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mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday, everyone! EK and I are in Georgia with my family, but there are still some funnies here! Enjoy your Tuesday!

EK: How did she get you in her belly?
Me: What?
EK: Necie. How did she get you in her belly so you could be born?
Me: *oh no, oh no* Well… she got pregnant.
EK: Pregnant? Well how did you get out? Did they tear her belly and let you out?
Me: Uh, well, she went to the hospital to get me out.
EK: *tries to keep going*
Me: SO WHAT did you learn at school today, sweetie?!

J at bedtime: Will you sing about pineapple tree?
Me: I don’t think I know that one.
J: It goes like this: Pineapple tree, pineapple tree, pineapple tree, tomorroooooow! (In a very melodic voice I might add.) Now you do it!
Me: Well, I think it sounds great when you do it.
J: *repeats song*

EK and J have been making “birthday cakes” out of these manipulatives. EK made one on my bedroom floor, and J came in and saw it…J: Oh, Daddy! What a lovely cake!

J in the car one day, giggling his butt off: The ocean is made out of cookie butts!

Talking about our trip to my parents’ house before we left…
Hubby: What do you want to do there? Want to go shopping?
EK: Yeah! At the food store! In case they don’t have food and need it!

While EK and I were gone, J managed to cut his pinky finger on something. Hubby woke up to him very matter-of-factly telling him that he was bleeding. When I was FaceTiming him later that morning, he described what happened liked this: Well I was in D’s room. And I  smashed it! I smashed my promise finger on the black and grey fing. The rectangle. And then I was bleeding on the floor! And I just smashed my little piggy and I came upstairs. (Yes, “promise finger” and “little piggy” are words used to describe his pinky finger.)

mommyhood

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday, all! Besides the adorable yoga photo, there are some other funnies here to brighten your day. Enjoy!


Necie: You have on shoes but no pants?
J: Yeah. Like EK did it. I did what she did.
(She was wearing a dress.)

Me: Are you upset, bud?
J: I’m just mad at everybody.
EK: That means you’re mad at me!
J: Not a funny joke!

EK: I’m not tired!
Necie: Yes you are… I can see it.
EK: I was just frownding.


J: Can you get me more card moneys?


EK is working on her drawing skills.

EK: I want to listen to Moana.
Me: Well, I put on the Disney radio, so whatever comes up is what we’ll hear.
EK, making her justification: It’s cloudy enough. We can listen to Moana.

J finishes his breakfast in record time.
Me: Wow! Would you like some more eggs?
J: Not exactly… (walks away)
Me: Okay, then.

J: Ahhh! He’s gonna stole this from me! (Runs away from D)

J, grunting and trying to pick up D: Here, Mom! Here’s the biggest boy you never haved before!

After putting him down twice and thinking I’ve finally gotten him to stay…
Me: Good night, babe.
J: Good night. I guess I am a liddle sleepy. (Followed by a dramatic but genuine yawn)

D has some new words, too! Here they are: no, bye bye, G-dah (what he’s calling my dad), Neenee (what he calls my mom AND hubby’s mom), night night, water, shoes, pants, nose, go (because he loves going wherever J and EK go), down (doesn’t like the high chair if he’s eaten what he considers to be enough) and yeaahhhh! And did I mention “no”? He says that one most of all.

Who else’s kids love saying no to everything? Will it ever stop?!

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday, everyone! Hope you had a great start to your week. Here are a few funnies to keep the happy going!

In the middle of the night, J plods into my room…
J: Mama, can you make a yiddle room? (He means on my pillow)
Me: Okay.
One minute later…
J: I’m ready to go back downstairs.
Me: Okay, see you in the morning.
J: I want you to carry me.
Me: Okay… well, just let me wake up a little.

Hubby: Do you know why elephants have big ears?
EK: They just do. I don’t know what else to tell you.

Hubby: What letters are on here?
J: F-A-R-M wollipop (lollipop) W-zero-K.

