Tag Archives: mommyhood

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus

The Days Are Long, But the Years Are Short

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus!

Sometimes, cliches are stupid. You hear them, and you know they’re outdated, or they’re totally unrelated to how you’re actually feeling. (Everything happens for a reason and good things come to those who wait.) Other times, cliches are totally on par. (Two wrongs don’t make a right and laughter is the best medicine.) One cliche I’ve been hearing a lot recently (as in, ever since I became a mom) and I unfortunately agree with is this: The days are long, but the years are short.
Oh my, but the days are indeed long. They start earlier and earlier (can you say toddlers get up with the sun?) and they seem to be ending later and later. Here’s another cliche on this same note: Sleep is for the weak! Oh, that’s not a cliche? That’s just a stupid thing people say? Oh. You’re right. Anyway…

As I’m surviving my long days of diapers, chores, to-do lists, crying and clinging, I sometimes get frustrated. When naps don’t go as planned, my outings are cut short by tantrums, or the lovingly-prepared meals hit the dirty floor (for the second time), I can’t want to cash in my chips and call it a day, even if I’m in the hole.

But what about the second part? That bit about years being short… it surely hits home when I look around and see how time has flown. My daughter is a tall, lanky three. She’s twice as talkative as she was just a few short months ago, and today at the pool she was jumping off the diving board. I’m a proud mama bear, but I’m weeping on the inside, pining for her days of fat-cheeked giggles and learning to crawl.

I’m not really writing this to be like the old lady at the grocery store who tells you how much “you’ll miss this”. I’m not even writing it to say you should “enjoy the little moments”. I’m just writing it to say that, by God, you’re right. The days are long as hell sometimes. They’re so long and tedious that you’ll cry for a glass of wine and your pillow. But the years are truly short. They’re so short and sweet that you’ll be floored by how quickly the milestones are passing. Motherhood is full of these paradoxes and imbalances. So alright, I’ll say it. You might as well know that “you’ll miss this” and you should “enjoy the little moments” before they’re too quickly gone. Look for the fun in your long days, and savor all the moments you can.

mommyhood, random thoughts

Babysitters: Are You a Micro-Manager From Afar or Do You Enjoy Your Outing?

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Because I’m in the hospital with my brand new, sweet, second son (Baby D says, “Hey there!”) here’s one I wrote a little while ago!

I can be one of two things when it comes to leaving my kiddos with someone… I can be a micro-managing crazy person with a list of a hundred guidelines (read: requirements) or I can just be the trusting mom who says, “Have fun!”

My slightly-OCD tendency is to overdo it. I get worked up, setting out pajamas and sippy cups (already put together, because no babysitter ever knows how to figure that mess out) and favorite blankets. I want to write where every single item in the house can be found, a list of healthy, mom-approved foods that I know my kids will eat (and when they’re allowed to eat them), how to work the TV so that they can watch an allotted 22-minute educational show, and a detailed bedtime routine that must be strictly followed. I want to leave numbers for the closest ten people, and I want to check my phone every two minutes while I’m gone.

But let’s be honest: would that be a nice outing for me? Probably not. I’d be miserable, wondering whether or not everyone kept to my schedule, and looking at my phone every two minutes is just rude, whether I’m out with the girls or with Hubby.

The alternative to this, for me, is the opposite end of the spectrum. I just say, “Bye!” and leave it in the probably-capable hands of my babysitter. They’ll call if they need anything, right? It’s just about relinquishing my control into someone else’s hands, and in the case of my children, it’s tough.

I remember that on my 3 year old’s first day of preschool, I was so nervous. She was crying when we left (Doesn’t every kid cry on their first day of leaving Mom and Dad? No? Just tell me they do.) and I was worried all morning that there would be some need that she’d have that they wouldn’t notice, or couldn’t help her with. Not that I had chosen a preschool that I wasn’t comfortable with or anything like that. I just felt like Mama knows best, ya know?

But now that I’m pregnant with my third, I’ve become a little less crazed about it. When I take my daughter to school, I make sure her bags are packed with everything she could possibly need (yeah, I still do it) and I hug her, kiss her, and run out. I’m a little more confident.  I don’t write a big list for a babysitter, either. I offer some tips on getting them to eat dinner (It’s all about options!) or to make bedtime go more smoothly (Don’t try to do it too early!), but then I kiss those tiny angels, apply my lip gloss, and get the hell outta dodge. I mean, Mama needs a night out, right? (Side note: I am guilty of often hiring a  babysitter after my kids bedtime, so that there are no transitional issues. My 1 1:2 year old sometimes tries to squeeze out the door with me, or I can hear him hollering as I get in the car. Breaks a mama’s heart, so I avoid it where I can.)

