tired. Yeah, I said it. Sometimes, I want to leave the house at 8:00pm and watch tv with you or catch a late dinner. Give me a break and meet me for a drink, already!

3. I didn’t stop being cool. I still like listening to good music, seeing good movies and eating good food. Why do you assume I only eat chicken nuggets while listening to Raffi?

4. I’m still a woman. Yes, “mommy” is one of my number one defining attributes. However, I’m a wife. I’m a friend. I’m a daughter. I’m a sister. Most of all, (GASP!) I’m a woman. I love wearing mascara, shopping for shoes, sipping lattes and (insert any other cliche about females here).

5. I don’t think less of you because you aren’t in my shoes. Just because you decided not to have kids, or haven’t found your soul mate doesn’t mean I think any less of you. I have friends in every stage of life; I haven’t limited my hangout group to “parents of young kids”.

6. I like to stay up late! I’m still a night owl; I can function on less sleep sometimes. I’m productive and happy at night after my kids go to bed, so call me up or come over for a chat! Don’t assume I crash at 7:30pm when my kids do, because that’s only sometimes true.

7. I love my kids, but I don’t mind leaving them sometimes. In fact, I think it’s healthy for me to have conversations with other adults, have a meal I don’t have to share, and to peepee in the potty without an audience.

8. I would love it if you hung out with my kids. They’re hilarious. I’m proud of them. I want to show them off in their best light, and I also want you to see their off days, so you have a real picture of who I am through these little lives I have created, shaped, loved and let go. Yeah, it might not be for you right now. It might not be for you ever. But being a parent is fun, crazy, hard and rewarding. It’s who I am. It’s the greatest gift God has ever given me, and I do my best to relish it and share it. Get to know my kids, and you get to know me.

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

The Great Pumpkin Patch Meltdown

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I had a grand idea. It was to get Hubby and our kids, Hubby’s brothers, their wives and their kids all together for a photo shoot. It’s fall, so we figured a local pumpkin patch was the best place to do it. We planned our outfits, picked a time that worked around everyone’s naps, and planned our weekend around it. J can sometimes have a super long morning nap, so I ended up having to wake him up to get him ready to go. I was a little worried whether or not he’d let go of me and hang out with the other kids so we could get some good pictures.

Little did I know, he wasn’t the one I needed to worry about.

EK had had a totally normal morning, and right when we got to the pumpkin patch, she was really sweet on all the littler babies. But then, we decided we wanted to put the babies in a wagon (this place had those red Radio Flyers you could put the pumpkins in to take them to the car) and have EK pull it. But it was tougher than it looked (when it was full of pumpkins and babies), so I tried to help her a little.

Note: She didn’t want the help. Cue the biggest “terrible two” meltdown I’ve ever seen.

This was a lay-on-the-ground, scream-at-the-top-of-her-lungs sort of tantrum. My even-tempered child turned into an angry monster over whom I had no control. No one could do anything, so we all stood around, a little nervously, and try to pretend no one noticed the tantruming toddler.

Hubby’s mom finally picked her up and took her to get a snow cone from the stand nearby (because it’s okay when grandmas do that) so that we could try to continue taking photos. But as soon as snow cone time was over, it was meltdown #2. Or maybe the meltdown had only paused. Either way, the cute photos of my daughter were pretty much over.

What does a mama do in that situation? Wait it out. In a public place, surrounded by family and strangers alike, I just had to let it run its course. Thankfully, everyone was gracious and turned a blind eye to the ground-shaking sounds erupting from the small body. It was her first real tantrum, and we haven’t had another one since.  Here’s to praying that it was a one-time fluke… right?

The mischievous face of my darling two-year-old, pre-meltdown. I think she was plotting all along.
The mischievous face of my darling daughter, pre-meltdown. I think she was plotting all along.
mommyhood

Potty Training Update

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Here’s a TMI post for you if I’ve ever written one…

Our potty training has been extremely lax. Our philosophy has been that when EK is ready, she will start making moves. So we bought a little potty, put her on it a couple of times each day, asked her several more times a day if she’d like to use it (usually receiving a “no” for a while), and otherwise let her tell us how interested she was – or wasn’t. She’s just now two and a half, so I haven’t been terribly worried about it, especially because in the past month or so she’s been doing a GREAT job.

((Side story: Hubby and I traveled with the kids to GA for my high school reunion. On the way back to NC, we were, uh, really tired, from the party the night before, so we just put the kids in the car in their pajamas, and hit the road. We stopped at a Subway for lunch and hydration and rest, and EK decided that she HAD to use the potty. At Subway. Gross. And guess what she was wearing? One piece zip-up pajamas. So I’m in the Subway bathroom, exhausted but giving my A+ parenting game, stripping my daughter to her skin to hold her over the toilet seat, that I’ve completely covered with toilet paper but I’m still not letting her touch. After she has successfully done her business, I’m trying to get her back in her (dry!) diaper and zip-up pajamas with no changing table… aka standing up… without letting anything touch the floor. Blerg. That was a long ten minutes. Now back to regularly scheduled posting.))