EK grabs her stuffed elephant by the trunk: I’m just grabbing it the trumpet.

At lunch…
J: In the bathtub, I was pretending that I was a duck eating water!
Everyone: ??

EK, running upstairs: Mom! I found a green necklace downstairs, and I want to save it for Valentimes! I’m gonna put it in that special place with all of my treasures!
Hubby: Oh you mean the top drawer of your nightstand?
EK: *runs away*

Me, quoting the Gruffalo: A mouse took a stroll through the deep, dark wood…
EK, continuing: A mouse saw a fox, and the fox was a fox!

Talking about her brother, who had just woken up…
EK: Ugh, I really smelled his yawn.

While it was dark outside…
EK: It’s cool how the grocery store and TJ’s (TJ Maxx) can glow up.

Crawling slowly instead of coming when I called…
J: I just can’t get out of this mud…
Spoiler: There was no mud.

J, when he was really cold in the morning: My teeth are moving up and down!

J, petting my head: I love your precious hair!

When J is in trouble: I just want to love you!

Well there are your funnies.  I hope it brightened your day!

mommyhood, women

5 Things You DON’T Need on Your Baby Registry

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The industry devoted to “baby stuff” is making a killing off of new parents who don’t know what they will and won’t use when they have a baby. And like every parent, I went through trial and error to find the things that I love. I even used a few different things with each kid, because I found a new product I loved, or brainstormed an easier way to get a task done. But either way, there are a few things that you just will not need, no matter what. I’m not saying you wouldn’t use it if you got it, but if you’re in a spot where you’d like to save money, you can cross these things off your list.

Newborn shoes and coats. Your newborn will spend most of their time swaddled, in blankets, in fleecy suits that cover their feet, or sleep sacks. You don’t need baby Pumas or a baby North Face to keep them warm. And you can’t let them wear puffy coats in their car seat anyway.

A “Peepee Teepee”. If your little boy is going to pee during a diaper change, this thing isn’t going to save you. You have to have ninja reflexes to keep yourself from getting soaked if he pees without his diaper on. (As an unfortunate aside, girls can somehow soak you, too!)

Diaper Genie (or similar). Any trash can with a lid will do. Or you can do what we do: just take them outside to the bin. Yes, I’m sorry, but there will be diapers you’ll want to take straight outside.

Bottle warmer. It sounds nice in theory, but wouldn’t the warm water from your faucet warm a bottle just fine? Or put the bottle in a pot of water on the stove, and warm it that way. I’ve found that bottle warmers aren’t any faster. It’s basically just money a person could spend on diapers.

Changing Table. Just put that changing pad on top of the dresser, and boom! More storage, and less furniture you’ll just get rid of when they’re three. You might change half the diapers on the nearest surface, anyway.

This might seem cold, but it’s like I said: when you’re counting the dollars you’re spending, these are just a few unnecessary things. What are some things that you would add to this list? Did you get any shower gifts that you absolutely never used?

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday! I’ve got a lot of funnies from EK this week, mostly because J’s vocabulary has (sadly) deteriorated into frustrated grunts and lots of “FINE!” and “OKAY!” Hopefully he’ll be back next week. Enjoy!

After J got in trouble…
EK: J, you know what? Even when you make bad choices, Jesus still loves you.

J: Did you remember that I was locked out on the porch and there was a robot?!
EK: You’ve been saying that for forty-nine years!

EK: These jeans have a hole.
Me: It’s okay, some people love holes in their jeans.
EK: I don’t want to wear them with a hole!
Me: Please. We aren’t going anywhere, just wear them to make it easy on me.
EK: Fine….
Two days later…
Me: *puts holey jeans in the trash*
Ek: Wahhh! I’m really gonna miss those jeeeeeeans!

EK: Look, mom! My booboo is getting better! I’m magical again!