Letting go is hard, no matter what the situation, how long you might be letting go for, and into whose hands your leaving the precious ones. How do you cope deal prepare to leave your kiddos with someone else?

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say 

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This past week we had a lovely visit from my brother and his girlfriend, and several nights spent with good friends. Naturally my kids behave way better in front of company (right?!) so this one is pretty good… and I’m totally ecstatic that J is joining the ranks of Toddlers Talking. Enjoy!

Picture this (I tried to get a picture unsuccessfully): EK walking around the house with her belly stuck way out, strutting about, talking about having a baby soon. For some reason, she was also talking strangely and had her head tucked in to create more chins. I’d like to say I don’t look like that. But it’s been happening all week.

EK, to my bro’s gf: Sometimes, I hit my brother, and Necie gets mad and spanks me. (Note: this doesn’t happen.)

Saying goodbye to my bro and his gf…
Me: Say, “bye bye!”
The kids: Bye, bye!
Me: Say, “Drive safe!”
EK: Don’t go any fast!
(Same sentiment, right?)

Shouted from across the room…
EK: Daddy! I wanna cucumba salaaaaad!
(My extremely unhealthy kid.)

A kid with an amazing memory…
EK: Mom! I see the hospital where we get the baby! (A conversation about this was had with Hubby the day before.)

Me, trying to stuff more breakfast in my kid: Joseph, would you like some of Mommy’s egg?
J: No! (Runs from the other room, mouth hanging open.)

Watching a friend open a bottle of wine, hands over her mouth… When he finally got it:
EK: You got it! You got it! Yay!
(Always worth celebrating.)

J eats a bite of cupcake: Happy birthday to you…. (It’s not anyone’s birthday. He just likes that song a lot.)

Me: EK, tell Andrea and Chris good night!
EK: Good night! Good night! (Turns to me.) Mom! I said good night to girl and boy!
Me: Well, you guys have been demoted. (EK totally knows their names.)

What funny things has your toddler said recently?

food, home, mommyhood, pregnancy, random thoughts

Currently

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Happy Monday, everyone! I won’t lie… I was hoping to be in the hospital with a baby or something right now, but since I’m not, I’ll tell you what I’m up to instead! I’m linking up as usual with Becky at Choose Happy, and some other wonderful bloggers to bring you this week’s edition of Currently…

Picking || tomatoes and more tomatoes! And also some peppers. And cucumbers and zucchinis. And even a couple of eggplants and one squash (finally). I know I keep talking about it, and I guess I should dedicate a whole post to it, but I LOVE our garden this year. Every year I’ve gotten a little more involved with it, and this year I feel like I’ve been growing those vegetables right alongside growing my baby, and it’s been so fun! It’s therapeutic, it’s a great way to get outside, and it’s fun to teach the kids about it, too. If you’ve thought about doing a garden, but haven’t done it yet, I encourage you to do it! It’s so rewarding!!

  
Finishing || the nursery. I think I might’ve said it was finished before, but I must’ve lied. It’s actually done now. We rearranged furniture, cleaned the rug, hung the drapes with dark backing, put sheets in the crib (ahhh!) and books on the bookshelves. Y’all, we are ready for this baby. 

   
We also did some finishing up in our closet/office. One of the upstairs bedrooms in our house is dedicated to the rest of our clothes (the master closet is dreadfully small) and a desk to work at (you know, if I ever want to blog from NOT the couch). It only needs curtains, and it’ll be all ready to use. Right now it’s the cleanest it’s ever been, but being on the west side of the house, the afternoons are awfully hot in there, so we don’t spend any time in there yet. Curtains and then finished! 

 Cooking || a big pot of spaghetti sauce! We had so many tomatoes that needed to be eaten, and I had gotten a text from a friend who said she was using the tomatoes we’d given her to make a pot of sauce… so I decided to do the same! We used about ten tomatoes (all different varieties and sizes) to start a huge pot of sauce. We aren’t actually eating any of it tonight (we’re also making French onion soup right now – Hubby’s craving!) but I’m going to freeze it to have it ready to go when I need a quick meal that will make my whole family happy.

