Tag Archives: motherhood

Everyday Exiles, faith, mommyhood

My little people aren’t to blame. 

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This post originally appeared on Everyday Exiles.

I’ve written again and again about losing my patience. Again and again, people comment… “Me too,” they say. “I know what you mean.” and “It gets easier.” are other common responses. I get texts, private messages, and comments right on my blog or my Facebook page telling me what I already know is true: “Every parent loses their patience sometimes. Kids can be totally frustrating. You aren’t to blame.”

Well, my little people aren’t to blame, either.

What is our culture’s obsession with blame? We need someone to be in the wrong in every unfavorable situation. Our president or the government is to blame. My boss is to blame. Our spouses, our parents, our kids. Well, what about the recent hurricanes? Who is to blame for that? No one. We’d love to pin down who caused all the destruction, who could be held responsible for the damage done, the property lost, or the money that will be spent on rebuilding instead of vacations and Christmas presents.

So when I get upset, annoyed, frustrated, or just plain angry, my little people aren’t to blame. I might need reminding of this fact, but they simply aren’t to blame for their tendencies toward mess-making, misunderstandings, or sleep-deprived moodiness. My little ones aren’t to blame for the fact that scrambled eggs aren’t their favorite breakfast, or that they have to wear pants today, or even the fact that they can’t survive off of fruit snacks.

But you know what, I do agree that I’m not to blame either.

You see, the kids and I, we are human. We are broken. We are prone to mistakes and sins. The only thing that can redeem us of those things is the grace of God. It’s by the grace of God we love each other through and in spite of messes (literal and figurative) and it is by His grace we can sometimes rise above the little things that often get under our skin. It’s by the grace of God that I even have these perfect little people in my life, and I wouldn’t dare say that my frustration outweighs the daily joy they bring to my life.

mommyhood

13 Things My Kids Do When They Should Be Sleeping

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This article originally appeared on Perfection Pending.

My kids love their sleep – usually. Sometimes, they come up with a myriad of excuses why they aren’t tired, they don’t need to go to bed, and they can just hang out with me instead. When I ask them to please rest anyway, they find a wealth of other activities that are more fun. Or at least less sleep-inducing. Here’s a list of the inexhaustible opportunities my kids take advantage of when I think they’re sleeping…

1. Pooping. This is the most-used excuse for not napping I’ve ever heard of, in my house or other parents’. “Go to sleep!” “Nope, gotta poop.” I’d say that there’s a safe three times a week or more that I think all is quiet, and then I find someone on the toilet.
2. Playing dress up. Costumes are more imaginative than pajamas. Especially when your pajamas are Batman themed, and you have a mask and a cape that you just have to put with them!
3. Doing puzzles. Apparently it calms their minds. Or puts off the nap. Or something.
4. Meeting up with siblings. In the bathroom. Like 12-year-old girls skipping math class, they have somehow planned to meet up in 20 minutes without a clock to tell them it’s time.
5. Reading. I’m not usually upset at this one, but still. Reading isn’t sleeping. Put down Brown Bear, Brown Bear and get to sleep.
6. Blowing their noses. Or using annoying amounts of tissues for whatever other purpose they see fit (read: a pile on the floor). They must go through a box a week! 
7. Shining flashlights. Or any other toy that has flashing lights. Or a random fiber optic wand that was a wedding favor.
8. Staging a coup. My son has a knack for pretending his “snuggle buddies” are saving the world. He has to act out a play where he is the superhero, and his “buddies” are either sidekicks, villains, or doggies in distress. 
9. Singing. Loudly. Confidently.And I don’t mean lullabies. They’re typically blasting out the latest Disney ballad at the top of their lungs, complete with dance moves. I have dreams of Broadway.
10. Thinking deeply. I can always count on a profound statement or existential concern when I ask the kids what they’re thinking about when they aren’t sleeping. “Did you know that babies don’t have teeth when they’re born, Mama?”
11. Changing clothes. Their pajama pants were itchy or the tag in their shirt was scratchy. Or else they needed fresh underpants, and won’t tell me why.
12. Eating. They’ve either hoarded some fruit snacks, or pilfered some candy from the last holiday. I’ve found Starburst wrappers under their beds and pretzel crumbs crushed in their sheets. 
13. Making messes. To be fair, the kids make messes all day, every day. But it’s that particular time frame where they’re in their rooms and I’m nowhere in sight that they perform the epic toy box explosions.

So if your kids are doing any (or all) these things instead of getting their recommended 14 hours during a 24-hour period, know you’re not alone. You’re in a good, sleepless company.

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday, y’all! I hope you’re enjoying your fall and your Halloween candy! I have only stolen the Reese’s Pieces and Snickers. See, I’m a good mom! Anyway, here are the funnies from our week. Enjoy!