EK: I tried to not dream about Teka, but I dreamed about Teka, that he would get Moana and kill her! Haha!
Me: Umm…

EK: Look, Mom! It’s the one with Darth Vader!
(For those who don’t know, that’s evil Emporer Zurg from Toy Story.)

J’s three major food groups:Broccoli, pickled radishes, and bulldozers.

J: You remember babies don’t do what they’re doing?
Me: Sure, babe.
J: And babies need help burping.
Me: Yes!

Tootsie roll=tweetsie roll (can you tell my kids are obsessed with trains?)

EK, singing: Oh Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun, please slide down on me! Wait… is it slide or lie?
Me: Shine… It’s shine.

Arguing about how to pronounce “Motonui” (Moana’s island)…
EK: Listen to this! She says Motchnui!
Me: I think it’s Motonui.
EK: She knows how to say her own country’s name!
Me: I know, but I don’t think you’re hearing her correctly.
EK: I’m gonna listen to her again.

 

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Happy Tuesday! Sorry it’s so late – I’ve had a busy day, full of running, friends, games, and homemade pizza. But no excuses… Here are the funnies!


Passing the hospital at night…
EK: There’s Lala’s work! (our PA friend)
J: And Lala’s work glows in the dark!

J: Can I have dessert?
Me: I asked you to eat five more bites, but you’ve only eaten two.
EK, with no pause: Just eat three more bites, J.
Me to Hubby: Was that math or coincidence?
Hubby: Let’s call it math.

Every time J is in a public bathroom: Is this toilet gonna flush really loud?

Avocado=abocado, alocado

Whenever I have to scold EK, she say, “I miss-ed you while I was at school!” Like, she missed me so she’s gonna say rude stuff now.

D: *brings me pig* Woof woof!
Me: That pig says, “Oink!”
D: *brings me a bear* Meow! Meow!
Me: A kitty cat says, “Meow,” not a bear!
D: *huffs and puffs away*

EK: Can I have that back?
J: (screaming) YES, MY DARLING PRECIOUS!

J: I hurt my finger! When I crosed it in the door!

J: Is it two firty o’clock?

J catapults himself onto D, and D pulls his hair. J: Well, that’s how I get pulled by my hair.


EK (in the picture above): I’ll have a number 8.

EK, holding a pencil: How do you spell Drew?
I spell it, and then his wife and daughter’s names too.
EK: I spelled their whole family! Oh wait! What about Walker and Quinn?! (their dogs)


EK (referring to the picture above, top to bottom): It’s a flower, a star, another flower, and a hoolie-hoop!
(She’s been using her Spirograph!)

EK: *toots*
Necie: If that smells, I’m leaving.
EK: You could just go like this when you smell it! *covers her nose*

EK: Let’s play hind and seek!
Me: I think you mean hind end seek.
EK: What?
Me: Nevermind.

EK to our friend who was holding her newborn baby girl: That baby is so cute, I could die!

Well, there you have it! What have your kiddos been saying recently?

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday, everyone! I’m glad to bring you a long list of hilarities, courtesy of the children! I literally can’t make this stuff up, y’all. Enjoy!

First time with his legs falling asleep…
J: Help me! My legs aren’t working! They’re not working a lot!

EK to Hubby: Daddy, tonight, can you take me on a special date, just you and me?
Hubby: You know what? Sure. I’ll take you out for dessert.
EK: Can we go have gelato?!
Hubby: Sure!
J, running in from the other room: TONIGHT! Can Mommy take me to have ice cream?! And that big girl (aka adult) who gives us gelato can give it to us?!
Me: *dying*

EK had just been out for ice cream with her daddy.
J: You say, “How was your special date?”
EK: No, you say it to me.
J: Oh. How was your special date?
EK: Great!

How the kids know we aren’t fancy: They ask for a towel instead of a napkin. A paper towel, of course.