Enjoying || time with my babes. I’m trying to have time with them together and one-on-one so that I can truly savor them before the baby gets here. I don’t want them to feel they’ve been neglected or abandoned (I know, worst case scenario, probably, but still) when I am gone for two whole days, and come back with a new baby! I want them to have their love tank all filled so they know how much they are treasured and loved. It’ll be a transition for everyone, and I want to start it off on the right foot if I possibly can.

Well, there’s what’s happening with me currently! Don’t worry – I’ll keep you posted when the big day arrives!

faith, mommyhood, My Big Jesus, parenting fails, women

He Will Come Through

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus!

 After a particularly difficult day with my three-year-old (that wasn’t helped by a fussy one-and-a-half-year-old who thinks it’s time to learn how to throw a proper tantrum), it was finally bedtime, and I was exhausted. I could tell the kids had had enough of me, and I had had enough of them. I hate those days that I haven’t done my best. I wasn’t the best mom to them. I didn’t use the kindest words or have the most patience – or honestly, much patience at all. The fun things I planned seemed to go awry almost immediately. Meals I prepared weren’t liked. The way I tried to fix problems didn’t work. Everything just… sucked.

After my son was down in his crib, I went into my daughter’s room. I said, “You know that I love you, right?” Head nods… with a smile, even! “You know that even when I’m angry or I’m sad, I still love you?” More nodding and smiling… then a jump into my arms.

Y’all, I couldn’t buy that forgiveness. I couldn’t buy that redemption from my difficult, beloved daughter at the end of a crappy day. I melted, tears dripping into her hair, thankful beyond words for the most perfect example of “forgive and forget”. She reminded me that though I fail, I’m still her mama, and she still wants and needs my love.

Just like her forgiveness, I also needed forgiveness for a failed day. My sin was so heavy, weighing on my mind and my heart, and my guilt was even worse. I needed a forgiving Father to smile and nod and tell me He still loved me, too. I hit my knees at the end of that day, begging Him to drag me out of the rut I couldn’t get out of on my own, begging for a reset of my attitude. He comes through, y’all. If you let Him, He comes through. It’s not easy, and often, it’s not pretty. But He comes through.

mommyhood, pregnancy, women

The Hospital Bag

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When preparing to have a baby, there are tons of things you must do. On your to-do list, packing a hospital bag should be towards the top during your third trimester. However, I’ve procrastinated like a pro. Here I am at 38 weeks today, and I’ve only just done it. Oh well. In my experience, I’ve over-packed both of the last times, so this time, I chose a smaller bag, and tried to really pare down what I’m bringing with me. We live only a couple of miles from the hospital, and I know Hubby will be going back and forth a lot because the kids will be at home and will need him to be around since I won’t be. If I forget anything, I’ll have him bring it to me, right?

Here’s the bag I chose. It was a gift from a friend a while back, and I LOVE it. It’s adorable and it’s Lilly Pulitzer. Total win.

 

One important thing to pack for is self-care. It’s dry in hospitals, so I’ve got lotion and chapstick. I’ve got oral care (I HATE having yucky teeth), hair pins/band, and I need contacts to see! I’ll also pack my face wash, deodorant, and glasses at the last minute, since I’ll be using those up until that time.

Now for a few things for baby D… Like these swaddles! The hospital blankets are totally fine, but my kids picked out these “choo choo” swaddles for their brother, and I know they’ll love to see him in them when they meet him. (And obviously they’re Aden & Anais, because those are the best.)

Newborn fingernails tend to be scratchy, so I always bring a few pairs of mittens so he doesn’t scratch himself! (I like these Gerber ones better than some of the Carter’s ones I have, simply because they stay on the tiniest wrists a little better. The Carter’s ones are good for when baby starts to get chunky!)

For clothes, I like these shirts that I call “kimono” shirts… they wrap about baby so you don’t have to pull anything over their heads.  (Pictured: Gerber’s and Carter’s. They’re both favorites.)

Gowns are a MUST for newborns, because they’re easy access for the all-the-time diaper changes. (Pictured: both from Carter’s… one stretchy one-piece, and one zip-up. I also have a couple Three Marthas brand that I like just as much.)

And for a “going home” outfit, I chose this adorable little rainbow duck outfit. It was a gift from a sweet mama in Maryland who got my name in a “mystery mama” project. She sent me gifts for three months, and this was one of them! Thanks, Ashley!  