D: *hums Twinkle Twinkle* I singing a song!

D walking in the yard: Mom! Iss cwunchy leabs! (Crunchy leaves)

EK early in the day: Are witches real?
Me: Nope. No witches.
EK later in the day: Mom, are fairies the only ones who can make magic?
Me, apparently crushing dreams: Well, fairies aren’t really real. And magic is more the feeling we have when something is beautiful or unbelievable, or seems unrealistic.
EK: Well, how does the tooth fairy get to you?
Me:
Hubby:
Me:
Hubby:
Me: Magic!
Hubby: *dies laughing*
EK: *dies laughing*
Me: I thought you meant witches’ magic! (Trying not to dig the hole deeper…)

EK, during breakfast: When people are talking, it’s destroying me so I can’t eat.
Me: I think you mean distracting.

EK: I would love it if a rainy Saturday happened. I would sleep all day.
Me: *plots how to make it rain on Saturday*

EK: I was thinking on, um,
J: Wednesday?
EK: On, um,
J: Christmas?
EK: On, um, Turkey Day. Could we have a big feast?

J: I wish I had a TV on my ceiling on my room so I could watch Neckflix.
Me: *not going to correct him*

In the car…
D, chanting: Abocado book. Abocado book. Abocado book. (It was a dinosaur book.)

J, speaking of words that start with “h”: How about hole? Like there was a little hole and a snail fell in there?

J, talking to a store clerk: Well, I belong to someone else.
Me: Who do you belong to?
J: *points to me*

Hope you found a giggle or two reading these! What silly things are your kids saying these days?

mommyhood

They’re getting so big…

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Sometimes, just the briefest outpouring of words is worth sharing.

I glimpsed my middle child on the monitor last before I went to bed. He wasn’t making any noise, but I always turn the screen on to take a peek before I fall asleep. I was taken aback by how big he looked, how much of the bed was covered by the body I can still pick up and snuggle so tightly. He still fits in the crook of my arms when he’s still enough to cradle. But he’s getting so big…

My youngest asked me relentlessly to hold him yesterday. I was constantly picking him up, switching him from hip to hip, trying to convince him he was too big to hold for that long. Deep down, I actually loved that he needed me a little more than usual. I know it won’t be long before he’s too busy for me, and too independent to need me. He’s getting so big…

My oldest is smart, brave, and takes care of herself. She can get herself a snack, tie her shoes, and entertain herself for hours if I let her. But last night, she asked me for another song, another snuggle, a longer prayer. I could tell we hadn’t seen each other enough during the day, and she craved a little more attention. I knew she’d be fine if I left her, but I stayed. She’s just getting so big…

food, home, mommyhood

Healthy After-School Snacks

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If your kids are like mine, they come home from school HUNGRY. I’ve been working a lot on packing healthy lunches for them, and consequently on providing healthy snacks for when they get home. If you’re out of ideas, here are a few oldies (but goodies!) and a few new ideas for you to try with your kids.

1. Variations on “ants on a log”. I bet we can all remember having a celery stalk with peanut butter and raisins, but you can also halve a thick carrot and add the toppings the same way! Try a different kind of nut butter (or sun butter) for a new flavor, add honey if your sweetie likes sweets, and if your kids don’t like raisins, try Craisins for a similar effect with a tart pop!

2. Peanut butter on anything. Speaking of that wonderful creation: peanut butter. It goes with anything. Apples, bananas, carrots, celery, on lots of different kinds of bread (try tortillas, pita, or naan), rice cakes, or just on a spoon. My friend’s mom used to make “fruit pizza”, which was pizza crust or pita, with a layer of peanut butter and honey (or caramel for a treat), with bites of fruit, nuts, and granola sprinkled on top. It was a major win, especially if you need a snack that’s multiple servings.

3. Tortilla sushi. You can take a tortilla and put a thin layer of mayo or mustard, deli meat, lettuce, and cheese, roll it tightly, and slice it into “sushi bites”. It transforms a “boring” wrap into a fun snack! As you can imagine, peanut butter and jelly (I buy Polaner’s Fruit Spread that’s sweetened with only fruit juice) works just as well! Or, if your kids are like mine, picking up a California roll for some REAL sushi is a hit, too!

4. Chips and salsa or guac. With this one, the fresher the better. Grab some avocados from Costco or Trader Joe’s, add tomatoes, some onion, lime juice, salt and pepper, and you’ve got yourself a pleasing and healthy guacamole for an easy snack. Lots of grocery stores have Wholly Guacamole if you aren’t a cook, or some fresh-made salsa in their deli section. We like black bean and corn salsa for its protein, too, easily whipped up with tomato, onion, lime juice, red wine vinegar, salt and pepper. Try a new salsa on your kids!