Hubby: How was your nap?
EK: I didn’t go to sleep.
Me: Really?
EK: I just read a book.
Me: For three hours? (She can’t really read yet.)
EK: Yeah, I had to stay in my room till nap time was over.
Me: Um…

J, the first thing he said when he woke up: I love you and you’re awesome, EK.

 

EK to our waitress after we’d ordered: And also, excuse me, did you know that I’m the big sister who is four and that’s my brother who is three and my brother who is one and may I have my water in an adult cup?
Waitress: *pause* Since you’re the big sister, you can have water in an adult cup if your parents are okay with it.
EK: Okay. And for the brothers, they need cups with lids.
Me: *dying*

Bedtime stall of the week…
J: Wait! I forgot my nightstand water!

A breakfast song by J: This is the way we eat eat eat, eat eat eat, eat eat eat. This is the way we eat eat eat, before we go to play.

Misnomers of the week:
Stomach=stomachache, i.e.: My stomachache is getting hungry!
Potato=batato, i.e.: the food, Mr. Batato Head, etc.

What are your kiddos talking about this week?

faith, mommyhood, pregnancy, siblings, women

A Letter to My Third Child 

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This is a post I wrote a few weeks before D was born. It was up on Mom Babble for a while, and I only just remembered I hadn’t ever published it here. It’s such a sweet memory for me, especially now that he’s 16 months old, running around, beginning to talk, and generally being more self-sufficient than my other two were at this point in their lives. It’s sweet to think of the anticipation I was feeling when he wasn’t quite here yet. I hope you enjoy it.

My sweet little D,

I’m getting really excited for you to get here. There are just nine weeks left until you’re due to arrive, and I already wish I could just see you next week. Mostly, I’m excited to meet you, see what you look like, and introduce you to your crazy siblings. Also I’m getting uncomfortable, peeing all the time, and sleeping less than ever. But mostly I want to meet you.

I know you’ve been in my womb, hearing the squeals and shouts and cries and songs of your family. We may be a loud bunch, but we’re a good one, too. We love big, and we show it often. When you get out here, you’re going to feel the love from all the kisses and hugs you get from all of us. You might also get a love tap or seven from J, but it’s just because he can’t wait for you to be big enough to wrestle him. EK will probably want to choose your outfits and give you bottles and push you in the stroller. I promise to help you look like the boy that you are instead of a princess, and only let her push you fast once you can handle it.

You gave us a scare, when you were just the size of a lime. I took some tests that made us think you weren’t healthy, that you might not make it. Well, you sure showed us! We should have had faith in you and in God, and known that you would be fine. But we had a couple of hard, sad weeks, praying for your safety. You were loved, prayed for, and longed for, even then. We can’t describe how much more you are right now, and how much more you will be once you’re in our arms.

I am sure you will be every bit as amazing as your dad and your siblings. Strong, smart, handsome, musical, hilarious, snuggly, and compassionate… those are things you’ve got going for you. I know it must seem like a tall order to such a little dude, but you’ve got a little while to grow into it.

I hope you don’t mind sharing all those things (and all the other things ever) with your siblings. You’ve got quite a bit of third-hand clothing and toys, in various stages of worn-in. But you know what? There is one thing that you get brand new, just for you, that you never have to share with anyone:

My love.

You see, I have a lot of love. There is plenty to go around. I’ve got a special love for your Dad, that only he knows about. I’ve got a love for EK that’s just for her, shared between this Mommy and her daughter. I’ve got a love for J that will also be different than my love for you; he is a special guy. The love that I have for you will be a special thing that you and I will share. The love I have for exactly you will be special between us, and it will never run out or grow weary. I get all my love from the most inexhaustible source imaginable; I get all my love from Jesus. One day, you will know Him too. You can already have His love – everyone has it. He loves us all with a big, awesome love that we can hardly understand.

Always remember: you’re brave, smart and kind, you can do anything you set your mind to, and I will always love you.