For lounge and nursing attire, I packed a couple of nursing bras/tank tops (different sizes, since I won’t know exactly how big/small I’ll be in that first couple of days, my favorite thin robe, and a nursing cover. All comfortable, all easy-access while I’m still in the hospital.(Not pictured: my favorite high school volleyball shorts. Loose and comfy!)

Things to do… my Kindle (Maze Runner currently on deck) and Phase 10 to play with Hubby. During labor, there can be some time that you’re not “doing” much… just playing the waiting game. After baby gets there, when there aren’t any visitors and baby is nursing ALL THE TIME, you might want some reading material if you’re like me.

There aren’t many more things that will get added after these. Probably a bottle of water, a Luna bar or two, and I’ll bring my pillow. Otherwise, I’ll have the clothes on my back and whatever I beg someone to bring me later. You just don’t need that much. Everything for baby will be provided, as well as everything you need as a newly-delivered mother. I’m all about using (and gathering for take-home) anything and everything the hospital will provide: diapers, wipes, nose sucker, measuring tape (to keep track, of course!), nipple balm, pads, mesh underwear (yeah, I went there), and everything else I could possibly need for my first few days post-partum. Use the resources you have!

What did you pack in your hospital bag? Is there anything I’ve forgotten?

mommyhood, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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In a crowded, public restroom…
EK: Watch this, mom! I’m gon’ take a poop! (a minute later) Phew! That was a lot!

EK: Can I have a tiola to make a roll up? (She was asking for a tortilla.)

J, upon waking from his nap: Anna! Elsa! Olaf!
Hubby: Loud and clear, little dude. (Turns on Frozen.)

EK (apparently obsessed with poop this week): All dooooone!
Hubby goes to help check.
EK: There’s a LOT in there. I want some jelly beans!
A minute later, coming out of the bathroom…
EK: Mom! Davis is SO PROUD! (Davis is the baby we’re expecting any day.)
Me: Yes, babe, I’m sure he is!

Laying down for her nap…
EK: Daddy, get out of here!
Hubby: I thought I was your snuggle bunny!
EK: No, you’re just a daddy.

J’s new favorite word: No. It’s said totally politely, but it’s the answer to every single question anyone asks him. Great.

After Hubby accidentally dropped a French fry between the car seats…
EK: Nice one. (Always delivering the zingers.)
A few minutes later, same fries…
Hubby: EK do you like those?
EK: Mmhmm. These are my favorite fries I ever saw!

And the piece de la resistance… the moment every parent waits for…
EK: Daddy! Will you get married with me?

Heart. Melted.

What’s your toddler saying these days? And what am I going to call this post now that EK is a preschooler and definitely not a toddler? “Things Kids Say” doesn’t have the same ring to it… Suggestions welcome!

food, home, mommyhood, pregnancy, random thoughts, siblings

Currently 

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Happy Monday! I hope y’all had a wonderful weekend! I’m joining Becky at Choose Happy again this week for her currently link up. Lots of pictures in store for you today – I hope you enjoy it! Leave a comment or join the link up and let me know what’s going on with you!

Loving || Our finished shower! We chose a dark grout (it matches the wall color we chose almost perfectly!) to offset the white subway tile, and I really like the effect. We don’t have a door quite yet, because our old one is now too big, so we aren’t able to use it till we get one. Otherwise, I’m really happy with it! We need a little paint touching up in a few places, but it looks awesome.

Still undecided on the mirrors… there are two of those and they’ll be almost touching. What do you think?



Eating || at the Honey Pot! It’s a local restaurant here, and the chef is actually a friend of Hubby’s from high school. It is AMAZING. The food is fresh, mostly local, and really creative. Most of all, it’s plated beautifully and it’s outstandingly delicious! (If you’re local, check out their website here.) I wish I had taken a picture of every dish, but it was too good to not just eat it immediately. However, this dessert – a Georgia peach tart, with basil crema, accented with tiger lilies (who knew you could eat them?!) – was so beautiful I had to take a picture. And folks, it was as good as it looks. Really.