5. Protein bites. These no-bake treats are so easy! I came across my favorite recipe on Pinterest, but a quick search for “protein balls” or “energy bites” will reveal hundreds of ideas in a second. My usual ingredients include dry oats, peanut butter, chocolate chips, ground flaxseed, honey, Craisins, and vanilla. There are so many flavors out there to try, and they’re all pretty easy!

6. Healthy muffins. I have discovered a food blog that’s quite literally changed my life. BrenDid.com has tons of different healthy muffin recipes and I haven’t made one yet that my kids haven’t devoured. Almost all her muffin recipes are sugar free, oil free, and gluten free! Everything from pumpkin muffins to chocolate peanut butter muffins, even the plain oatmeal muffins (with any type of add-in you can think of) are a hit with my kids. We eat them for breakfast, or I send them in their lunches, or we snack on them. They’re whipped up in the blender and totally yummy!

7. Hummus. Easy to eat on veggies, chips, or pita, hummus is a versatile and delicious snack. If you’ve never tried your hand at making hummus, there are very few ingredients and all you do is toss them in your blender! I recommend trying a new hummus recipe (just get on Pinterest, y’all!) and even let your kids help you make it! (If your family usually likes Greek or Mediterranean food, try making some tzatziki, too!)

8. Apple cheddar toast. This may sound crazy, but one of the most delightful snacks is cheddar cheese melted on toast, with a (still cold) Granny Smith apple sliced on top. Savory and sweet, hot and cold, crunchy and melted cheese? Those are three winning combinations, not to mention healthy!

I hope I gave you a few new ideas for healthy snacks (or even lunches) to please the hungry brood at your house. What other suggestions do you have for healthy snacks?

mommyhood, parenting fails, women

Parent Fail #437: So I took my kids to Chick-fil-A…

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So I took my kids to Chick-fil-A for dinner tonight. Hubby had rehearsal, and I thought since they hadn’t had it in a few days, it was a good dinner option for just the four of us. I was actually pretty pleased with how the whole experience was going; they ate well, played nicely, and had even exchanged their toys for ice cream without any meltdowns. Finally, I gave them the five minute warning before we left to come home.

Then the two minute.

Then the “One more slide down, and then get your shoes on!”

J came out first… my sweet little three and a half year old. He was still squealing, but carried his socks and shoes to our table. EK, my five year old, typical oldest child, came next, her shoes already on. It became clear I was going to have to drag D, my only semi-coherently communicating two year old, out of the play area by force.

As I was wrangling D out from the top of where I could possibly reach inside that sticky, primary-colored plastic, I saw EK next to the door to leave the restaurant, her head turned, looking for me. Assuming she was just being impatient, I almost ignored her, until I didn’t see J.

I bolted out the door of the play area, knowing D probably wasn’t going anywhere anyway. EK shouted at me that J had run outside, just as I saw his shoes and socks at our table. My heart began to pound in my chest, afraid that the Chick-fil-A local high school fundraiser dinner rush was the optimal time for my kid to get snatched, or run over. You know, worst case scenario stuff. (Spoiler: he is fine.)

As I told EK to get back to D in the play area and wait there, I ran smack into my savior – a woman holding my giggling son by the arm, saying, “I’m just worried about this child!” I snatched (see the irony?) said giggling child, and began reprimanding and crying simultaneously. Then, I managed to look at my savior, the woman who had prevented my child from being run over or snatched by a stranger… Full into the face of a woman I knew. A sweet family friend, a mom of several littles herself, who just happened to be walking into Chick-fil-A empty-handed, leaving a free hand to grab my wayward child. Bless her heart, she didn’t know when she chose her dinner location how she would cause tears of relief to run down my face. (And also a long talk about safe choices, followed by a consequence of skipping his nightly TV time.) This parent fail is just one more example of how it takes a tribe, y’all. Do the good works for your fellow mamas.

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday! AND HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Our kids are excited to trick-or-treat for the first time tonight! Last year, you might remember… we were all sick, and so we missed out. They can’t wait to get a bunch of candy! And I can’t wait to take a candy tax. Bottle caps are MINE. Here are the funnies for the week!

EK: We haven’t watched Mary Poppins in a while!
J: What’s that one?
EK: It’s like, “A spoon of medicine, a spoon of medicine,” like that. “Helps the honey go down…”
Me: Nailed it.

EK: I think kindergarten schools give fall breaks because they know all the kids in the building can’t see their parents as often.

EK: Did you know that when it’s dark, your eye pukes are big, and when it’s bright your eye yokes are super small?
Hubby: I think the word you’re looking for is pupil. Can you say pupil?
EK: So yeah, at night your pukers are big. And small in the morning!

D: Joooooooe! He got a lollyhop!