Love,
Mama

mommyhood

Things Toddlers Say 

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Happy Tuesday, y’all! Hope you’re enjoying 2017 so far! Here are just a few highlights from the past week in the lives (and mispronunciations) of my kiddos… enjoy!

EK, 100x a day: J! You’re unnerrupting!

Going through the line at McDonald’s…
EK and J: Almond Donald’s had a farm! E I E I O! And on that farm he had a poop! E I E I O! With a poop poop here, and a poop poop there! Here a poop, there a poop! Every where where where where where!
Hubby and me: *silently dying of laughter*

Watching The Sound of Music, when Maria is conversing with the Reverend Mother…
J: What’s this part?
EK: Maria’s just talking to her grandma.

EK: Can you plug the tree lights in?
Me: Why don’t you do it?
EK: It’s too hard.
J: I’ll do it!
EK: Well, I got it started for you!

Me: Ahh! He almost spilled my wine!
EK: Well its right there if you need it.

Mid-argument, EK to J: Do you think I do not have eyes?!

J, in a high-pitched voice: May I pwease have a tiny, little bit of candy from my stocking, pwease? (He’s been working on his vocal inflection, specifically when asking a question.)

EK, holding a bouquet of flowers: Daddy, can you water these up?

J: *drops a piece of bread into his soup* Look! It turned into chicken!

At bedtime…
Hubby: All right, good night, J.
J: Daddy, wait!
Hubby: What’s up?
J: Happy new year, Daddy.

Hubby: How’s that bread EK?
EK: Well, I don’t like the taste of it. (Said in a way that implied nothing else was wrong with it.)

At the doctor’s office for a check up, and our doctor was just telling us he was all finished…
J: Doctor? You’re the best doctor.
Doctor: *chokes up a little* You just made my year! How about I give you a few tokens to get a prize? How many do you think you’d like?
J: One. Or two, so I can share with EK.
Me: *dies*

Well, there you have it. Adorable and hilarious children. What have your kids been talking about recently? Any Christmas or New Year’s funnies?

mommyhood, My Big Jesus, travel

5 Things Parents Do On Vacation Without Their Kids

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus. 

My husband whisked me away last week for a whirlwind trip to NYC. There were several reasons (excuses?) for the trip, including a special concert, my recent birthday, and a desperate need of time off during a busy season, and it was well-timed and perfect. While it was short (48 hours, to be exact), it was just what we needed to relax a bit and treat ourselves before we stopped sleeping entirely.


During the trip, I noticed a few things we did simply because the kids weren’t around. Life with kids is awesome, but it’s different- no one will argue that. So on our two special days without them, here are a few things we did differently…

1. Eat all the fancy food. Of course when you’re in NYC, you get a little crazy about finding good food. But Hubby and I went to restaurants we’d never dream of taking the kids. There was no macaroni and cheese on any menu, and we ate adventurously (as is our favorite thing to do).

2. Walk quickly. The pace might be a bit quicker there, but we power-walked everywhere we went. We were able to make the most of our time (and not spend a fortune on cabs) because we could be quite quick. There were no strollers, no one hanging onto us or needing to stop and rearrange their sock. We strolled around the city, Googling and Yelping to find our next destination as we walked. It was amazingly simple and free.

3. Abandon the schedule. We are whenever we were hungry, and even if we weren’t. We stayed up really late. We stayed out the entire afternoon, whereas usually we are bound by naptime. There was nowhere to be except wherever we wanted. And most importantly…

4. Sleep late. I’ll be honest, the first morning, my body clock woke me up at 7:30. But I looked at the time, rolled over, and slept two more hours! It was glorious!

5. Call home a lot. We FaceTimed and texted my aunt (who kept the kids) a couple of times a day, just to make sure things were alright. And to share what we were up to. But not because we missed the kids. Nope. Not much.

It was a great time away, and fun to remember those things you get to do without your tiny buddies. But you sure do miss them while you’re gone.