Growing || tomatoes and peppers! I mean, we are growing other stuff too, but those are our most fruitful plants at the moment. We’ve had one eggplant and some cucumbers and an ENORMOUS zucchini (I talked about that here) as well. Here are a few pictures I snapped last night as I was harvesting…



  


 

Planning || A baby shower! My sweet friend from college Melissa is expecting her first baby (a little girl!) in a couple of months, and my friend Lauren and I are throwing her a shower. We had a planning session this afternoon, and I can’t wait to post with a bunch of pictures after we shower her with love on Saturday!

Enjoying || this little series of photos. The first picture is the night before I had J… EK sprawled across my belly, the tiny little thing that she was, in her mismatched Christmas jammies. I’ve always loved that photo, and so now while I’m not so far away from having baby D, I thought it would be fun to try to recreate the moment with my two older sweeties sitting on top of their little brother!


 

Well, that’s about it in my world. Just waiting on baby D to get here! I have a post coming soon about how I packed my hospital bag – look for it this week!

What’s going on in your life currently?

 

 

mommyhood, pregnancy, siblings

5 Predictions About Life With 3 Kids

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This post also appeared on My Big Jesus!
As I’m down to my last couple of weeks before baby #3 arrives, I am forced to think of what life will be like when he gets here. With a 3 year old, a 1 1/2 year old, and a newborn, I think it’s safe to say craziness is about to ensue. Here are a few more predictions of what might be happening:

There will be an (obvious) increase in laundry. I already do approximately one load per day with the four of us. That doesn’t necessarily mean that I do one complete load every single day… it often means I do five loads in one day, and take a few days off. But it would seem as though adding a person (no matter how tiny) will make it even more so. For instance, if this kid is like my other two, there will be one more swaddle per day to wash, and that’ll basically be an entire load a week of just swaddles. Sheesh.

There will be fewer showers/baths. I’m guessing I’ll cheat on the kids’ bedtime routine some nights (usually we do baths just before bed) and take baths out of the equation. I probably won’t shower as often, due to another person clinging to me. All around, that’s some water saved (that we’ll use on laundry).

We will be eating more takeout. What can I say? It’s just easier. Am I right? We can try to keep it healthy… you know… takeout salad and such.

I will be (even more) forgetful. I’m fully prepared to enter into the stage of “Did I brush my teeth today?” and “I thought I put my car keys right here!” and “When exactly is the last time I shaved my legs?” This pregnancy has been an indicator of that. It happens a little more with every kid, they say (at least I think they do). Pregnancy brain is nothing to joke about, but when I’m keeping up with three younguns, I just can’t be surprised that I’m still looking for the… for the… well, for whatever it is I’m always losing.

My heart will be too full to describe. Y’all, I already know this one is true. I’m already full-to-bursting with love for these little guys, so I can’t imagine what meeting the next one will do. I may just explode with happiness! You know, after I remember where I keep the coffee cups and wade my way through the umpteenth load of laundry. Love. It’ll all be about love.

mommyhood, siblings, things toddlers say

Things Toddlers Say

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Talking with one of our tile workers…
Worker: I’m Kelly! What’s your name?
EK: Ella Kate. I’m three. At my next birthday I’ll be one different, though.

We’ve been rewatching the Harry Potter movies (they just came out of storage!) and the kids have been there for part of it. When the Weasleys and Harry travel using floo powder, every time the green fire happened, J would say, “Oh no!” with his eyes glued to the screen. Pretty cute.

After her nap…
EK: My hair looks crazy! I gotta go take a shower!

EK woke up in the middle of the night (She told me she had to poop. No such poop happened.) and Hubby was still at work. This was the conversation about it the next morning…
EK: Did you have a good nap?
Me: You mean after I went back to bed? I sure did.
EK: Did you snuggle daddy when he got home?
Me: I did.
EK: Aww! That was very sweet of you!

Hubby and I, discussing where to park at church…
Me: Just park in the circle.
EK: Circle? I love circles!

J, Facetiming my mom on her birthday…
EK: Joseph, can I have the phone?
J: No.
EK: Mooooom! Joseph said noooooo! (Whining big time)
Me: I heard, babe. He’ll be done in a minute.
J hands EK the phone.
EK: Necie! Joseph said noooooo! (Still whining)
This basically just shows how accustomed she is to J doing what she wants. Sweet boy just does what she says about 90% of the time, and he’s just this week started saying “no”.  She is in for it.

Things EK calls a seat belt:
Top buckle
Seat buckle
Big buckle
Belt buckle
Safe buckle
I’m thinking all are appropriate names for it.

What is your toddler saying? Leave it in the comments!