She’s started mentioning using the potty more, so we’ve started asking her a lot more often, and it’s been working! We keep a dry diaper a lot of the day, and use the potty several times, so we’re feeling great. On Thursday, she even (wait for it…) POOPED in the potty! And even my limited potty training experience tells me that’s a milestone!

Funny little thing about the past two weeks… EK has decided she no longer wants to use the little training potty. She only wants to sit on an actual toilet. Okay, great. Except she can’t really keep herself from falling in all that well. It takes a little more help from whoever is with her. But it’s pretty cute to see how proud of herself she is when she’s tinkling in “Mommy’s potty”. We’ve been rewarding her with a couple of jelly beans each time, so she’s extra excited to get those!

So now we’re to the point that we need to really buckle down and get her from using the potty most of the time to all the time. We just bought some Pull-Ups, so that should help. What are you suggestions for completing the process? And then, how do we wean her off the jellybeans?!

food, health and fitness, home, mommyhood

We’re eating all the fruit.

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One of the changes we’ve made at our house to be a little more healthy is to have healthier snack options. Yes, I love Cheetos. However, I know that there are approximately 2,463,910 healthier snacks. We’ve been keeping Pretzel Crisps (we like the “Everything” flavor) and Nut Thins to eat with cheese, and tons of fruit as our preferred snacks. (Unless I’ve recently made those spiced pumpkin muffins from Against All Grain. Then all bets are off.)

My kids love the fruit. And I don’t mean a little bit. They are fruit nuts (see what I did there?) and so a trip to the grocery store is colorful and fresh and often. We buy berries of all kinds (twice as much if they’re on sale), grapes, bananas, apples, plums, and anything else the looks good or is cheap.

Today the grocery trip wore them out, so I had a double nap (WIN!) to do a little more to the fruit than usual. Often, I only have time to throw it in the fridge, and then I’m distracted doing something else. But since I had time today, I decided to take the fruit snacking thing to the next level.

I took the blueberries, strawberries and grapes we bought and gave them a vinegar rinse. I got this ideal from my mom… apparently a vinegar rinse kills bacteria that causes fruit to mold after a few days. Her “recipe” is 1/4 cup white vinegar for every gallon of water. My “recipe” is put the fruit in a bowl of water, dribble some white vinegar in there, and let it sit for about 5 minutes. Seems to work just as well.

The next thing I did was to semi-prepare the fruit so that when my kids want some, I can just toss it in a bowl for them and it’s ready. I cut the tops off all the strawberries, pulled the grapes off the stems, and even quartered a small bowl of them (J can’t eat them whole yet). Blueberries are, well, ready. Obviously.

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All of this took me about half an hour, but I was also doing some dishes and talking on the phone, so I didn’t feel like it was wasted. And now J is eating his bowl of quartered grapes and I’m blogging about it, instead of quartering them now!

What are some healthy snacks you like munching on? Do your kids love fruit as much as mine do?

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Just because I have to include a picture of my cute kiddo 🙂
faith, mommyhood, random thoughts

Currently

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I’m joining Hannah at Joyful Life (her first time hosting!) for the Currently link-up series. I love connecting with y’all, visiting new blogs, hearing from you, and growing community. Join us!

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Thinking about my decision to stay home with my kids this school year. It’s hard – not that I’m surprised – and it’s rewarding. I love it and struggle with it all at the same time. I know that I won’t regret this decision to spend the extra time with them, but it’s also been difficult to find any sort of routine to balance quality time with them, time with Hubby, and time to keep the house, cook, grocery shop, etc. If you’ve got it figured out, send some suggestions my way!

Listening to the sounds of J lolling his tongue around in his mouth. He’s got a lot of “la la la la la” going on!

Doing is a little difficult to tell y’all about without taking all day, but Hubby and I are doing some purging/cleaning/reorganizing/etc in the midst of our deciding whether to stay in our home, renovate/add on, or move. We are praying for major wisdom in this area; we want to make the right decision for our family and for hopefully 10 or 15 years. This is a life move, y’all.

Thankful for the crisp fall weather and the sunshine that’s been accompanying it (for now). The kids and I have been spending a lot of time outside, enjoying the weather. We are also thankful for our deck – it’s a great space to enjoy the sunshine and the breeze!

What are you currently up to?

 

mommyhood, siblings

I hope they are friends.

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There are so many directions I could go when I talk about siblings, but I’ll start here: I’m already worried my kids won’t get along.

Actually, let’s not say worried so much as it’s already on my mind. What’s the key to your kids getting along? I know from experience it doesn’t just happen. Here’s the short version of my relationship with my brother: We’re almost 7 years apart, so I remember being an only child. He was cute as a baby, but started bugging me about the time he learned to walk (he followed me around because I was his favorite), and then didn’t stop it for… a long time. We were never in the same stage of life until he was in high school or so. Now that we are both adults, we get along much better, but still argue over stupid stuff sometimes – you know, like who knows more Harry Potter trivia and why it think it’s ridiculous that he would want a CAT of all things. I talk to him on the phone every few days, see him every couple of months, and truly enjoy his company. But did our parents somehow pull us out of the stage in which we just annoyed each other and magically thrust us into mutual appreciation of the other?