J: Daddy and Gon Gon’s sandals looks the same!
EK: Yeah! They look similar!
J: They don’t look similar!
EK:  Yeah, but Chinese and Japanese look similar.

J: Knock knock!
Me: Who’s there?
J: Interrupting cow.
Me: Interrupting co…..
D: Moooooooooo!
Me: Whelp he stole your joke.

EK: Two and two is five.
Me: It’s actually four. (I hold up my fingers and show her)
EK: Well, one and one is three!
Me: I don’t think I’m going to be able to do this while I make breakfast.

Most annoying thing of the week: EK and D dressed as pirates for the fall festival at our church last Friday. I had a pirate costume for J also, but he pitched a fit to dress as the dog he’s been a couple of years in a row (that’s getting too small). Instead of fight, I let him wear it. Now that it’s Halloween today, he’s all excited to be the pirate… but the other two are on to their other costumes. Oh well. 

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday, everyone! Does it feel like fall where you are? NC had some serious rain yesterday, but the rest of this week will make up for it! Here are the funnies for the week!


EK, putting a play blood pressure cuff on my arm: Oh no! You’re 29/61 miles strong!

J, right after he woke up: I can’t walk. I can’t breathe. I can’t even walk!
Spoiler: He was both walking and breathing at the time.

D: I want a I love!
Me: What?
D: I want a I love!
Me: Oh. An olive.

Friend: Do you know when your birthday is?
J: Some days it’s after Christmas.

EK was trying to spell out aloud a letter she wrote me (with help) by saying the letters from each word all in a row, with no pauses. She got through a sentence or so (that I managed to follow, surprisingly) and then J shut her down: Okay, that’s all the letters you have to say.

J: You guys are special to me. And we’re special to God.
Everyone: Aww!

EK sneezed and had some snot come out. J responded with: Well, that was a disaster.

Me: Can you blow them a kiss?
D, blowing a kiss with the hand no holding his cup: Mmmmmah! (Pause) Wait! Other hand! Mmmmmah!

EK on the policy about library books at school: Two, if you buy three, you can’t bring the fifth one home.

What are your kids saying these days?

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday!! I’ve been bouncing back and forth from the mountains to furniture market, so here are the snippets of humor I caught in between!! Enjoy!


J sharing knowledge: Have you ever seen a hamomy fish? It’s the most juiciest, colorfulest, and wettest fish of all time! And it can also change it size! And make apple trees!
Me: *not sure how to respond*

J when he’s mad at me: Well, maybe I don’t even want to snuggle you.

EK to me: You’re funny sometimes. Not a lot, but sometimes.

EK, upon seeing a cement truck printed with Stars and Stripes: its American day?! I didn’t know!

EK: It’s not good if you get colonies in your teeth.
Me: I think you mean cavities.

J’s newest thing is telling stories of when he was a baby. Such as: Did you know that when I was a baby, a tiny bear and a crawled up the back of my head?!?!

Me: Did you have fun with Necie and G-Daddy while I was gone?
EK: Yeah I did, but not too much, because I missed you.
Me: *heart eyes*

EK copying words from a book: I’m practicing my writing.
Me: That’s great! I can tell. Your letters are getting more clear!
EK: Yeah, and I’m building up my stamila.
Me: Your stamina?! Who taught you that word?!
EK: My teacher. (As in “Duh.”)

J, when asked to place napkins on the table:  I do that job at school for lots of different persons!

EK: Sometimes when you wake up, do your lips feel crunchy?

Hubby: Tell mom about your field trip!
EK: So, like… (I can’t hear anything else because I’m wondering how she learned “so like”.)

Well, that’s it for this week! What sillies have you heard from your kids recently?!

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday! Here are the funnies for your perusal and enjoyment!

D’s new thing is holding something on his head and declaring it a hat.
D: I got a grape hat!
J: Praise the Lord! I have a hand hat!

EK: Well the dinosaurs are instinct. (Pronounced with the emphasis on “stinct” like you would when saying “extinct”.)
J: What?!
EK: Yeah, they’re dead. Which is called instinct.
Me: I think you mean EXtinct.

D, covered in noodles: I got da noodle blacelet!

J about his lunch: Not too bad, and not too good.

D was sick for a couple days last week. He also did this, and ruined this batch of muffins…

EK: It’s Friyay!
Me: Did you just say Friyay?
EK: Yeah! And when you say Friyay you gotta raise the roof!

D, holding up a few fingers: How many dis rainbow?

Nate: Have you lost any teeth?
EK: Yeah, two.
Nate: How was it?
EK: Pretty fun. (She basically said “whatever”)

When asked what he wanted to be for Halloween…
J: A pumpkin! A stack of pumpkins!

What are your kids asking to be for Halloween?