Braces and bowl cuts.
Braces and bowl cuts.

On the other hand, Hubby and his brothers have always been close. He says they fought about stuff, but it was only for a few minutes and they would be back to playing and snuggling again (thoughts on those Hsu boys acting like puppies here).

As for my kids, it seems that right now is the stage of J annoying EK ALL OF THE TIME. All he wants to do is be near her, play alongside her, or just watch her. Too bad all of those things make her unnecessarily frustrated. She gets to the point that if he crawls in her direction, she just screams. What is that about?! It just hurts my ears and makes J laugh all the more.

All I did was ask her to sit next to him for a picture.
All I did was ask her to sit next to him for a picture.

I hope that soon, J will catch up a little and be able to play with EK rather than just grab what she’s holding. I hope she will learn to think he’s cute and fun instead of just being jealous and annoyed when he’s in the same room. I hope the moments of giggles about weird sounds they make and laughing about messes during dinner never stop. I hope they are close when they get in school, and share friends, and help each other out. I hope they have that undeniable bond of love and support, even when they disagree with each other. I hope they can encourage each other to be better people. I hope they are friends.

home, mommyhood, random thoughts

What I Was Doing Last Year

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Last year in late September, I was expecting a baby boy to come in a couple of months. I was working, exhausted all the while, on a Christmas program, because everyone knows you need months for that. I was learning to lead worship on my own. I was beginning to feel the terrible twos coming on for my daughter (yes, several months early) while I tried to get the quality time in before her sibling arrived. I was rearranging my home, in anticipation. I was planning visits and trips before it would be harder to travel.

But this year? I’ve got two amazing, busy kids. I’ve got a husband who I appreciate and love more every single day. I’ve lost two family grandparents, but gained a niece and a nephew. I’m looking forward to my 10-year high school reunion this weekend, and reconnecting with old friends. I’m gaining more confidence in my new roles, and not mourning the old ones that I’ve moved on from. I’d say I’m doing well.

Another thing I’m doing is looking ahead (possibly way ahead) to needing more space for a bigger family (read: we are not currently pregnant). We’d like to have another child. But even if we don’t, I hear that the bigger kids are, the more space they need. And right now, every closet is full, every corner has something in it, and my kids have full roam of our home. We love our house. We’ve been here for four wonderful years. We’ve rearranged a hundred times, redecorated rooms, moved kids around, added and taken away furniture and in general changed up the feng shui.

One of my absolute favorite spots in our home. I'm sitting at the kitchen counter.
One of my absolute favorite spots in our home. I’m sitting at the kitchen counter.

But it’s time for something more. An addition, perhaps, of another bed and bath. Or a move, to a different home. We haven’t decided. We are early in the process. But our hearts are excited and mourning at the same time. Hubby and I have conversation after conversation, discussing what the best options are. We’ve met with our real estate agent who sold us our current home, seen a few houses, and even found one we think we could love. We’ve also met with a friend who does additions and renovations, discussing options if we decided to stay. It’s an overwhelming idea, whichever one we choose.

So that’s what’s happening with me right now that’s different from last year. I’d say it’s a good place to be one year later. You know, other than working my job, raising my kids, adoring my Hubby, the usual.

What were you doing a year ago?

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

She Loves You (Yeah Yeah Yeah!)

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With kids, everything happens in stages. Stages of waking up every few hours, and stages of sleeping through the night. Stages of independence, and stages of debilitating neediness. Stages of picky eating, and stages of so hungry they’ll eat sidewalk chalk after a three course meal. These stages – seasons, I like to call them – go by alarmingly fast sometimes.

Recently EK has entered into a season of snuggling, hugging and kissing. Voluntarily showing love, basically. It’s particularly merciful because this season is on the heels of a difficult season of not wanting to sit still enough to snuggle, yet screaming and crying if we left her for even a moment. But she has (for the time being) moved on to confidently knowing we’ll come back, and giving us smooches for the road.

For instance, the other evening I was leaving to go to a birthday party, and left the kids with a friend. When I announced that I was leaving, told her I loved her, and turned toward the door, she ran over to me saying, “Hug! Hug!” So of course I picked her up, and she said, “Bye bye mama. I miss you.” Talk about melting a mama’s heart. I mean, seriously… when I pick her up to hug her these days, she snuggles my neck, pats my back and strokes my hair! It’s truly a Pat yourself on the back, you good parent, you! sort of thing. The gestures of love she’s received from Hubby and me are being given back to us. She has so internalized our love and the way we show it that she is giving that love back out.

What if we, as children of God, took the gestures of love shown to us by the Father, and gave it back to Him? Or better yet, passed it on to others? The Heavenly Father gave up his only son for you. And me. And our families. And old folks in nursing homes. And inner city children. And celebrities. And sleazy politicians. And murderers and thieves. He loves us (all of us!) that much. As much as I love my children (a ludicrous amount), it’s only a fraction of the love God has for me. If we take even a portion of the love and blessing we’ve received from the Father, and multiply it by passing it on? That’s Kingdom business.